


With or Without you

by felixdreamer



Category: Women's Soccer RPF
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-11-02
Updated: 2017-06-12
Packaged: 2018-04-29 14:44:10
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 20
Words: 81,603
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5131445
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/felixdreamer/pseuds/felixdreamer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>From their first camp together, there's a special connection between Ashlyn and Ali and they quickly become best friends. But what happens when their feelings towards each other are growing? Will they have the courage to admit it or are they only meant to be friends?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The German Warrior

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first fiction and I'm not completely familiar with the time line of their friendship/relationship so I'll be taking some freedom with this story. However, I hope you'll like it, and please comment and give me feedback of what you think. Thank you!

Ashlyn flipped her phone out of the pocket to see how much time she had left before she had to head out.

“Shit” she said though her teeth when she realized she should already be on her way by now. Normally she would never allow herself to run late like this but today was not a normal day. Today was the first day of camp with the senior U.S Women’s National Team, and even if it wasn’t her first call-up, she was still nervous. Now being late made it hundred times worse. She quickly collected her bags, double checked her pockets for the phone, wallet and keys before she shot a glance in the mirror on her way out, reviled to see that at least her outfit was on point even if her mind wasn’t. 

2 hours later she was sitting at her gate, waiting for her flight from Washington DC to LA. Apparently everyone had chosen to fly out today, which made the security line a nightmare. However, she made it through and could now relax for a few minutes with her coffee before boarding the plan. Finally seated she looked at her phone again, 7:14 am; this was going to be a long day. 20 minutes later they were up in the air and she was already asleep. 

Fifteen minutes past 10 am local time she entered the baggage claim area and started to look for her bag. While waiting she heard her name being called out and she turned around to see where it came from. 

“ASHLYYYYYYN” Tobin Heath now screamed and threw herself into Ashlyn’s arms. The both girls had been playing together at UNC and had known each other for some years by now. The younger of the women had already been on the USWNT for a few years and Ashlyn immediately felt calmer by the fact that she had her friend by her side. 

“Tobs..for God sake, are you trying to kill me before camp even started?” the blonde teased her friend while she tried to regain balance. 

Before she received an answer they got interrupted when the rest of the girls Tobin had sprinted away from in excitement reached them. With Abby in front they came up to the both women and Ashlyn received a hug from the veteran as well as from HAO and Pinoe. While making some small talk with the shorthaired blonde she noticed the women standing a little behind the rest of them and gave Abby a nod her way, quietly asking who she was.

“Oh right, sorry. We found our own German Warrior on our way to the baggage claim. Ash this is Ali, Ali Krieger” Abby said with a smile. 

Ashlyn’s mouth went dry when her eyes met the brunette’s. So this is the famous Ali Krieger she thought. The Penn State Alumni who left the country to play for the German top club 1. FFC Frankfurt after college without knowing a word German. With their eyes still locked together she left Pinoe and walked up to her and reached out a hand. 

“Hi Ali, I’m Ashlyn, Ashlyn Harris. But you can call me Ash” she gave the shorter woman her signature smile, showing her famous dimple without letting go of her hand.

“Ash..nice to meet you” Ali said with a smile herself. Not sure how to handle the butterflies she had felt in her stomach from the moment their eyes met. 

“Same” Ashlyn said while she slowly let go of Ali’s hand which she was still holding. Not sure why she immediate missed the tough from the shorter woman she rubbed her neck and shyly looked down on her feet. 

“Well kids, we won’t get our bags if we’re standing here making small talk, let’s get moving” Abby took control of the situation and shoved the four women closer to the luggage carousel, hoping that they wouldn’t be stuck there forever.

When all five women had their bags they continued outside and waited together for the bus which was sent to take them to the hotel and Ashlyn tried her best to make a good impression. She quickly realized that Ali had the most enchanting laughter she ever heard and when the shorter woman crinkled her nose and squeezed her eyes together, laughing at something Ashlyn said, she found herself with a feeling of warmth inside. 

Their group was the first one arriving to the hotel and as they got welcomed by Pia and the rest of the staff, Ashlyn watched Ali interact with their coaches from a distance. She truly was the most beautiful human being Ashlyn ever met and she couldn’t wait to get to know what secrets was hidden behind those cinnamon colored eyes of the German Warrior. 

“It’s nice to see you all here and I guess we can get started with checking you in to your respective rooms. The next bus will not be here in a couple of hours so it no point waiting for the rest” Pia said as she flipped through her papers as an indicator that they could get moving. They all walked up to the desk and got their room keys one after the other and when Ali was the only one left, Ashlyn stayed by the desk pretending to look for something in her backpack, trying to hear how far away from each other they got their rooms.

“Miss Krieger, welcome back. It’s nice to see you again” the receptionist said as she was scrolling through her computer to find Ali’s name and her room number. “Oh, it seems like you will be rooming with Miss Harris here” she said with a smile and a nod to Ashlyn who was still standing by the desk. “Here’s your key, I hope you and the team will have a great couple of weeks here”. Ashlyn froze by her words, still pretending to find something in her bag. She could feel Ali’s eyes on her back and she slowly turned around to look at the brunette and give her a shy smile. The others had already walked away towards their rooms so they where the only ones left in the lobby. Ashlyn looked back and forth from the brunette to the receptionist, not really sure if she actually head what she thought she heard or if she made it up in her mind. It was almost too good to be true. 

“Sounds perfect” Ali said, looking the taller woman straight in the eyes, as she took the key and started to walk towards the elevators. “Are you coming or what?” Ali once again spoke up and Ashlyn quickly collected her belongings, almost forgetting the key folder on the desk but remembered it at the last second and shoved it into her backpack before she followed Ali through the hallway. Was this a dream? Or was someone messing with her? Was she, as one of the newbie’s on the team, lucky enough to get Ali Krieger the German Warrior everyone seemed to love, as her roommate? Caught in her own thoughts she didn’t notice that Ali had stopped in front of the elevator, which made her walk straight into her. 

“Ouuff…what are you doing?” Ali nearly screamed when Ashlyn’s body hit hers and they both almost fell over the luggage standing next to her as she was waiting for the elevator to reach the entrance floor. 

“Shit..ehm..I..ee..sorry” Ashlyn stuttered as the both women now were standing pressed against each other since the blonde had reached out and captured Ali, saving her from falling. No one moved for a few seconds before both of them realized how close they were standing. Ashlyn quickly let go of Ali’s waist and took a step backwards at the same time as Ali released her grip of Ashlyn’s shoulders. “I wasn’t paying attention to where I was walking I guess” she said and her face turned red as she were rubbing her neck and studying something extremely interesting on the carpet by her feet. 

“No shit, you don’t say” Ali tried to keep a straight face looking at the blonde woman with her arms crossed over her chest but failed when she saw how embarrassed she was and started to laugh instead. Ashlyn’s head snapped up by the sound and she yielded Ali a confused look. “You’re not mad?” she quietly asked and the brunette continued to laugh instead of answering. Ashlyn then allowed a cautious smile to play in the corner of her mouth and she shrugged and apologized once again before they stepped into the elevator and pressed the button for the fifth floor. 

As soon as the door closes behind them and the machine started to move upwards something in Ali changed. She closed her eyes and held tightly in the handle of her suitcase. Ashlyn could immediately both feel and see the change and she looked at the now stiff woman in front of her thoughtfully before she put a hand on the brunettes shoulder.

“Hey Ali, are you okay?” she asked and the shorter woman jumped by the touch, without opening her eyes. 

“No, but I will be as soon as I’m out of this machine” she said with a nervous laugh. “I don’t particularly like elevators to be honest but I’m not in the mood of dragging my bags up the stairs to the fifth floor either so here I am” another anxious laugh followed along with the sound indicating the elevator had stopped on their floor. Before Ashlyn could say something, Ali had left the tight space in favor for the more spacious hallway. 

“You know, I would have taken your bags in the elevator if you just had told me” the blonde said as she stepped out in the hallway to join the brunette. “That way you could have walked without thinking of dragging the bags with you”. She shrugged once again with the shy smile playing in the corner of her mouth as she’s looking at the brunette. 

“Yeah I’ll remember that, thank you” Ali said without meeting her eyes before she turned around and walked towards their shared room, still looking a little shaky from the enclosed ride. Ashlyn stood still, following the brunette’s back as she walked away and left her. This could be an interesting camp, she said to herself as she threw her backpack over the shoulder and started to follow the brunette through the hallway towards the room they would share over the next three weeks. 

When the blonde reached their door she found a shoe between the door and the frame and she reviled a chuckle at Ali’s thoughtfulness. She entered the room and found the brunette sitting on the bed closest to the door, scrolling through her phone. 

“Thank you for leaving the door opened” she said as she placed her bags on the floor.

“No worries, I thought you might have a hard time finding your key since you threw it in your backpack” the brunette said with a smirk, as she stood up and put her phone away. “Which bed do you prefer?” she then asked the blonde. 

“Ehm…I don’t really care. You can take the one you want” Ashlyn said while looking at the brunette who glanced from bed to bed for a few seconds. 

“Okay if you say so, then I’ll take this one” Ali said, moved her bags to one side and sat down on the same bad as when Ashlyn entered the room. “Do you know when we’ll have the team meeting tonight?” she changed subject as she opened her first bag, trying to find the Nike t-shirt and sweatpants they were required to wear whenever they did anything along with the team. 

“If no one is delayed I think the last bus is scheduled to arrive at 4 pm and then there’s a meeting an hour later, right before dinner” the blonde said, surprisingly sure of herself. Keeping track of when and where to meet had never been one of the defenders strong sides and somehow, that was the impression she had gain of the keeper too during the short amount of time they had spent together. Therefore, she shot the blonde a look of surprise. 

“Someone is prepaid for camp I hear” Ali said with a smirk. “I didn’t take you for someone paying much attention to the schedule. Thought I would have you hanging after me during those weeks” the brunette now glanced at the blonde with one of her eyebrows raised. 

“Shut up Krieger, everything is not always what it seems to be” Ashlyn responded and reached her tongue out against the now laughing woman across of her. “I actually like to know what I’m doing and are supposed to do in the nearest future, as well as I like to have it neat and tidy around me, believe it or not” the blonde continued before she shut her suitcase closed. 

“I’m just joking with you dork, even though I wouldn’t take you for the most organized person for some reason” Ali said, smiling at the taller woman standing in front of her. 

“Whatever you say princess, let’s take a walk and see if any of the other girls has arrived” the blonde said as she walked towards the door with a giggling Ali close behind her.


	2. A Serious Talk

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Camp continues and the both women are getting to know each other.

Ashlyn and Ali quickly become inseparable. Outside of their room they are doing almost everything together. At breakfast they are sitting next to each other as well as on the bus to practice. They are stretching together and keeping each other company at treatment. Their teammates are noticing it and a couple of eyebrows are raised here and there due to the fact that the two women become so close in no time. However, they don’t make a big deal of it. Both Ashlyn and Ali are grown up and if they already have found a friendship in each other, the others are happy for them.

 

“Ash, have you seen my phone” the brunette asking from under the bed where she is crawling around in the search of the lost item. It is the fifth day of camp and they just got back to the hotel after their morning practice. Ashlyn, on her way into the shower, yells a no back before turning the water on.

 

“Where the heck did I put it then” the defender mumbles while standing up from the floor. “I had it right her”. She scratches her head and looks around but decides to give up after lifting both hers and the blonde’s pillows without any luck. She will find it sooner or later. Hopefully sooner but if she know herself, it can be anywhere so later is probably a better guess.

 

After a few minutes, Ashlyn enters the room again, dressed in nothing but a pair of loose Nike shorts and a sports bra. “Did you found it?” the blonde asks as she is unwrapping the towel she has around her hair.

 

Ali is not answering; her eyes are fixed at the tattoo running over the keepers ribs. “Princess, the world is calling” Ashlyn says with a smirk when she turns around and sees what the brunette are looking at.

 

“Uuhmm…eeh..yea..I mean no, I didn’t” the shorter woman mumbles as her cheeks turns red. “No, I didn’t find it” she repeats after clearing her throat, without looking Ashlyn in the eyes. The heat in the room increases with at least 15 degrees and the brunette starts to pick with the pile of clothing on her bed, avoiding Ashlyn’s gaze.

 

The blonde chuckles and raises one of her eyebrows, studying the very embarrassed defender for a moment before she decides to tease her. “Do you like it?” she says.

 

“Do I like what?” Ali asks innocent even though she is painfully aware of what the blonde actually refers to.

 

“The tattoo you couldn’t take your eyes of a few seconds ago” Ashlyn says, still studying the brunette who refuses to look at her.

 

The shorter woman slowly turns around, staring at her for a moment before she takes a step closer and reaches out her hand towards the keeper’s shirtless torso. “Yes I do” she says shyly. “Can I touch it?”

 

Ashlyn just nods, following Ali’s arm with her eyes as it gets closer to her half naked body. A second later the gap is closed and the brunette’s fingers are tracing the pattern of flowers running from right under the blonde’s breast down to her waistband. They are standing like that for awhile before Ali breaks the silence. “It’s beautiful” she says with her hand still following the ink. “But who is Christopher Ryan?” The question is addressed to the name at the very top of the tattoo, right under the blonde’s sports bra.

 

“Chris is my brother, my older brother” Ashlyn says with a smile. Even though they spent almost every awaken hour for the last couple of days together, they still know very little about one another.

 

“Oh I see, are you guys close?” Ali asks cautiously, she knows from her own experience that family can be a sensitive topic.

 

The blonde is still smiling when she answers, “Yes we are now. We’ve had our difficulties in the past, our whole family has, but today he’s one of the most important people in my life”.

 

“Difficulties?” Ali asks before she can stop herself and when she sees the keeper hesitate she quickly continues. “You don’t have to answer if you don’t want to. I’m a bit too curious from time to time for my own good. I didn’t want to make you feel uncomfortable; I know we’re still getting to know each other”.

 

“It’s cool Ali I want to tell you, don’t worry, but I won’t give you the whole story now though; it would take way too long time” the blonde hesitates once again before she continues. “My brother, as well as others in my family, has been struggling with addiction and mental illness, some of them as long as I can remember. Chris was really deep down before he became sober and a few years went by when we didn’t talk to each other. Everything changed when he managed to turn his life around and ever since, our relationship has been great and as I said, he is very important to me” Ashlyn says, still smiling but emotions in her voice betraying her.

 

Tears are filling the brunette’s eyes as she looks at Ashlyn and the only thing she can do, is take another step closer to the blonde and pull her in for a hug. “I am so sorry Ash, so very sorry. I can’t say that I know exactly how it feels but partially, I do. My brother has also struggled with addiction, a few years ago now but it was bad, really bad. He didn’t become sober until I almost died” she tells the blonde, while tears streaming down her cheeks.

 

“Died?! When did you almost die? What happened?” Ashlyn stares at the brunette in shock, without care about what their conversation really was about.

 

Ali lets a light chuckle out and takes a step backwards so she can look the taller woman in the eyes. “I didn’t mean to steal the spotlight away from you and your family, but to make a long story short, I broke my leg right before the NCAA tournament my Junior year at Penn State, suffered from blood clots and multiple small heart attacks after a flight back from my family in Florida. The doctors said that if I had fallen asleep that night, I would most likely not have woken up again”.

 

Ashlyn is now in complete shock and she is having a hard time taking in what the woman in front of her just reviled. She has never, in her whole life, met someone more alive than Ali Krieger, and in a heartbeat she is aware of why. That experience, being so close to take her last breath, must have changed her. It must have made her see life from a different perspective and she understands why the defender strives to be as much alive as she possibly can, every second of every day, when she was given a second chance. The blonde is now the one closing the distance between them, draping her arms around the shorter woman and hugging her tightly without any need for words. Her action speaks for itself.

 

They are standing like that, seeking strength in one another for awhile. After this serious conversation, their first, both Ashlyn and Ali feels relieved. They know that they can trust each other and they have both found someone who knows how it feels dealing with tough things within the family, as well as almost career ending injuries. However, they both feels like it’s time to lighten the mood and Ali are the first one breaking the tension with bringing up her mysteriously lost phone again. “Are you completely sure you haven’t seen my phone? I can’t find it anywhere” she says with a begging look as she letting go of the blonde. Like that look would make Ashlyn suddenly remember that she actually knows where it is. “I know I had it right here before but now it’s gone” she throws her arms out, looking at the keeper. “No I can assure you that I haven’t, but we’ll find it later, I promise” she says with a shrug, as she reaches out for her shirt and pulls it over her head.

 

When the both women are showered and changed into their free-time gear, they are laying down on their respective beds to rest for awhile. Practicing with the national team isn't like practice with your club team. Here you have 26 of the best soccer players in the world on the same field. The intensity is through the roof and the competitiveness is deadly which leaves the players with tired and sore bodies, especially now in the beginning of camp, before they get use to the tempo. They are both on their phones, since Ali eventually find hers, catching up with friends and family through text, but Ashlyn quickly gets bored and wants to do something since they have the rest of the day off. 

 

"How about taking a walk by the water?" she asks the brunette, referring to the beach located a 10 minute walk away from their hotel. Ali, who is still focused on her phone now when she finally has it again, looks up at the blonde. "Huuuh..? I'm sorry, I didn't hear what you said" she says, putting her phone down to focus on Ashlyn instead. 

 

"I asked if you want to join me for a walk on the beach" she repeats with a smile. "I'm getting bored in here". 

 

Ali looks at her, laughing. "Yes that sounds perfect. But you'll have to work on you patients because there will be a lot of free time during the upcoming weeks and don't expect me to keep you entertained all the time. I need my rest" the brunette says, still laughing. 

 

"Yeah yeah, whatever you say grandma. I can treat you with an ice cream if you are nice" the blonde says with a grin, already knowing the defenders love for it. “Perhaps even Mint Chocolate Chip if you are reeeeeally nice”.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

”What’s your biggest dream?” Ashlyn asks the brunette while they are walking by the ocean with an ice cream each.

 

Ali doesn’t answer right away but when she does, she says it like it’s the most obvious thing ever. “Winning the World Cup of course”.

 

“Of course?” the keeper asks.

 

“Yes, of course. That has been my dream as long as I can remember. Obviously I want other things to, both on and off the field such as winning the Olympics and one day create a family with someone I love but my biggest dream has always been, and will always be until the day I fulfill it, winning the World Cup” she shrugs as she says it and looks out over the water.

 

Now it’s Ashlyn’s turn to be quiet for awhile. She reflects about what the brunette just said and realizes that they have very similar dreams. The only difference is that Ashlyn, first and mostly, dreams about earning her first senior cap before anything else, something the defender did a couple of years ago.

 

“Do you think you will fulfill that dream next year?” she asks, referring to the World Cup in Germany the upcoming summer.

 

“I hope so” Ali says. “That is what I think about every morning when I wake up, as well as every evening when I go to bed. Striving toward the gold medal is what makes me push myself every practice and every game. That dream, and the possibility to fulfill it within a year, is what keep me motivated” she continues, still staring out over the water with a dreaming look on her face, like she’s imagine herself with the trophy in her hand.

 

“You are amazing Ali, you know that, right?” Ashlyn says.

 

“Amazing? What do you mean?” the brunette’s cheeks become red again and she looks slightly confused.

 

“I’ve never, in my whole life, met someone like you. You’re the most humble, caring, loving and hardworking woman I can think of and I can’t with words describe how happy I am that I’ve been given the opportunity to get to know you” Ashlyn explains as she shrugs. “I know we haven’t known each other for many days but I’m already glad that you are a part of my life”.

 

Ali is lost of words and has no idea how to meet this wonderful compliment from the always so tough keeper. Hearing those words from Ashlyn makes her feel special because she knows that the blonde doesn’t throw love here and there, she has to trust you and you have to earn it before she opens up and shows what a wonderful person she is. Therefore, those words mean everything to Ali.

 

“Aaaww Ash, I..I don’t..I don’t even know what to say” she finally mumbles.

 

“You don’t have to say anything, I just want you to know how amazing I thing you are” Ashlyn answers. “Come on princess, let’s walk back to the hotel”.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and I hope you like it, things are going to move on a little bit faster from now on!!


	3. Surprise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashlyn misses her best friend and decides to surprise her.

Camp has come to an end and on their last night together, before their respective flights leave in the morning, Ashlyn and Ali decides to go out and eat, just the two of them. Ashlyn makes a reservation but refuses to let Ali know where they are going. Three weeks ago, she barely knew who Ali Krieger was, now she consider the brunette one of her best friends and she want to give her a night to remember since they don’t know when they will see each other next time. They are getting dressed and of course Ali is whining over the fact that she doesn’t know where they are going and therefore, not know what to wear.

“Ash, you have to tell me. Otherwise I might be totally overdressed, or even worse, underdressed” she says as she stands in nothing but a towel after her shower, begging the blonde to tell her.

“Princess, you could go out in a garbage bag and still look good so don’t worry, and I will tell you if you’re totally off before we leave” Ashlyn promise with a grin on her face before she walks into the bathroom to take a shower herself.

When she eventually is ready to leave, Ali is still in the bathroom, doing who knows what. The blonde glances at her watch, realizing they need to get moving soon if they want to make it to the restaurant in time.

“Al, will you be done any time soon? We need to get going, it’s already 7:15” she says slightly impatient. Waiting has never been one of her strengths and she’s now pacing back and forth in their room to still her nerves. She knows it’s not a date but she wants to make this a memorable night and a good start would be to be on time for their table.

"I'm coming, I'm coming, just have to finish up my makeup", she brunette yells through the door and Ashlyn, who rolls her eyes, is not surprised. If she has learned something about Ali Krieger during the three weeks they've lived together, it is that her nickname "princess" is more than accurate.

 

The dinner is wonderful, Ashlyn made a reservation at a restaurant by the beach and they spend the whole evening talking about everything and anything. When they're finished and the blonde has paid, much to Ali's protests, they take a walk on the beach for awhile before heading back to the hotel. They both embrace the silence; the moment doesn’t need any words as they are thinking about their future. Ali is going to fly back to Germany the next day while Ashlyn is taking off to Washington and they don’t know when they will be given the chance to see each other next time.

“Promise me we will keep in tough Ash. Promise me that you will text and call and not forget me” Ali’s says as she’s the first to break the silence.

“Of course, do you seriously think that I could forget you? Not a chance” the blonde says with a laugh. “The past three weeks has been the best ones I’ve had in a long time, and that’s not only because it’s been camp with the national team. Getting to know you have been a big part of it to” she continues shyly. They walk for a couple of more minutes before the grab a cab back to the hotel.

 

The next morning comes way to fast and both Ashlyn and Ali are having a hard time collecting their last belongings and leave the room they’ve shared for the past three weeks. Taking that step will mean that camp is officially over and that it’s time to go home. Ali is sitting cross-legged on her bed, watching as the blonde closes her last bag.

“That’s it. I’m done” Ashlyn says as she turns around to face Ali’s sad expression. She looks at the brunette with a smile. “We’ll see each other again you know. This is not the last time, and I promise that we’ll talk as much as possible until next time” she says and tries to wipe the sadness off of Ali’s face.

“I know, of course I know. But it still sucks that we have to say goodbye and travel to different parts of the world” the brunette says and shrugs. “I’ll miss having you around everyday”.

“Believe me when I say I feel exactly the same. But refuse packing will not solve that little problem of ours” Ashlyn laughs. “You know we’ll stay friends no matter what so get ready princess; we need to be down there in 10 minutes to say goodbye to the rest of the girls”.

Their respective flights would leave LA with only an hour apart which made them take a cab together to the airport. The rest of the team has later flights so before they get going, they say goodbye to everyone in the lobby, a procedure that takes forever with all the hugging and good luck wishes.

“Have a safe flight guys and take care” Pinoe says to them born before approaching Ashlyn for a huge. “And you,” she lower her voice and whispers to the keeper, “You should tell Ali how you feel”.

Ashlyn looks at her with a confused expression. “I have no idea what you’re talking about” she says, also whispering, which makes Pinoe laugh and she taps her on the shoulder before turning around to say a proper goodbye to Ali too.

 

“What’s the first thing you’re going to do when you get home?” Ashlyn asked the brunette in the cab.

Before answering Ali has to think. “I will probably call Kyle on Skype as soon as I’m back in my apartment, I usually does. But then I’ll go to bed, I’m always exhausted after traveling overseas. How about you?” 

“Definitely lay down in my own bed. Seriously, I’ll drop my bags as soon as I step inside and then take off towards my bedroom. I can’t wait” Ashlyn says while laughing. “You have no idea how much I love that bed”.

Ali is also laughing, but mostly because the blonde looks incredibly cute in this excited state of hers. “I can only imagine”. She continued to laugh at the dreaming gaze in Ashlyn’s eyes as they pulled up to the airports entrance. “We’re here Ash” she says as she gently taps the blonde’s shoulder, a gesture that greets her with a groan and the look of a grumpy five year old kid.

Two hours later, they are standing together at Ali’s gate. It’s time to say their goodbye and none of them wants to take the step, but Ashlyn realizes that the time has come.

“I’ll see you in no time princess, and we’ll talk as soon as you’re back in Germany” she says as she approaches the brunette for a huge. “And don’t you dare to cry because then I will too, and I’m way too cool for that you know”.

Ali can only laugh at the blonde as she hugs her back. “I won’t cry stud, but I’ll miss you like crazy”.

Ashlyn stays for a few minutes, watching as Ali boarding the plane. Before the brunette disappears she turns around, waves, and blows a kiss at Ashlyn.  

 

Ashlyn got called up to the national team several times in the beginning of the new year but every time, Ali’s contract with Frankfurt prevented her from coming, her occupation in Germany gave her an excused absence. Therefore, their contact was limited to text and Skype calls during several months but Ashlyn eventually gets tired of the distance and decides to surprise the defender.

**Ash:** Hey Princess, let me know when you’re back from practice. Haven’t talked in daaaaaays!!!

**Ali:** Hahah hey stud, just reached the looker room. text u when im home :)

**Ash:** Perfect, talk soon

Ashlyn is standing at the airport in Frankfurt, waiting for her bag and only texts Ali to know more exactly when she will be home. She has planned this trip for a couple of weeks and it has not been easy to keep it a secret. She is already used to sharing everything with Ali and lying to her face, even if it’s for a good cause, hasn’t been easy. Her bag finally enter the luggage carousel and she takes it and walks away to grab a coffee while waiting for the brunette to confirm she’s back in her apartment. It takes awhile but after 2 cups of coffee, Ashlyn’s phone buzzes to tell her a message has arrived.

**Ali:** I’m home!!! Can I call u?

Ashlyn panics slightly, and tries to come up with a quick excuse why the brunette can’t call right now.

**Ash:** Sorry, had to run out, I’ll be back in an hour :(

**Ash:** So sorry!!!

**Ali:** Ashhhhhhhh, are u kidding me?

**Ali:** I rushed home from practice…

**Ash:** I know, and I’m sorry, should have told u

**Ali:** Whatever, let me know when u has time for me...

The blonde sighs as she starts to walk, she didn’t expect Ali to get pissed at her but knowing the defender, she wasn’t surprised. Even though Ashlyn was the one taking initiative for a call, Ali’s still the victim. However, that will hopefully change as soon as the brunette opens the door, finding Ashlyn there. Or, on the other hand, that might make her even more pissed, she does not like being kept in the dark, not knowing what’s going on around her.

It does not take more than half an hour to get from the airport to the defenders apartment and when Ashlyn steps out and grabs the bag from the car’s trunk, she’s all of a sudden nervous. She shakes her head and walks inside, telling herself it’s nothing to be nervous about but when the elevator stops at Ali’s floor, the keeper is ready to turn around. What if Ali doesn’t want to see her, what if she has company, what if this is the most stupid idea ever. Once again she shakes her head, walks up to Ali’s door, knocks, and waits for what feels like forever. Eventually the door swings open and Ali’s surprised expression makes her freeze, the only thing she can do is stand there with a silly smile on her face.

“Hi princess” she finally says, still smiling.

“Ash-whaa-what are you doing here?” the brunette stumbles over the words before she throws herself at Ashlyn, who drops her belongings just in time to catch the flying defender.

“I missed my favorite person so I decided to take a trip to Germany” the blonde mumbles into Ali’s neck as she hugs her tightly.

They are standing like this for a few more seconds before the brunette releases her grip and take a step back. She is still not sure what to think. Ashlyn is not supposed to be here, knocking on her door. But yet she is, and Ali can’t be happier.

“You are here” she sighs, looking into Ashlyn’s eyes before she closes the gap between them and hugs the keeper again. “You are here” she repeats, as if it’s not true unless she says it out loud. “You’re crazy, you know that right?” she is now laughing.

“Crazy? How can you say that right after I flew across the world to see you?” the blonde answers with a smirk. “You should be happy to see me, not insulting me”.

“Well, that is exactly the reason I find you crazy, who flies across the world? That is insane!!”

“I do, because I missed my best friend, who happens to live way too far away for my liking” Ashlyn is now slightly embarrassed, what if she actually is crazy for doing this? “So, are you going to let me in or what?” they are still standing in the staircase and Ashlyn is now rubbing her neck, somewhat uncomfortable, not knowing what else to do with her hands.

“Oh yeah, of course, I’m sorry. And I’m just kidding, you’re everything but crazy. I’m so glad you are her” Ali can see hesitation in the blonde’s movement and tries to ease the tension that suddenly occurred between them. “How was the flight? You must be both exhausted and hungry”

“It wasn’t that bad, took just over 9 hours but you’re right, I really am tired. And starving as well, the airline food isn’t something to cheer about” the blonde jokes as she enter the apartment she has seen through Skype hundreds of times in the last couple of months.

“I bet you are, let’s get your stuff inside and we can decide what to eat, I don’t really have anything at home, didn’t expect company you know” Ali says with a smile.

“Anything is fine for me, as long as I don’t have to dress up” the blonde says as she starts to walk around in the apartment. “I like this place, it’s very much you, but it’s bigger than I thought”.

“What do you mean? How is something “like me”?” Ali asks with an eyebrow raised, laughing.

“Well, it’s pretty, and I don’t know…it just feels like you” Ashlyn says with a shrug before she continues to explore the rest of the apartment.

 

They soon realize Ali was right; she doesn’t have anything suitable for eating. Therefore, they walk a couple of blocks till they reach an Italian place, where Ali’s a regular. Even though the blonde does everything in her power to stay alert and interested in the conversation, the long flight has marked her and she’s having a hard time staying tuned in. Ali keeps talking about how this is exactly what she needs, what a great surprise it was, everything they have to do while Ashlyn is there, and a thousand other things. Just like she always does. Eventually she stops, and looks at the blonde across the table.

“I think someone wants me to shut up so we can go home” Ali says with a grin on her face. “I’m sorry Ash, I can see you’re exhausted, I’m just so excited you’re here”.

“No worries, I’m glad to be here too of course, and I think I will survive being a little tired” Ashlyn says with a smile. Even though she can barely keep her eyes open, she doesn’t want the night to end. She could listen to Ali talking forever and ever.

“Let’s get going, it’s a new day tomorrow and we’ll have so much to do so you need to get your rest” the brunette says, smirking.

Ashlyn groans, “I don’t even want to know what you’ve planned, but I would guess it includes me carrying a lot of bags from different stores as well as waiting outside a dressing room” she says with a pained expression.

Ali is now giggling, “That’s for me to know and for you to find out” she says as they start to walk back to the apartment. “It will be fun, I promise”.

Back at the apartment, Ali realizes the sleeping situation isn’t optimal, since she only has one bed. She can’t however let Ashlyn sleep on the couch after traveling around the world to see her so before the blonde becomes aware of the problem, she offers her to take the bed.

“It’s totally fine with me, I promise. You need a good night of sleep after your flight and that won’t happen on the couch. You take the bed” she says when Ashlyn protests.

“Al, I won’t kick you out of your own bed. I’m the one showing up on your doorstep without any notice, I’ll take the couch” the blonde continued to argue.

“For God sake Ash, just take the bed already” Ali laughs as she sets she couch ready for herself. “You’re adorable when you’re stubborn but this time you won’t win”.

“Fine, whatever you say princess” Ashlyn mutters before she enter the bathroom to get ready for bed.

 

Both women lie awake for a long time, thinking about the other, wishing they could lie next to each other, making small talk before falling to sleep. Just as they’ve done over the phone hundreds of times. Now they are so close, yet so far away. When the morning comes, Ashlyn wakes up to the smell of freshly brewed coffee and it takes a second before she remember where she is. She puts a shirt over her head with a smile on her face before she leaves the bedroom and follows the wonderful scent to the kitchen.

“Good morning sleepy head” Ali greets her as she’s sitting by the counter, drinking coffee and reading a newspaper.

Ashlyn rubs her still sleepy eyes, slightly bothered by the sun, “Good morning” she mumbles, heading to the coffee machine before she sits down next to the brunette.

Two cups of coffee later, Ashlyn is finally awake and they start to discuss what to do during the day. Ali has a lifting session before lunch, but after that she has the whole day off.

“I’ll hopefully be back here around 12, no later than 12:30 though. Then we can head out for lunch and later for some other fun things” the brunette suggest with a smirk.

Ashlyn raises an eyebrow as she looks at the defender, “You and I, we do not have the same preferences when it comes to what is “fun”, and you know that” she says.

“Of course I do, that’s why I won’t tell you what we are going to do” Ali says, laughing at the keepers grumpy face as she puts her cup in the dishwasher and leaves the room to get ready for training session.

 

The rest of the day includes, just as the blonde predicted, shopping. Something Ali loves almost as much as she loves soccer. Ashlyn on the other hand, hates it. But, she can’t say no to Ali Krieger, it’s impossible and therefore, she finds herself sitting outside a new dressing room, who knows for which one in order.

“Aliiiiii, what on earth are you doing? You’ve been in there forever” she whines as she looks at her watch. Forever might be on the high side, but it has been at least fifteen minutes since the brunette walked in with a pile of clothing. Without an answer, the door swings open and Ali steppes out. At the same moment, Ashlyn’s brain stop to function properly and her mouth goes dry, the only thing she can do is staring at the woman in front of her. The woman, her best friend more exactly, is standing there in a short, black, very taste full dress and she can do nothing but look at her.

“Do you like what you see stud?” she questions with a smirk and one eyebrow raised as she looks at Ashlyn.

“I-ehem-I, yes I do” she finally says, still looking somewhat shocked and also embarrassed. She looks away and starts tracing the pattern of her tattoo instead of meeting the brunette’s eyes.

  
“Good, because I’m thinking of wearing it when I show you the nightlife in Frankfurt” Ali teases her, well aware of the impact she has made on the blonde.

 

The rest of the day flies by and suddenly it’s time to go to bed again. The German weather has decided to show some power and a storm is raging outside. Cuddled up on the couch after a movie, the both women listens to the thunder in silence for awhile before Ali speaks up.

“I don’t like the thunder” she confesses with a slightly embarrassed look. If there is one thing Ali Krieger hates, it is showing herself vulnerable. She’s a warrior, at least that’s what everyone else thinks of her and she has to admit that she likes that epithet. It makes her feel like she’s special and showing that she’s just like everyone else, makes her feel unsure. But Ashlyn, she just laughs lightly and lets her hand rest at the brunette’s arm as she can feel Ali tens up.

“It’s okay to be afraid of things, I have a few of them myself” she admits with a shrug.

“You do?” it’s not without surprise Ali glances over at the blonde.

“Of course, everyone does silly” she laughs. “But promise you won’t tell anyone, I’m still a badass you know” Ashlyn starts to get up from the couch, stretching her arms over her head. “I better get to bed now if I want to be able to keep up with you during the rest of the week” with a smirk she collects their tea cups and turns toward the kitchen, leaving Ali at the couch.

Ali wakes up in the middle of the night with her heart pounding. The storm is now even wors and the thunder is right over them. She feels the panic building up in her chest and before thinking twice, she leaves her bed, heading to her bedroom. She opens the door quietly and sneaks in.

“Ash” she whispers, as she gently touches her arm. “Ash” she repeats and the blonde slowly gain consciousness.

“W-what, has something happened?” she mumbles, still half asleep.

“I-I’m sorry. It’s just, you know, the thunder” she lets the rest of the sentence die out. “Can I sleep her with you?” she hasn’t finished the question before the blonde makes room for her in the bed.

“Of course” she says with a sleepy smile.

Ali lies down next to the blonde, who puts the blanker around the smaller women as the storm continues to rage outside. “Can you hold me” she whispers after a few minutes and without answering, the blonde wraps her arms around Ali and hold her tightly.

“Sweet dreams princess” she mumbles into the brunette’s hair before they both fall asleep.


	4. You're the Best

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The line between friendship and something more becomes more and more blurry, will any of them have the courage to take the step?

The week flies by in no time and the two women are trying to enjoy their time together as much as possible instead of thinking about the fact that Ashlyn will be on her way back to the states in a few days. After the night with the storm, Ali goes to bed with the blonde, justifying it by saying they can lie next to each other and talk before they gets tired and she leaves for the couch. Of course that’s not what happens, the brunette falls asleep next to Ashlyn every night and the blonde does not know what to think about it. For all she knows, Ali is straight, and they are best friends. But she would lie if she said there wasn’t a connection between them and, thinking back to Pinoe’s statement as they left camp, Ashlyn is not the only one noticing it.

It’s Saturday, their last night together, and it’s time for them to explore the nightlife in Frankfurt. But before that, they are going out for dinner. Ali, who knows the city, has made a reservation at one of the most popular restaurants and from there it’s only a couple of blocks to one of her favorite clubs. A club usually not crowded by teenagers but still one with good music as well as dance floor and bar.

Ali takes, as usual, forever to get ready and the blonde is sitting in the kitchen with a beer in her hand, waiting. During the week, the physical interaction between her and the brunette has increased and even though the words aren’t spoken, tonight feels like date and she’s slightly confused. She considers texting Whit to ask for advice but don’t know exactly what to say, it’s not like they’ve done anything except sleeping in the same bed and cuddling on the couch during their movie nights, nothing weird doing that with your best friend, right? Before she makes action of her thoughts, Ali enters the kitchen, dressed in the black dress she bought the other day and Ashlyn is happy she has the beer in her hand since her mouth goes completely dry, just as in the dressing room. She takes a sip of the beverage and clears her throat.

“Wow Ali, you look amazing” she says as she stands up. She can feel the brunette’s eyes scanning over her own body, dressed in a pair of black loose fitting skinny jeans, a white button up shirt with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows and a red scarf tied around her neck.

“You don’t look to bad yourself, I like the scarf” Ali says with a smile, “Are you ready to go?” she asks as she picks her purse up, checking for her most important belongings.

“Me? I’ve been ready for half an hour, how about you?” the blonde teases as they walk towards the door.

“Shut up Harris, a girl has to do what a girl has to do. Look good, feel good, play good” she says with a smirk, and wink, before walking out in front of the blonde, giving her a perfect view of how the dress grasps around her body, ending in perfectly toned legs.

Ashlyn swallows hard, trying to keep the tone light when she answers, “Whatever you say princess. Let’s get going, I’m starving”, and with that, they are leaving the building for their last night together.

 

Dinner is fantastic and they are enjoying their night at a table somewhat aside, giving them some privacy. When their plates are empty they continue to talk about anything and everything. Never has a conversation been as easy as it is between these two women. The time flies by and all of a sudden it’s time to leave for the club. Ali insists of paying for dinner since it is Ashlyn’s last night in Frankfurt, much to the blonde’s protest. They are having a tiny argument which ends whit Ali walking away from Ashlyn, giving the blonde a smirk over her shoulders as she’s showing herself off once again. The taller woman shakes her head with a smile before she follows the brunette out in the quite chilly evening to walk the short distance to the club.

Once inside, Ali finds them a table while the blonde makes her way to the bar to order them something to drink.

“Two beers” she says to the bartender, a cute girl in her early twenties, who looks at her slightly confused. Ashlyn realizes she’s not talking English and holds up two fingers as she points at the beer tap.

“Oh, absolute hübscher” the girl says with a wink as she prepares the beverage. The blonde does not understand the compliment but it doesn’t matter because she has both her eyes and attention on the defender at the corner table and on her only. Suddenly Ali looks up, her eyes meeting Ashlyn’s and the blonde experience something that feels like a punch in her gut. She can’t look away, can’t take her eyes of the woman she calls her best friend, and she realizes she is on thin ice. When she has paid for the beer she walks over to Ali again and sits down next to her, all of a sudden nervous.

“Did she hit on you?” the brunette asks with a smile.

Ashlyn looks at her, confused before she answers, “What, who?”

“Wow, you really are that oblivion to all the girls undressing you with their eyes, aren't you?” Ali says laughing. “I’m talking about the bartender who couldn’t take her eyes of you even though I could see from her that she didn’t understand a word you were saying” she continues, still giggling.

“I don’t know what you are talking about” the blonde mutters, looking out over the dance floor instead of on the defender.

The brunette can feel the mood shift and leaves the conversation there, changing the subject to a safer one. “I want to dance, come on” she says, reaching out her hand for the blonde who, somewhat unwillingly, takes it and follows the defender out on the dance floor. To start with, Ashlyn tries to keep some space between them, not wanting to get to close, but Ali seems to want the opposite. She’s dancing up close to the keeper and gives her a challenging look before she turns around, pressing her back against the blonde’s body and Ashlyn can’t stop herself from placing her hands on the brunette’s hips. They are dancing like that for awhile before the music changes from club to a slow song and Ali turns back around, now facing Ashlyn. Before the blonde has a chance to realize what’s going on, the defender puts her arms around her neck and they are slow dancing close together. When the song ends, Ali gives the blonde a shy smile before taking her hand, leading her off of the dance floor back to their table.

“That was fun” she says, throwing herself down onto the chair, sweaty and exhausted from the heat on the dance floor.

“Yeah I guess it was” Ashlyn replies, taking a sip of what’s left of her beer. She’s feeling slightly uncomfortable but after a few more minutes the conversation flows as usual and she relaxes again, thinking the intimacy in Ali’s dance must come from the alcohol they’ve been drinking during the night.

After a few more beers as well as rounds on the dance floor, the night turns into early morning and they take a cab back to Ali’s apartment, both of them slightly buzzed from the alcohol. Once home, they get ready for bed and Ali slides down next to the blonde, just as every other night during their week together. Ashlyn is painfully aware of the brunette’s every curve as they are laying close together, the blonde as big spoon, holding her arms around the smaller women in front of her.

“You’re the best, you know that right?” Ali mumbles, half asleep.

Ashlyn chuckles as she answers, “You’re not too bad either princess” she says, squeezing the brunette a little harder for a moment. Ali find the blonde’s hand in the dark, tangling their fingers together and gives Ashlyn’s knuckles a kiss.

“Good night stud” she whispers, barely audible, before she immediately falls asleep in the arms of her favorite person.

 

When the morning comes, Ali wakes up with her head resting on the blonde’s chest and their legs tangled together. She lies there for a few minutes, smiling to herself as she listens to the heart beat of a woman who has become so incredibly important to her in a short amount of time. The most humble, caring, and loving woman she ever met, a woman she looks up to and respects endlessly. _A woman she loves_. The thought comes from nowhere and she becomes somewhat shocked, when did her feelings for the blonde change from friendly to loving? Because that what it is, she realize when she lies there. She doesn’t just love her as a friend; she actually has romantic feelings for her. She looks at the sleeping Ashlyn and smiles again, knowing it’s impossible not to love her. Everything from her childlike side, to the independent woman who was forced to grow up way too early and above all, the hardworking and very passionate soccer player are sides she truly admires. When she eventually gets restless, she manages to sneak out of bed without waking Ashlyn up. She makes her way to the kitchen to start breakfast, knowing how much the blonde loves sleeping in the morning.

Ashlyn wakes up after awhile and glances out over the empty bed, slightly disappointed that Ali isn’t there next to her. Soon enough, the smell of coffee reaches her and she immediately knows where she can find the brunette. After putting a pair of Nike shorts and a UNC shirt on, she walks out to the kitchen, finding Ali at the same spot as every morning during the last week, by the counter with a cup of coffee and a newspaper in front of her.

“Morning” she mumbles as she walks over to the coffee machine.

“Good morning” Ali says with a smile as the obviously tired keeper tries to save her eyes from the strong morning sun. “Did you sleep well?”

“Yeah, I didn’t even hear when you left the bed” the blonde answers while sitting down. “Are you done with the paper?” She tries to keep the conversation casual, not thinking about either the fact that her immediate instinct was to miss Ali’s warm body when she woke up, nor that today is the day when she’s flying back home to the states.

“Yes you can take it. I’m going for a shower while you finish your breakfast. There are pancakes under the plate by the stove” the brunette says before leaving the kitchen.

 

The morning goes by and Ashlyn packs her stuff up before they walk to grab lunch at the same Italian place as they visited the first evening. None of them brings up the subject that they only have a couple of hours left together but it affects their conversation. It doesn’t flow as easy as it usually does. Eventually it’s impossible to avoid it anymore.

“So, what are you going to do when you get home?” Ali asks.

“Well, we start up with practice again on Monday after the break and then we’ll play a friendly next weekend so I’ll stay busy with soccer. Has to be prepared for next camp you know” the blonde answers. “I heard there’s going to be a certain German living player there this time” she adds with a wink.

“Yeah, I’ll finally be allowed to travel home for camp, I’m really looking forward to it” the defender says with a dreamy gaze. “It’s been way too long since I saw the girls”.

“I bet. It’s going to be great having you around this time. Not that I haven’t enjoyed the last couple of camps but it will be more fun like this” Ashlyn says shyly with a shrug, well aware of the fact that the brunette didn’t mention her along with camp and the girls.

Ali just smiles as she tilts her head to the side. “You’re adorable Ash” she says, laying her hand on the blonde’s over the table.

Ashlyn looks at the woman in front of her with skepticism written all over her face. “Adorable? Me? You got to be joking Al” she says. “I’m NOT adorable…and don’t use that word in the same sentence as my name. My reputation might get hurt” the blonde continues with a grumpy face.  

“Whatever you say” Ali laughs at the keeper who looks, and acts, like a five year old kid.

 

At the airport they are, once again, having a hard time saying good bye. The only difference this time is that they now are so much closer than after their first camp together, which makes it even more difficult. Ashlyn has checked her bag in and they are standing outside the security.

“It’s only a month until we’ll see each other at camp in West Palm Beach princess, and then you’ll be home for good, right?” Ashlyn says as she can see how the defender is fighting for keeping the tears from rolling down her cheeks. Ali’s contract with FFC Frankfurt is about to end and the defender has made the decision not to come back after the World Cup. She wants to focus on the upcoming Olympics with the USWNT instead of heading back and forth over the Atlantic Ocean.

“I know, I just hate good byes’. Especially those on airports because they often mean you won’t see each other in awhile” Ali gives the blonde a weak smile before she leans in for a hug. “You need to get going, we don’t want you to miss your flight so you have to stay here with me” she mumbles into the keeper’s hair before she let go. The blonde drag her back in for a final hug before she turns around and walk towards the security line. Ali are staying and watching after her for a moment but she does not turn around. She doesn’t want the brunette to see her tears.

A MONTH LATER

Ali’s entering the hotel’s lobby as the last player to arrive for camp. The rest of the girls have been coming throughout the day but now it’s almost 2am and she is exhausted after a long day of traveling. She is welcomed by Pia, who gives her a room key and briefly fills her in on what they will be doing the following day, before she takes off towards her room with only one thing in her mind, sleep. This thought is however long gone when she sees who is sitting on the floor next to her door. A certain keeper has fallen asleep there while waiting for her to arrive. She let go of her belongings and squat down beside the blonde, placing a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“Ash, wake up” she whispers, not wanting to scare the sleeping beauty.

“I’m awake, I’m awake, I promise” Ashlyn mumbles as she’s trying to sit up straight, not fully aware of what is going on around her.

Ali’s laughing at the very much confused woman on the floor, now giving her shoulder a squeeze in comfort. “Take it easy stud, it’s only me”.

“Ali?” the blonde asks, rubbing her eyes in an attempt to focus on the brunette in front of her. She’s now conscious enough to be aware of the situation and she gives Ali a hug while they’re still on the floor. “I didn’t mean to fall asleep, I wanted to welcome you” she mutters.

“I know, but it really is late so I’m not surprised you couldn’t stay awake. For how long have you been sitting here?” the defender asks as she’s helping Ashlyn to her feet.

“A few hours maybe” she says as she shrugs. “Well, I’ll let you go to bed now. You must be exhausted and I just wanted to say hi when you came” she continues.

“Yeah I really am tired, but thank you for waiting, even though you fell asleep” the brunette teases. “I’ll see you for breakfast tomorrow morning” she says, gives the keeper a hug and turn towards her room and the waiting bed.

When the morning comes, Ali has to force herself out of bed with a little help from HAO, who she’s rooming with. The only thing that makes her leave the warmth under the blanket is the thought of coffee and once seated, next to Ashlyn, she lets the hot beverage slowly wake her up. When they’re finished, Pia and the rest of the staff enter the dining area and their head coach takes the floor.

“Good morning ladies” Pia says and the players become silent within seconds. “I’m glad to see you all here and as you know, we have a lot of hard work in front of us with the World Cup only a couple of months away” she continues as her eyes swipes over the 29 women in the room. “Today, we’ll take it easy; everyone will see the medical team for a checkup and then we’ll be going over some tactical things. No practice until tomorrow since many of you had a long travel day yesterday. There will, however, be strict curfew tonight at 10:30, those of you who are jet lagged has to adapt quickly”.

Ashlyn and Ali are leaving breakfast together as soon as the coaches has gone over the schedule for the next couple of days along with other important things such as media hours and the upcoming shoot for press pictures.

“Do you want to take a walk with me later?” Ashlyn asks shyly before they step into the elevator.

“Yeah of course, I have the medical check scheduled at 10am but when I’m done with that I’m free until the meeting” Ali looks at the blonde with a smile. “Just text me when you have time”.

“I have my checkup at 10:30 so I’ll let you know when I’m back at the hotel” Ashlyn says before they say good bye and leave for their respective rooms.

**Ash:** What are u up to? Im back now.

**Ali:** In my room, come up here.

Ashlyn quickly change and heads up the two floors to the brunette’s room. She knocks lightly and waits for a few seconds before the door opens and she is greeted by a smiling Ali. A smile Ashlyn has come to love, a smile that always lights her day up, no matter if it’s through the computer screen or in person. The way the defender crinkles her nose and squeezes her eyes together is for sure one of the most adorable things Ashlyn ever seen.

“Hi there” the defender says as she takes a step aside, letting her guest in. “HAO is still at the training center so we have the room for ourselves but if you still want to take a walk, we can do that. I know you asked for a walk but I’m up for anything, you can decide” Ashlyn looks at Ali who is standing in the middle of the small room, rambling nervously. “You decide” she repeats since the blonde didn’t answer her the first time.

“It doesn’t really matter but we can take a walk. It easier to talk that way” Ashlyn finally says with a shrug.

They leave the hotel and walk the short distance to a park nearby in silence. There is so much they both want to say, but neither of them knows how to begin. How do you tell your best friend, whom you’ve known for half a year, that you are in love with her? They are both confused in their own way, Ashlyn can feel a special connection between them, but for all she knows, Ali is straight which makes this whole situation much more complicated. Ali on the other hand, doesn’t know what to think about her feelings towards the blonde. She has never been with a woman, she hasn’t even had feelings for a woman for god sake, and here she is, trying to figure out what this means. However, even though they both walk in similar thoughts, no one is bringing it up. Instead they start talking about anything and everything. They haven’t seen each other in a month and even though they have had some sort of contact every day, sometimes only a couple of short text, other day’s hour long Skype conversations, it isn’t the same thing as talking to each other face to face. They spend nearly an hour alone without talking about anything important, they are just enjoying each other’s company, finally on the same side of the Atlantic Ocean again.

 

The camp went on and their days were filled with brutally rough practices, both on the soccer field and in the lifting room and since the goalkeepers did most of their practice on their own, the two women didn’t see each other nearly as much as they wanted to. After the first week they were all drained from the tough schedule and they were all looking forward to their weekend off. They were off from Friday night to Sunday afternoon and they immediately made planes. Most of the girls couldn’t wait for this opportunity to get out of their soccer gear and dress up; Ali was one of them, of course. They decided that everyone would grab dinner on their own and they would then get ready and meet up in the lobby before leaving for the club.

Ashlyn and Ali ordered room service to the brunette’s room since HAO had left with some of the other girls for a restaurant. Both the keeper and defender were asked to join them but they had politely declined in favor for spending some time together.

“So, did you spend time here in West Palm Beach when growing up?” Ali asks, aiming on the fact that Ashlyn’s home town, Satellite Beach, is located only a couple of hours north of where camp is.

“Nah, not really, we spent most of the time around home but I’ve been here a couple of times during the years,” the blonde answers. “The surfing isn’t as good here as it is up north and we wasn’t old enough to go out when I still lived there so there wasn’t many reasons for us to go down here,” she continues with a smile. They fall in a comfortable silence while enjoying the rest of their dinner before Ashlyn brings up a subject she’s been thinking about a lot the last couple of week.

“So, what are you going to do after the World Cup? Since you’re not going back to Frankfurt I mean?” she asks, extremely focused on the last pieces of rice in her food box, not willing to look at the brunette who remains silent for a little too long. She hopes the answer will be that the defender has decided to join a team in the WPS but she’s afraid to get her hopes up.

“Eeh-m, I don’t really know yet. One alternative is to sign with a team in the WPS, my agent is currently working on some options there and Frankfurt definitely wants me back. I made it clear that I’m not going to stay in Germany after the World Cup but they’ve offered me a new contract any way. A really good on,” she explains with a shrug. “It’s not an easy decision. I really love Germany and I’ve had such a good time there. I learned who I am as a soccer player as well as a person when I moved there after college and the country has given me so much”.

“So why don’t you accept the new contract offer?” Ashlyn asks, well aware of how much the brunette loves everything about Frankfurt, Germany and Europe.

“It’s not that easy. I’ve lived so far away from my friends and family for a long time now and I don’t want to miss out on too much. With everything that has happened with Kyle over the years, I want to be able to be a part of his life, as well as I want to spend more time with my parents. Also, with the Olympics next year, the situation with flying back and forth between the states and Germany isn’t optimal,” she continues. I’ll stay in the states now and prepare for the WWC, it feels like there is a big chance I’ll make the roster and I don’t want to be distracted by anything, absolutely not the future but at the same time, I need to make up my mind soon. Lastly, moving back here would mean you and I would live in the same country and I would love having my best friend around more often,” she finishes with a smile.

“I would really love having you on the right side of the ocean too, but I totally understand and when the time comes, you’ll make the right decision” Ashlyn says with a shy smile as she starts to clean up after their dinner. “I should go back to my room to get ready; the others should be back soon” she starts walking toward the door but stops and turns around “Can I come and pick you up here before we leave?” she asks.

“Yes, I would love that,” Ali says with a smile and then the blonde is gone.

 

An hour and a half later Ali’s finishing up her makeup when she’s interrupted by a knock. She applies a last touch of mascara before rushing over to the door where Ashlyn is waiting.

“Hi handsome” she says when she sees the blonde in her black jeans, gray bottom up and black bow tie. “Come on in, I’ll be done in a second” she continues as she turns around to walk back to the bathroom for a last look in the mirror. She does, however, turn back again when she realizes that the blonde didn’t follow her. Ashlyn is instead still standing in the hallway, astonished by the beautiful brunette and it’s not until the door almost shut close she snaps back to reality and takes a step forward to enter the room. She does it in the exact same moment as Ali walks the other way and they are colliding halfway through the door. The force makes the brunette fall backwards but luckily, Ashlyn catches her at the last second and they are all of a sudden standing close together, the blonde’s arms draped around the shorter women. The tension is touchable and none of them are saying a word, Ali still somewhat shocked from almost falling and the contact with Ashlyn does not make it better. Instead of letting go of each other, they are like frozen with their eyes looked together as in a staring contest. The first one moving is Ashlyn as her eyes leaves the brunette’s, glancing down at her lips instead and when she hear how Ali’s breath hitches, she makes a decision, it’s now or never. Before she can change her mind, she moves her hand from the brunette’s back and places it on her cheek, stroking her gently with the thumb back and forth, as she’s slightly leaning her head back. They are still moving in completely silence, the only sound coming from their breaths. Ashlyn leans in, now only an inch away from the brunette’s lips and when she stops, it’s to give her a chance to take a step back. To the blonde’s surprise, Ali does the opposite as she makes the final move, throwing her arms around Ashlyn’s neck and crashing their lips together. They are standing there, in the middle of the doorway, kissing each other slowly for awhile until Ashlyn guides Ali backwards into the room, shutting the door close with her foot. Her hands are now placed on Ali’s hips and she takes the opportunity to run them along her sides, up and then back down to the small of her back. Eventually, they both need some air and Ashlyn is the one breaking the kiss and when she takes a small step back to create some space between them, the only thing she can do is stare at the beautiful woman in front of her.

“Wow,” it’s no more than a whisper that comes over the brunette’s lips as she looks at Ashlyn with hazy eyes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading and for sticking with me. Feedback are always welcomed and I'd love to here what you think about the story!!


	5. You weren't there

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are getting more serious and it's time to travel to Germany for the World Cup.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm truly sorry for the delay, I've wanted to get this posted for weeks now but have had a hard time finishing it. The last month has been crazy with first the national championship with my soccer team, finals and then my family finally came from Europe to spend Christmas and New Years with me. However, here it is and I hope you'll like it. 
> 
> Also, Happy New Year guys, I hope you've had a good one and that 2016 will be even better. I can't wait for the Olympic Qualification games and later the Olympics in Rio (even tho I probably won't cheer for the U.S firsthand there).

Ali wakes up and finds her body tangled together with Ashlyn’s. She glances at the clock, it’s only 7:40 am, which means they don’t have to get up in another hour. She watches the blonde as she sleeps peacefully and she can’t do anything but smile, even in her sleep she’s the most beautiful human being the brunette ever seen. She is everything Ali ever wanted, without knowing it. She is smart and funny, loving and caring, hard working and dedicated, and she has a beautiful and big heart that definitely holds a piece of the brunette’s. She don’t know when it happened but sometimes between when they first met at the airport in Los Angeles and now, she has fallen madly in love with the blonde keeper. There is no point in denying it and even though everything is still new, she can’t see a future without Ashlyn in it.

While lying there, she realizes what day it is, her last day in the states before the USWNT leaves for Austria and pre-camp tomorrow. A camp, and then a World Cup, the blonde beside her won’t be a part of even though she gave exactly everything she had to get there. Ali’s thinking back to the moment nearly exact a month ago, two days after their camp in Florida ended, when the blonde received the call both of them hoped would never come.

MAY 2011

They left camp in West Palm Beach two days ago and are now staying at Ali’s mother’s place in Miami for a few days before next camp while she’s out of town. After the first kiss, halfway through camp, they tried to figure out what they were doing. Some days were easier than others and throughout the week, they went through all kind of different stages. First they ignoring each other for 28 hours because neither of them knew how to handle the situation, when the silence finally became unbearable, they talked it out and decided to “go with the flow”, which meant they took every chance they got to sneak away for make-out sessions. They became quite familiar with the staircase to say the least. The last couple of days, they both became unsure again when they realized that camp was almost over. What would they be to each other outside of the hotels safe walls? The uncertainties drove them both crazy and they agreed on spending the few days off together and see where things headed from there.

 

They are cuddling on the couch, watching a movie, when the blonde’s phone starts buzzing on the table. She reaches over to answer but freezes when she sees who is calling.

“It’s Pia,” she says with a look at Ali over her shoulder.

“Then you should answer,” the brunette simply replies with a smile.

As she didn’t hear what she said, Ashlyn continues, “This is it, it will be a yes or a no, I don’t think I’m ready.”

“Of course you are. This is what you’ve been fighting for so pick up the phone before she hangs up,” Ali says.

The blonde hesitates for another moment before she slides the answer button to the right.

When she hangs up, only a minute later, her whole world has fallen apart. Pia has called her to give her a no; she called to destroy the blonde’s dream. She was not going to Germany with the rest of the USWNT, she was the fourth goalkeeper, simply not good enough. Ali understands where the call is heading as soon as their head coach starts speaking on the other end of the line; she witness the exact moment when the light in Ashlyn’s eyes goes out. She can see when everything she fought so hard for is taken away from her. When the phone call ends, the keeper leaves the couch and walks towards the door. Without as much as a look at Ali, nor a word, she opens it, steps outside and closes it gently.

The brunette is left on the couch and the meaning of what just happened slowly hits her. She becomes slightly scared of the blonde’s reaction, especially the silence. She would have preferred anger and screaming instead of her just walking away. Tears are filling her eyes, and they are threatening to fall over as she debating with herself whether she should follow Ashlyn or not. A part of her understands that she might need some space but most of her just wants to hold her, hug her tightly and tell her that everything will be okay. She wants to tell the hard working and talented keeper that her time will come, that this is not the end, and that she has many years on the field in front of her. But she also knows that those words won’t mean anything right now, nothing she says can ease the pain and disappointment the blonde is feeling.

Instead of chasing after her, Ali gives her some space and 45 minutes later she can hear how the front door opens and closes. She’s sitting in the kitchen, waiting, and it doesn’t take many seconds before Ashlyn enters the room. Her eyes are still as empty but Ali can see that she hasn’t cried and since she’s not completely sure what they are to each other, she waits for the blonde to come to her, not wanting to make the situation any worse than it already is.

When Ashlyn’s eyes finally meet the brunette’s, she cracks down and within a heartbeat, Ali is next to her, catching her before she falls. She’s holding her tightly as the broken keeper sobs silently.

“Sssshh, it’s going to be okay,” Ali says as she gently rubs her back. “Everything is going to be just fine.”

“I-I was n-not g-gg-going to c-cry,” the blond manage to say between sobs. “I-I’m okay, I just have to...” she leaves the sentence hanging as she pulls away from the brunette who’s not letting her go just yet.

“No Ash, you’re not and it’s totally okay. You have every right to be sad and angry and I will be here in the meantime,” she says as she holds Ashlyn by her wrists. “If you want me to cry with you, I’ll do that. If you want me to hate on Pia together with you, I’ll do that. If you just want me to hold you, I’ll definitely do that. I don’t know exactly what we are, you and me, but the one thing I know for sure is that I’m here right now and I’ll do exactly what you want and need me to do.”

The blonde has calmed down but with those words, she starts to sob again. “You can’t hate on Pia because you have a spot on the roster for the World Cup so you better stay on good terms with that woman,” she says and wipes the tears that has stopped falling as abrupt as they started.

Ali freezes in the middle of a movement, her hand on its way to the blonde’s cheek. “I-I have w-what?” she stutters, eyes wide open.

“You are going to Germany Al, so don’t piss Pia off because I want to see you play in the World Cup” the blonde says with a shrug and a smile. “She told me before we hung up, her exact words was _Since I’m confident that you have Alexandra Krieger by your side this very moment, would you do me the favor and congrats her on a spot on the roster for the World Cup, thank you_ ,” the blonde says, with quite a good imitation of their head coach, and now with an even bigger smile on her face.

“Oh. My. God. I’m going to Germany,” Ali whispers, slightly in shock even though she knew the odds were in her favor.

“Yes you are, and even though it sucks that I’m not coming with you, I’m so proud of you for making the roster and I don’t want to spend this short amount of time we have together crying or being angry. We should celebrate instead,” the blonde says, pulling the defender in for a hug.

 

Ali snaps back to reality as the blonde starts to stir beside her. “Good morning beautiful,” she says and gives her a quick peck on the lips.

“Good morning to you too,” Ashlyn mumbles with a smile, still not fully awake.

Ali is watching the blonde as she becomes more conscious and it hits her that before Ashlyn, she could never imagine herself being so happy about waking up next to someone. The only problem at the moment is that she still doesn’t know what they are for each other. It’s just a little over a month since their first kiss, a month they mostly spent apart except for a few days here and there and this last week, which they have spent together in New York since Ali finally got some well deserved vacation before leaving for Europe. They haven’t done anything more than sleeping in the same bed, yet. A few make-out sessions on the couch has become quite heated but they have both stopped it before doing anything any of them would regret. They have some sort of silent agreement on taking it slow and not rush things, even though they both are having a hard time keeping their hand of off each other’s bodies.

After cuddling for awhile, Ali leaves the bed to start breakfast and it doesn’t take many minutes before Ashlyn joins her. Not to help as much as keeping her company. Ashlyn can see that she’s nervous, but gives her a few more minutes to start talking. When she doesn’t, she walks over to her where she stands by the stove, takes the bowl of eggs she’s holding from her and sets it down on the counter.

“What are you thinking about?” she asks and wraps her arms around her neck, pulling her in for a hug.

“Eeh-m nothing special, why?” Ali says into the blonde’s chest.

“Alexandra Blaire Krieger, I know you well enough to see when something is going on inside that pretty head of yours,” Ashlyn respond as she let go of the brunette.

“Well, I’m just thinking I guess, about stuff you know. The World Cup, us, that kind of things,” Ali finally admits with a shrug after Ashlyn’s been staring at her for awhile.

“Okay, then we should talk about it. Whatever thoughts you have, tell me about them and we’ll solve it together,” Ashlyn says as she gently strokes the brunette’s cheek.

“Please Ash, can’t we just enjoy our last day together. I don’t want to talk about the future; I don’t think I’m ready for that. What if we, you and me, aren’t on the same page? I can’t leave knowing that you won’t be here waiting for me to come home, I can’t go and play in the World Cup knowing that you won’t be my biggest supporter no matter what. For God sake Ash, I’m not ready for the future,” Ali finally breathes and stops rambling.

“Okay okay jeez Alex, listen to me. I just don’t want you to leave for Europe without us talki…” the blonde begins but leaves the sentence hanging when she sees the look on Ali’s face. “What, did I say something wrong?” she asks, slightly confused.

“You called me Alex,” the brunette says. “You never call me Alex.”

“Oh shit, I’m sorry. I didn’t even realize I did it,” Ashlyn replies. “I won’t do it again if you don’t like it,” she continues, still confused that a simple nickname had that effect on Ali.

“No it’s not like that. It’s just that no one outside of my family ever calls me Alex, it’s always Ali or Al but I kind of like it when you do,” Ali says with a shy smile. “I was just surprised I guess.”  

“So what you actually say is that Alex is reserved for the ones closest to you?” the blond says with a teasing smirk on her face as she sees Ali’s cheeks turn red.

“Oh shut it Harris,” the brunette responds with a smile. “But yes, that’s what I’m saying, and that’s what you are to me, which scares the hell out of me,” she continues as she wraps her arms around the blondes neck and gives her a kiss. "Which leads us back to where we were,” she says when she let go of Ashlyn. “I’m sorry and I agree, we should talk about this, us, before I’m leaving.”

“Now?” the blonde asks.

“Yeah why not,” Ali says with a shrug.

“Okay, but you know for me, it’s not that hard. For me, you’re the one. This might be new, and I’m totally fine with taking it slow, but I’m not going anywhere. I’ll be watching every single game you play in Germany, cheering on you as I was there, and I will definitely be here and waiting for you to come home. This is it for me; you are my person, my best friend, my partner in crime, my soul mate. You are my special one, Ali,” Ashlyn says as it’s the most obvious thing in the world.

By now, the brunette’s cheeks are streaked with tears and she has to clear her throat before she speaks and when she does, she has to fight to keep her voice steady. “Ashlyn Michelle Harris, you’re the most amazing and beautiful human being I’ve ever met. I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve having you by my side.”

“You are you and that’s enough, you haven’t done anything, I’m the lucky one,” Ashlyn says gently before she wipes the brunette’s tears away. “I’m the lucky one,” she repeats, leaning her forehead against Ali’s.

After a moment in silence, Ali breaks the contact, takes a step back and looks the blonde in the eyes. “Okay, so now when that’s sorted, are we like…you know…you and me…I mean would you like to…”she stumbles over the words, now looking down at her feet, without finishing the sentence.

Ashlyn watches the brunette as her cheeks becomes red, and she can’t help herself from smiling at the obviously flustered woman in front of her. “Ali, is this you trying to ask me to be your girlfriend?” she asks softy and if Ali’s cheeks was red before, it’s nothing compared to what they become after the blonde’s question.

The brunette feels stupid, she desperately wants to say the words out loud but she can’t. Instead she hides her face in Ashlyn’s chest and doesn’t care about the fact that it’s a somewhat childish move. The blonde only laughs at her, a nervous and blushing Ali is one of the cutest things she knows and instead of teasing her or pushing her to say something, Ashlyn just holds the smaller woman for awhile, kissing her head gently. She eventually takes a step back and cups Ali’s face with her hands, forcing her to meet her eyes. “Alex, we started out as friends but to be honest, our feelings towards each other have never been just friendly. You’re beautiful, smart, honest, kind, unbelievably amazing, and I’m head over heels for you. So, what do you think about being my girlfriend?” she says with a smile.

The brunette doesn’t respond verbally at first, instead she kisses Ashlyn deeply, trying to show her all the feelings she has. When she finally speaks, she can’t keep a smile away. “Yes Ash, yes. I would definitely love that.” They’re kissing for a few more moments before Ali speaks once again. “I still want to take it slow though so can we wait with telling the girls? I just feel that we don’t need any extra pressure on this, us, right now.”

“That’s totally fine with me, I don’t care so whatever you want is okay with me” Ashlyn replies. “I’m just so glad that you are mine.”

 

They spend their last day together doing nothing more than enjoying the company of each other but when the evening comes, they decide on going out for dinner. Ali takes as usual forever to get ready but Ashlyn is not one to complain because when she’s finally done, the brunette takes her breath away, as always. She’s the most gorgeous human being Ashlyn ever seen and she can’t understand what she has done to be lucky enough to walk in to the restaurant with the one and only Alexandra Krieger by her arm. During the whole dinner, she can’t take her eyes of her and Ali quickly becomes aware of the blonde’s gaze. There’s a fire in her eyes as she study the brunette’s every move.

“Ash, my eyes are up here,” Ali says with a smirk when the blonde’s eyes have been fixated at her cleavage a little too long. They’ve finished their meals awhile ago and are now sipping on what wine they have left in their glasses.

“Uuh-m I’m sorry,” Ashlyn responds as her cheeks turns red and she immediately moves her eyes to meet the brunette’s. “My mind was wandering.”

“Oh I see, I wonder where,” Ali continues to tease with a laugh and wink.

Ashlyn, who knows exactly what the brunette are trying to do, will not be any less and leans forward until she can whisper in Ali’s ear, without anyone else hearing, “I already know what that body looks like without clothes on babe,” she says seriously and she can feel how the brunette tense up. She leans back again, now with a grin on her face.

Ali’s eyes are wide open as she looks at the blonde in front of her. She clears her throat both once and twice before speaking, somewhat shaky, “Pay. Now. We’re going home.”  

Ashlyn isn’t late to follow the brunette’s order and a few minutes later, they’re seated in a cab on their way back to the apartment, both of them having a hard time keeping their hands of off the other. When they arrive to the apartment, Ashlyn gives the key to the brunette, pays the driver with bills, leaving him a generous amount of tip, before she hurries after Ali who’s already on her way inside.

They are kissing none-stop in the elevator and when reaching the right floor, the brunette’s hands are shaking slightly as she tries to unlock the door to the apartment and after a few failed attempts, they’re finally in. Ali steps in first but don’t come long before she’s grabbed by the wrist and forced to turn around, facing the blonde. She stares straight into Ashlyn’s eyes and she can feel her heart racing as the blonde moves her hands from Ali’s wrists to her hips, running them slowly along her sides. Ali grabs Ashlyn’s shirt to bring her closer, placing her hands on her chest when she’s satisfied with the distance before she slides them up to hook behind the blonde’s neck. Their eyes are still locked together, daring each other to make the next move. Surprisingly, it’s Ali who takes the final step as she closes the gap between their faces, crashing their lips together. She kisses the blonde tenderly, biting her bottom lip lightly before deepen the kiss. A moan escapes the blonde but before things goes too far, she takes control and puts herself in charge as she closes the still open door with her left foot and turning them both around, pressing the brunette’s back against the door.

Their lips are only separated for a moment, immediately finding their way back to each other and when they do, Ali’s tongue is begging for entrance. Ashlyn isn’t late to welcome her and their tongues are slowly dancing together for a few minutes. Eventually, they both need air and Ashlyn is the one breaking the kiss. She’s breathing heavily as she takes in the sight of the brunette in front of her. “Let’s go to the bedroom,” she whispers before she leans in for another kiss and simply lifts the smaller women up, placing her on her hips. Ali wraps her legs around Ashlyn’s waist as she guide them through the apartment to the bedroom and to give her better vision, Ali breaks the kiss, moving her lips to the blonde’s neck.

She places kisses along her jaw line, ending up right below her right ear, a move that makes the blonde moan once again and she tightens her grip around the brunette’s tights. They’ve reach the bedroom door, which Ashlyn manages to shove open despite holding Ali. Before Ashlyn lowers the brunette down on the bed, she puts her down and turns her around in one simple move. She collects her hair, moves it to one side and starts to place kisses along her neck as she starts to unzip her. “We need to get you out if this dress babe,” she mumbles into the brunette’s ear and Ali is shivering; both from the air that all of a sudden hits her body when her dress falls to the floor as well as from Ashlyn’s breath against her skin. Ashlyn continues to place kisses, tracing her neck down to her shoulder before she’s turning her around once again. She lifts her up, lowers her down on her back and hovers over her, her stomach flutters by the sight of the now almost naked woman underneath her. Ali pulls her down, locking their lips together and starts to undo the blonde’s button up shirt, craving to touch her bare skin.

“Take…it….of,” she manages to get out between kisses and the blonde isn’t late to satisfy her, sitting up over the brunette, finishing the unbuttoning herself before she throws the shirt behind her.

Instead of leaning down immediately, Ashlyn stays sitting, taking in the view in front of her where Ali is lying, wearing noting more that a lacy black thong with a matching bra. “Gosh Al, you are so incredible beautiful,” she says, unable to stop staring.

Ali blushes slightly but instead of saying anything, she pulls the blonde down on top of her again to continue their kiss. This time, it’s Ashlyn who eventually breaks it, moving her lips to the brunette’s collarbone, nibbling her gently before she travels up to the spot where she can feel Ali’s pulse racing underneath her fragrant skin.

“Oh my god Ash,” Ali moans, griping tighter around the blonde. Her hands have now traveled down and are tugging on the waistband of the Ashlyn’s jeans but the wine, as well as her feeling slightly nervous about the situation, has made her hands somewhat uncoordinated and they are fumbling with the buttons. Ashlyn takes the hint and takes over once again, finishing the buttons and kicking the pants off in one swift and easy motion, without losing contact with Ali.

“Better?” she asks with a smile against Ali’s lips.

“Mmm-hmm,” the brunette confirms, also smiling.

“Good. I still think you have too much cloths on though,” Ashlyn says when she kisses the top of her perfectly rounded breast and moves her right hand to underneath Ali in order to undo her bra. She lets out a groan when she removes it and lifts her head up to give herself a better look at the woman beneath her, she’s pure beauty. She then allows her mouth to travel down the brunette’s body until she reaches her now uncovered breasts. While letting her thumb circles around the left nipple, she takes the right one in her mouth, pulling gently on it with her teeth before she let her tongue circles around it, a move that makes Ali gasping in pleasure and she grabs the sheets with both her hands.

Sex has always been easy to Ashlyn, the women have been lined up, fighting for her attention and she has enjoyed giving them a night to remember. But that’s also all it has been, on-night stands. No commitments and no feelings, just sex. This time, everything is different. For the first time in her life, she’s hopelessly in love with the woman underneath her and she’s taken aback by how much she’s trembling when her hand travels down to pull off the brunette’s black thong. She desperately wants this night to be something special for Ali.

She’s moving herself up again to capture Ali’s lips with her own for a moment while she trails her hand down to her tights. They are both in this together but before moving any further, Ashlyn looks into Ali’s eyes for a beat or two, waiting for her approval nod. When it comes, her breath is heavy and she looks at the blonde with a fire in her gaze.

“Pleas Ash,” she mumbles before she closes her eyes.

That’s all Ashlyn needs and she’s been waiting way too long for this moment to drag it out any longer. Her hand finds the brunette’s center and when her fingers finally run through her folds, Ali bucks her hips to meet the blonde’s hand. Without any warning, Ashlyn slips another finger into Ali who moans lightly; eyes opens slightly to meet the blondes.  

“You’re so wet babe,” Ashlyn mumbles as she can see the brunette fight to not lose control over her own body. “So wet,” she repeats before she pulls back.

Ashlyn kisses the brunette down her body, only stopping when she reaches her hip and she has to hold her down as she kisses towards her center, tracing her inner tight. Ali is a woman full of surprises, her calm and often shy personality is long gone and the energy and power she shows on the soccer field is instead carried over to the bed. She is wild and when the blonde’s tongue finally slides through her folds, she’s nowhere nearly prepared, “Oh my God,” she manage to say and when Ashlyn hit’s her clit, Ali loses the last string if control and arches her back. “Fuck Ash, harder,” she says under her breath.

The blonde isn’t late to obey her and takes the hard clit in her mouth, sucking on it for a few seconds before she let go and continues to lick the brunette up and down, her tongue working fast and covering every inch of Ali’s center before concentrating on circling in her tight heat. The brunette is struggling against the hand holding her down and the pleasure of feeling Ashlyn tongue against her core makes her expose her vulnerable throat as she throws her head back on the pillow, moaning the blonde’s name loudly.

When Ashlyn once again shifting focus, she’s leaving her place between the brunette’s legs and works her way back up to her lips. She’s kissing her deeply as she slips two fingers into her and rubs slow circles over her clit with her right hand while the left one is grabbing Ali’s tight, holding her down against the bed. She’s close now and every thrust from the blonde’s hand makes Ali shiver, her moans and heavy breathing are filling the room and her hips are jerking weakly to meet the blonde’s thrusts.

“Come for me babe,” Ashlyn whispers into the brunette’s ear and those words, along with the blonde’s breath on her bare skin, becomes too much and Ali’s body starts trembling as she falls over the edge. She comes with wave after wave, her body arching under the blonde who continues to stroke her through her height.

“Ashlyn..Ashlyn..” she mumbles into the blonde’s neck as the orgasm runs through her body before she finally relaxes again, her limbs only shuddering slightly in the after wave of the orgasm.

Ashlyn pulls out and kisses her slowly as her hands roams up and down over the now calm body beneath her. She withdraws from the brunette’s lips when she can feel her smiling.

“Wow… that was…” Ali says shyly after a few minutes but leaves the sentence hanging as her hands starts to roam over Ashlyn, who’s still on top of her. Even though the blonde is the strongest one of the two of them, Ali can without any bigger problems turn them around so she’s the one on top. She’s slowly tracing Ashlyn’s jaw line with kisses before looking her in the eyes with a smirk on her lips.

“Now you’re all mine baby,” she whispers into the blonde’s ear as her hands starts to travel down her muscular body, finding the waistband of Ashlyn’s boxer briefs, slowly taking them off.

 

Several hours later, when they are cuddling together in the big bed, both of them exhausted and close to fall asleep, Ali’s laying with her head on the blonde’s chest and her arm thrown over her waist. She’s been quiet for a while but suddenly her grip around the waist tightens.

“What?” Ashlyn mumbles into her hair.

“Nothing,” the brunette answers but Ashlyn can hear it’s something she’s thinking about.

“Are you sure? You know you can tell me everything, right?” she continues to push carefully.

“Yeah of course, it’s just that…it’s so silly,” Ali whispers shyly and by those words, she has the blonde’s full attention.

“Babe, nothing is too silly to tell me. But if you don’t want to talk about it now, we can wait until tomorrow or whenever you are ready,” she says as she holds the smaller woman tighter.

Ali’s quiet for a while before she takes a deep breath. “I’ve never been with a woman before,” she whispers shyly without daring to look Ashlyn in the eyes. “You’re my first.”

The blonde chuckles lightly and puts a finger under Ali’s cheek, forcing their eyes to meet. “You could have fooled me,” she says with a smile before she gives the brunette a quick peek on the lips.

“Stooooop it Ash,” Ali whines as she buries her now red cheeks against the blonde’s chest again. “I’m actually trying to be serious here,” she continues.

“I’m sorry, but so was I and to be honest, I don’t really care if this was your first or hundredth time with a woman. The only thing that matter when we are together is you and me, nothing or nobody else,” she says with such confidence that Ali can’t resist smiling. “Even though I’m sort of proud to be your first,” she continued with a smirk.

“You’re amazing Ash, I can’t believe how I got this lucky,” Ali says as she snuggle closer to the blonde, slowly drifting off into a peaceful slumber.

 

10 JULY 2011

Ashlyn and Whitney are watching the quarter final against Brazil at the keepers place in New York and they’ve just seen Abby tie the game with an incredible header in the very last minute, 120+2 to be more exact. They have seen the girls come together, getting organized for the penalty kicks, and they’ve seen Boxxy, Carli, Abby and Pinoe all score as well as Hope making an outstanding save.

“Who’s taking the last one?” Whit asks as the Brazilian player scores on their fourth PK.

“I don’t know but I would guess Rampone or Tobs,” Ashlyn replies before her eyes go wide and she chokes on her beer when she sees who’s leaving the team in the mid-circle, walking towards the 18 yard box, the one and only Alexandra Krieger. “Oh my lord, I can’t watch this,” she continues. She stands up and starts pacing back and forth in the living room as she sees the defender placing the ball on the PK spot.

“Ash, you have to watch,” Whitney says. “You can’t miss Ali taking the final PK; she will kill you if you do.” Luckily for Ashlyn, Whitney knows about her and Ali. She’s the only one, except from Kyle, who knows that they are now more than friends.

With that being said, Ashlyn stops pacing in front of the TV and placing her hands over her eyes, watching what’s happening on the field in Germany through her fingers. “I guess I’ll die anyway then because watching this will probably kill me too,” she says, watching the cameras zooming in on the defenders concentrated face as she takes off towards the ball.

“YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESSSS, SHE DID IT,” Ashlyn screams when the ball hits the net behind the goalkeeper and Ali starts running back to her celebrating teammates. “SHE DID IT, THAT’S MY GIRL!!!!!” she continues, now jumping up and down in excitement. “Where’s my phone? I have to text her.”

**Ash:** WHAAAAAAAAAAAT A PK!!!! That’s how a champ does it, SO very proud of you girl. Please give me a call when you’re back at the hotel. Love you xx.

Three hours later, Ali finally calls and they spend a few minutes talking about the game in general, Abby’s header and the PK’s. Ashlyn can hear how tired the defender is so they soon say good bye and decide to talk the next day instead.

 

17 JULY 2011

It’s over. The 2011 World Cup in Germany is officially over and Ashlyn and Whitney are sitting at the same couch as they did a week earlier, staring at the TV where they can see Japan celebrate as world champions. This was not how it was supposed to end. After the heroic win against Brazil in the quarterfinal, everyone thought that the trophy would go to the U.S. They did what they had to in the semifinal, and beat France with 3-1 advancing to the final where they would defeat a technically skilled Japan as a strong unit. However, after 120 minutes, they found themselves tied once again and just as in the game against Brazil, it came down to PK’s. Unfortunately, this time, nothing went right and Boxxy, Carly and Tobs all missed their PK’s. It didn’t help that Abby scored because Ali never got the chance to take the final one because by then, it was already over. None of them are saying a word; there is simply nothing to say. Instead they are sitting next to each other in silence with the TV still on, now watching their crying friends accepting their silver medals; all of them looks completely defeated which isn’t a surprise. Being the second best is never good enough; it is worth just as much as end up at the last place. You’re a loser no matter what.

Later that evening, when it’s in the middle of the night in Germany, Ashlyn’s phone starts buzzing on the counter with an incoming Facetime call from Ali. She slides the answer button to the right and takes a deep breath before speaking. “Hi babe,” she says gently, not knowing in what state or mood the defender are.

“Hi…” Ali replies quietly.

Not knowing what to say, Ashlyn stays quiet, waiting for the brunette to continue. It takes a while but eventually she does. “It was not suppose to end this way,” Ali says before she breaks down completely. The only thing Ashlyn can hear is Ali crying and it breaks her heart not being able to be there for her to ease the pain.

“I know Ali, I know that it sucks and I know that it will suck for a long time. I also know that this is not what you want to hear, but the only thing you can do right now is to be angry and sad and then use those feelings to get back on track, even stronger,” the blonde knows that it’s just words but she has to say something and the best way is probably to piss Ali off and get her to look into the future instead of at the silver medal.

Ali does not respond immediately but when she does, she still sounds broken. “I wish you were here with me Ash, I wish you were here because there’s nothing I want to do as much as hug you right now. You always know what I need and when I need it the most, you’re always on the other side of the world,” she is now crying again and if Ashlyn’s heart broke before, it now breaks all over again and she has to fight to keep her own tears away.

“It’s just a few more days and then you’ll be back in the states,” she says in an attempt to give some sort of comfort to the defender.

 

Ali is having a hectic schedule thanks to a lot of media events with the USWNT after the World Cup as well as a big family to visit and spend time with, it’s not until two weeks after her arrival stateside she finds the time to see Ashlyn, who’s everything but happy about the brunette’s priorities. They are both happy to see each other but they are also having a hard time not to fight over stupid things. Eventually, one of those small arguments escalades and a full-blown fight breaks out between them.

Ashlyn is tired of Ali’s negative attitude toward everything that involves soccer. She refuses to talk about her future, refuses to discuss which teams in the WPS that could be interesting and even though Ashlyn is begging her to talk, she ignores the fact that she don’t have a club, that she’s unemployed. The blonde tries everything but eventually it becomes too much and she can’t take it any longer.

“What do you want me to do Ali? You haven’t been yourself since you got back from Germany. You don’t talk to me anymore. For God sake, you don’t even look at me. What have I done?” Ashlyn is close to tear when she makes a last attempt to reach through the brunette’s walls.

“You haven’t done anything Ash, but you have to understand that it’s been tough since the loss. I’m disappointed and I don’t want to think about soccer or my future right now. I need to let all of this sink in before I can make any decision,” Ali says with a sigh.

“Of course it tough, you lost the World Cup final, what did you expect,” the blonde says and throws her arms out. “You’ve changed Ali, the loss changed you, I don’t even know who you are anymore,” she continues, now with tears in her eyes. “I’ve been cheering on you every single game. I’ve been available every hour of the day for you to call me, whether you want to talk about soccer or anything else. I’ve been here and waiting for you to come home, so I finally can hold you in my arms again. It doesn’t matter that you lost Ali, I’m still so incredibly proud of you but I don’t know what to do when you shutting me out.”

“It doesn’t matter?? OF COURSE IT MATTERS!” she brunette are now crying. “You wasn’t there, how can you possibly understand any of this,” she continues but regret her words at the same moment as they leaves her lips and she sees the disappointment in Ashlyn’s eyes.

“You’re right I wasn’t there, and I’m sorry for trying to be here and supporting my girlfriend. I’m so very sorry for that and for caring Ali, it must be hard for you having someone that cares about you,” Ashlyn says with hurt in her voice before she turns around, picks her car keys up and leaves the apartment.  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading. Again, I hope you liked it and feedback are as always appreciated.


	6. She left

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Everything is turned up side down when Ali leaves for Germany...without telling Ashlyn.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's the next chapter. I hope you like it. Even though I'm trying to do my research and follow some sort of realistic time line, it's still just a fiction and I'm taking the liberty to make the story match my own ideas as well.

It’s mid-September and Ashlyn are sitting at Whitney’s place, drinking a beer, with tears streaming down her cheeks.

“I still can’t believe she’s gone,” she whispers quietly as she’s shaking her head in disbelief.

She left and moved back to Germany.

She left.

“I know Ash, I know and it sucks but it’s over a month now and I think the best thing you can do is to move on. Ali’s in Germany and you are not together anymore,” Whitney says, rubbing her hand in slow circles over the blonde’s back.

“Yeah but you know as well as I do that if it was up to me, we would still be together,” Ashlyn answers while whipping the tears of her cheeks. Whitney doesn’t answer; instead she pulls the keeper in for a tight hug.

 

AUGUST 2011

After their fight, Ashlyn drives around for a couple of hours without any specific destination as a goal. She drives and she let her mind wanders, pretty soon regretting losing her temper over minor details. Deep down, she understands why Ali acts as she did and she wishes she had been more patient and understanding.

3 hours later she’s parking her car outside of her apartment building, waiting a few moments to walk upstairs in an attempt to calm herself down. She wants to make things right with Ali and she can’t risk losing it again, especially not over stupid things. When she opens her door she can immediately feel that something isn’t right, it’s too quiet and all the things Ali has spread out all over the living room in the few days she has been there are gone. One the counter she finds a note.

_I’m sorry. – Ali_

She reaches for her phone right away and calls the brunette but it goes straight to voice mail. She hangs up before the beep and sits down on the couch, tears streaming down her face as she realizes that Ali’s gone.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck..” she repeats to herself, hiding her face in her hands as she’s starts to sob more heavily.

 

Over the next couple of days she tries to call multiple times without any luck, and Ali has disappeared from the internet and all social media. It’s not until three days later she gets a notification from Twitter; Ali has been tagged in a tweet.

Congratulation on re-signing with FFC Frankfurt @alexbkrieger

– U.S Soccer WNT (@ussoccer_wnt), August 7, 2011

Ashlyn are starring at her phone, reading the short tweet over and over again, _Frankfurt, she’s going back to Germany,_ she thinks and starts to panic. Before she can do anything else her phone starts buzzing and Whitney’s face are showing up on the screen.

“Hi Whit,” she says slowly when she answers.

“What the hell are Ali doing, hadn’t she decided to stay state side and play so you guys could be closer?” Whitney almost yells and Ashlyn has to take the phone away from her ear to prevent becoming deaf.

“I-I don’t know,” she stutters. “W-We had…we had a fight and she...left. I haven’t talked to her since,” she says quietly as tears starts falling down her cheeks. “I don’t know Whit and it scares the hell out of me.”

“Wait, what? You had a fight and she left for Germany?” Whitney says, sounding slightly confused.

“No…or yes…apparently. We had a fight a few days ago, I left the apartment for a few hours and when I got back she was gone, the only thing left was a note saying “I’m sorry”. I’ve tried to call her every day but she hasn’t picked up,” she answers with desperation in her voice. “She hasn’t said a word about Germany to me, not since before we…you know, became more than friends.”

Whitney can hear the sadness in the blonde’s voice and it breaks her heart. She loves Ali but right now, she could kill her for doing this to her best friend. No one deserves happiness as much as Ashlyn Harris and Whitney really though that Ali was the one. They are perfect for each other, too stubborn for their own good from time to time but leaving and going back to Germany when things get a little hard? She definitely didn’t think that about the brunette.

“You want me to come over?” she says, offering Ashlyn her company.

“Nah, I’m good, I think I want to be alone right now. Can I call you tomorrow?” Ashlyn answer quietly.

“Of course, you can call me at any time. Let me know if you change your mind. I’m only minutes away.”

 

A few hours south of New York, Ali is in the middle off packing up all her stuff; her plane is leaving for Frankfurt the next morning and she’s on the phone with Kyle.

“Ali, you know I love and support you but are you really sure about this?” he says and the concern in his voice is obvious. “If this is what you want I’m happy for you but something is telling me it has more to do with Ash than your own happiness,” he continues.

Ali sight and are quiet for a moment, thinking about whether or not she should tell the truth, and when she finally answers him, she chooses the later. “For the hundredth time Kyle, yes I’m sure. I love Germany and I need to go back. I can’t stay here after everything that happened and I can definitely not end my journey over there with a loss in the World Cup final. I have to do this, for me,” she says and forces herself to sound as convincing as possible. The truth is, she’s anything but sure. She’s scared that she might be making the biggest mistake of her life.

The signing did, however not come from nowhere. After the final, Frankfurt contacted her immediately and told her they were absolutely serious with wanting her back, offering her an even better contract than the one offered earlier in the spring. Along with that, she had multiple options around the rest of Europe, as well as a few teams in the WPS. She have no idea why she didn’t tell Ashlyn about all this when it started to happen, instead she shut her out, basically lying to her face as soon as she wanted to talk about it. She felt horrible about it but couldn’t get herself to break the blonde’s heart. She knew she would choose Frankfurt, she knew the moment they called but telling Ashlyn that, when she was so excited for them to play at the same side of the ocean, was something she couldn’t do. Therefore, she took the easy way out and probably broke Ashlyn’s heart even more along the way.

“Okay, jeez Al, I’m sorry. I just care about you and I don’t want you to do something you regret,” he says in an attempt to calm her down.

With those words Ali almost panic, they are way too much alike the last words Ashlyn said to her before she left the apartment. She takes a deep breath, collecting herself, before she speaks again. “I know and I’m the one that should be sorry. I didn’t mean to snap at you,” she answers quietly. She’s more than thankful for having Kyle in her life again. He’s been through so much yet he’s the one she can lean on whenever she need to. He’s her rock and one of her best friends, and he’s also the only one she has told about her and Ashlyn.

_“Kyle, are you awake”, she whispers before he has a chance to say anything._

_“Yeah I am,” he mumbles and if Ali had been sober, she would have both notice his sleepy voice and his tired eyes._

_“Great because I have to tell you something,” she says, not knowing if she should be excited or terrified. She’s sitting in the bathroom of her hotel room at 4am and they did just get back from a night out. A night when everything she could think of was the kiss she and Ashlyn shared in the doorway before they went down to meet the rest of the girls._

_“I’msortofseeingsomeone”, she blurs out before she can stop herself and she realizes that he probably didn’t understood a word of what she just said._

_“Wait, what?” he says and confirms her suspicions, looking really confused on the other side of the screen._

_She takes a deep breath and tries again, this time slower. “I said that I’m sort of seeing someone.”_

_Kyle is all of a sudden wide awake and can’t hide his excitement. “Whooh there, for how long have this been going on, and why do I not know about it until now? And the most important question, who’s the lucky guy?”he looks like a kid on the morning of Christmas Day._

_“Eeh-ee…i-it’s…it’s not a guy Kyle” Ali answers without looking at him, her hands resting in her lap are all of a sudden very interesting._

_Kyle is only quiet for a heartbeat before he speaks, “Ooh, well then, who’s the lucky girl?” he says, still with a goofy smile on his face._

_Ali stays quiet, this turned out to be much harder than she thought and not even with the alcohol in her blood, she can manage herself to tell him. Instead she says what’s been on her mind the whole evening and night. “She kissed me. She just kissed me and I kissed her back and then we were just standing there and I think I have feelings for her and I don’t kn…” she rambles before Kyle interrupts her._

_“Slow down Al, I can only hear half of what you’re saying and it doesn’t make any sense. Let’s try again. Who’s the girl that apparently kissed you, if I understood your mumble right?” he says seriously but with a smirk in the corner of his mouth._

_She takes a deep breath once again, “Ashlyn…it’s Ashlyn,” she whispers with her eyes closed._

_This time, Kyle stays quiet for quite a long time and when Ali opens her eyes; his facial expression tells her that he really is surprised. “Ashlyn...as in…your Ashlyn,” he finally says aiming on them being best friends._

_Ali can’t keep herself from giggle when she answers him. “Yeah, I guess you can call her that.”_

_“Oh, I see. And how long has this been going on Alexandra,” he says with a sassy voice to show that he’s not happy that his sister didn’t tell him sooner._

_“Kyle,” Ali whines. “She kissed me tonight, you are literally the first and only person who knows about it,” she continues as her cheeks turns red. “But I guess you could say it’s been going on since the first time we saw each other,” she confesses, now with deeply red cheeks._

_“ALEXANDRA BLAIR KRIEGER, what do you mean with that? You met her 6 month ago,” Kyle is now practically yelling and Ali sights._

_“I don’t know how to explain it. It’s just…some sort of connection, I have felt it from the very beginning, and there may or may not have been some flirting during the past months,” she says, now unable to hide her smile._

_“You really like her, don’t you?” he asks, now deadly serious._

_“Yes I think I do. She’s amazing Kyle, she’s kind and loving, funny and dedicated, a shoulder to cry on and an amazing best friend to laugh with. She’s everything,” Ali’s shocked by her own words, she’s been thinking all of those things about the blonde since they met but she never said them out loud and by doing just that, she all of a sudden realizes how deep down she is for the blonde keeper._

_“I’m so happy for you Al, so very happy. No one deserves this more than you do,” Kyle says and they are just looking at each other for a while, tears streaming down their cheeks. “Even though I’m kind of mad that you didn’t tell me sooner,” he finishes with a wink._

Ali snaps back to reality only to hear Kyle’s impatient voice. “Al, are you there?” She sight again and decides that she can’t do this right now. “I’m really sorry Kyle but I have to go. My flight leaves early tomorrow and I’m nowhere near done with the packing,” since it’s true, she only feels half terrible as she’s hanging up on him.

 

NOVEMBER 2011

“I don’t know if I can do it Whit, she’ll be there and I don’t think I’m ready,” Ashlyn says as she’s reading the email over and over again. She has been called up to a two week training camp, and so has Ali. They haven’t seen each other since Ashlyn walked out of the apartment, two and a half months ago.

“Ash, you are a professional soccer player, you can’t let your feelings for Ali come in the way of your dream. You know as well as I do that we can’t take the call ups for granted. You are going to go there and kick ass because you deserve to be there. I promise you, I will kill you if you let her get under your skin,” Whitney says.

Ashlyn closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before she answers and when she does, she has made a decision. She wasn’t the one walking out and giving up on the relationship, that’s all on Ali. “Fuck it, I know. I can’t care about her, she’s the one breaking my heart and I have nothing to apologize for. If she wants to talk, she can come to me, otherwise I’ll try to stay as far away from her as possible.”

This was not exactly what Whitney had in mind but it’s at least better than a sad and angry Ashlyn. “You don’t have to ignore her, you are both professionals and you are playing on the same team. What if she’s on your backline?” she tries.

Ashlyn is quiet for a while, “I guess I have to be civil when we’re on the field or around the team but Whitney I swear, the less I see her the better it will be.”

“Good, sounds like you have a plan. I have to go now, see you at the airport in a few days. I love you Ash”, Whitney says.

“Yeah, see you. And I love you too, thank you for putting up with me,” Ashlyn says with a smile before hanging up.

She spends the next couple of days being anxious over meeting Ali again and even though she hopefully convinced Whitney it was okay, she failed convincing herself.

 

A few days later Ashlyn is walking through the hotel doors along with Whitney, Pinoe, HAO and Kelley. They’ve just arrived from the airport and the keeper is praying a certain brunette won’t be in the lobby. She let out a sight when she scans the room, without seeing Ali but as she’s turning away from the desk after getting her room key, she hears it and freezes. In a room with 200 people, she would still recognize the beautiful laugh belonging to Alexandra Krieger.

“Hiiiii Kells,” Ali says behind her and Ashlyn can see Whitney shooting her a glance from the side. “ _Act normal,”_ she’s mouthing and the blonde closes her eyes and takes a deep breath before turning around, finding herself face to face with the woman who broke her heart into a million pieces only a few short months ago. It’s obvious to her that the defender wasn’t aware of her presence by her facial expression and she tries her best to act as northing happened, the only one noticing her failure is Ashlyn.

“Hi Ash,” Ali says with a somewhat shaky voice.

“Hi,” the blonde answers as she’s grabbing her bags and walking past a stunned Ali. Whitney is walking after her and when she passes the brunette, she squeezes her shoulder and gives her a sad smile. Without either Ashlyn or Ali noticing, HAO has been watching their interaction and she’s confused. During the roughly six months leading up to the world cup, the both women had been inseparable and now, after Ali being in Germany for a couple of month, they barely said hi to each other. She’s pleased when she sees that she has Ali as her roommate.

Later that night, when Ashlyn successfully has avoided Ali the whole day, the brunette and Heather are alone in their room and the UNC alumni decides to bring it up. “What’s up with you and Ash?” she asks casually and Ali’s reaction confirms her suspicions, something is clearly off. The brunette, who is on her phone texting, drops it and stars at the woman in the other bed. “What?” she says, trying to hide the panic she’s feeling.

“Oh nothing, I was just wondering because you both seemed quite bothered by each other in the lobby and if I’m not wrong, you were almost joined at the hip before the world cup. What’s going on Al?” the brunette is just staring at her for a moment, mentally kicking herself for not being observant enough to see Ashlyn in the lobby and instead being taken by surprise when she turned around.

“Nothing,” she mumbles and goes back to whatever’s on her phone.

“Don’t lie to me Ali, I’ve known you long enough to know when you do,” Heather says as she’s moving over to the brunette’s bed. “Talk to me instead,” she continues, stroking Ali gently over her back as they are sitting next to each other with their legs over the beds edge. By these words, Ali cracks down and leans her head to HAO’s shoulder, sobbing heavily.

“I-I…I screwed up,” Ali manages to say between sobs. I…W-We…I b-br-broke her h-heart,” she continues without knowing how to explain everything that happened.

HAO is even more confused now than before but understands that she won’t get anything out of the crying defender until she has calmed down so instead of pushing, she holds her tightly for a few minutes until she can her Ali’s breaths slow down. She pulls back and takes her face in her hand, forcing their eyes to meet. “How do you feel about explaining that?” she asks with a smile and Ali groans.

“Do I have to?” she says in an attempt to drag it out.

“Yeah I actually think you owe me that,” HAO says, bumping her shoulder into Ali’s. “You know you can talk to me about anything, right? What you are telling me won’t leave this room, I promise,” she continues and Ali stays quiet for another moment before she decides to be honest.

“I broke her heart because I love her, I’m madly in love with her and have been since we first met but I had to put myself and my career first. So I broke her heart,” she says before she can change her mind and when she has let it out, she starts to cry again.

“Oh Ali,” Heather says, hugging her tighter. “Why haven’t you talked to me?”

Instead of answering, the brunette continues to cry and once again, she’s given time to calm down.

“Can you tell me from the beginning?” Ali looks at her and shrugs before she starts.

“I guess you can say we had some sort of connection from the very first time we met. Something about her was so intriguing and I couldn’t get enough of her company. We could spend hour after hour talking and when the first camp was over, we had contact on a daily basis and got to know each other. She became my best friend so quickly but it didn’t feel weird, it felt like the most natural thing in the world, like we were meant to meet,” she says without looking at HAO. “I ignored the voice in my head, the voice telling me that I liked her more than as a friend but as the flirting increased, it became harder and then she kissed me…”

“Wait, she kissed you?” HAO interrupts her, eyes wide open in shock.

“Yeah she did,” Ali can’t resist chuckling. “And it’s not like I didn’t kiss her back,” she says, slightly embarrassed by the confession.

“Whooh, hold on a second, I don’t think I understood how serious this was. When did this happen?”

“During the camp in West Palm Beach, half way through it, and then we spend the second half sneaking away to spend time alone,” her cheeks are now deeply red and she still can’t look up from her hands. “After that we sort of started dating and spend as much time together as possible before I left for the world cup and I had more or less promised her that I was going to play state side after the summer but then everything went wrong over there and I felt like I had to go back and finish my journey in Germany in a better way than with a loss in the world cup final,” she continues finally able to look at the woman next to her. “I couldn’t tell her that though, knowing I would break her heart, so I took the easy way out. We had a fight, she left the apartment and I took the opportunity to leave as well. Two days later I signed with Frankfurt and left and I haven’t spoken to her once since she walked out,” she finishes with tears slowly falling down her cheeks.

Heather has no idea what to say. She knew the both women were close but not that they’d been dating and seeing Ali like this, and hearing her story, made her own heart break for both of them.

“But I still love her,” Ali mumbles after a few moments of silence. “And I would do anything to change what I did.”

“You need to talk to her Al, you owe that to the both of you,” HAO finally says. “And it’s you who has to take the step.”

 

Five days, that’s for how long Ashlyn successfully avoids Ali outside of the field. When they’re on, both of them are professional and manage to work together without really talking to each other. Ali tries a few times but the blonde barely answers before leaving as quickly as possible.

On the sixth day of camp, it comes to a point where it’s impossible. Ashlyn are on her way up to the room as she sees the elevator doors slowly close. “Hold it please,” she yells as she sprints the last yards, only to realize it is Ali who’s standing inside. She closes her eyes and turns her back to the brunette but Ali is tired of this.

“Ash,” she tries without getting any answer. “Ash, I think we need to talk, you can’t ignore me forever,” she says and with this, the blonde turns back towards her slowly.

“Talk? You mean that this is a good time to talk? How about two and a half month ago when you decided to move back to Germany, leaving me without as much as a good bye. You didn’t find it necessary to talk then, did you?” Ashlyn’s voice is calm but her eyes betray her and show Ali just how hurt she is. “I think it’s too late, you’ve had several months to get in touch with me, now isn’t a good time. I’m here to play soccer” she finishes before turning around once again to walk out of the elevator.

“No, I won’t let you walk away again,” Ali says as she reaches for the blonde’s hand, stopping her from leaving. “We have to talk.”

Ashlyn is starring at her for a moment before she mutters, “Fine. My room. Now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Jeeeez guys, are anyone still reading this after my long break from here before the last chapter? If you do, please let me know. It's always more fun to write when you get feedback.


	7. I Believe In You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time to clear the air but will they ever really solve things and are they on the same page? Camp ends, the new year comes and so does the Olympic Qualification game against the Dominican Republic...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> THANK YOU so much for all the kind words. You are amazing. Thanks to them, here's a new chapter for you all. Keep sending the love and I might have a new update for you in a couple of days ;)

Ali walks slowly after Ashlyn towards the blonde’s room, already regretting taking the discussion. She’s nowhere ready to hear what Ashlyn has to say and she is absolutely not ready to hear that she hates her. Because that must be what she does, right? If the roles had been reversed, Ali would have been more than pissed and she would probably have hated Ashlyn, at least a bit. When the door closes behind them, Ali hesitates. She’s not sure she knows what to do, now when she has gotten the blonde where she wants her; alone and hopefully willing to talk.

“I’m sorry,” she blurs out and Ashlyn is just looking at her, waiting for her to continue. When she doesn’t, the blonde chuckles ironically.

“That’s a good start I guess, but I’m curious. What exactly are you sorry about? Is it for lying to my face when you said you would stay here and play? Or is it for leaving the apartment without a word? Or maybe it’s because you signed with Frankfurt and left for Germany, not even saying goodbye? Or for not picking up my calls, nor calling back, for two and a half fucking months? Or wait, this is my absolute favorite, is it for completely breaking my heart into a MILLION. FUCKING. PIECES?” she says, yelling towards the end.

Ali is standing in front of her with tears in her eyes and she still has no idea what to do or say but she realizes that this might be her only chance. “Everything Ash, I’m so very sorry for all of those things. You have no idea how much I wish I could go back and change what happened and what I did,” she can’t keep the tears back and as they streaming down her face, she can see the blonde getting even angrier.

“No Ali, no. You do not have the right to cry. You are the one who made the call. You are the one who walked out on me, who gave up on our relationship. Because of what? You being sad over the loss? Is that really a reason for breaking my heart?” Ashlyn is throwing her arms out in frustration as she start pacing back and forth in the small room. She’s mentally kicking herself for getting this worked up. She had almost convinced herself that she would be able to have a conversation with Ali without losing it. When Ali doesn’t answer, the blonde stops in front of her to wait for some sort of reaction on her words and they end up staring at each other for a good minute.

Ali knows she can’t win, nothing she says will ever be good enough so without a word, she takes a step closer to Ashlyn, throwing her arms around her neck and hugging her tightly. The blonde doesn’t hug back, she just stands there and when Ali finally speaks, Ashlyn can feel her own tears rolling down her cheeks.

“You are the most important person in my life Ash and I understand if you hate me, I hate myself, but I promise you that I will do everything it takes for you to forgive me. Our story does not end like this. I won’t let it end like this so believe me when I say that I will prove how much I care about you,” she says into the crock of the blonde’s neck before she let go, turns around and walks towards the door. Just before she walks out Ashlyn is calling after her.

“Al?” she says with hesitation in her voice.

“Yeah?”

“I don’t hate you, I never have and I never will. I can’t hate you,” she mumbles before turning around and enters the bathroom, leaving Ali with a sad smile on her face alone by the door.

 

During the remaining part of camp, things between them are slightly better and they can sit by the same table and actually participate in a conversation together, along with the other girls without things being too weird. At the last night, after their game against Sweden, Ali sees the blonde leave dinner and walk towards the backyard of the hotel. She decides to make one last attempt to make things right and jogs after her.

“Hey Ash,” she calls out when she’s a few yards behind her, scaring her slightly.

“Hi,” the blonde answers, but continues to walk without turning around.

“Can I join you?” Ali asks cautiously, hesitating to follow before a positive answer.

“Sure,” Ashlyn says with a shrug as she slows down her speed to let Ali catch up with her.

They are walking like that, next to each other for a few minutes around in the backyard before Ali takes the blonde’s hand to stop her. Ashlyn are slowly turning herself to stand in front of Ali and her heartbeat picks up immediately, the defender will probably always have that effect on her. Ali can feel a confident she hasn’t felt around Ashlyn since before the world cup and without any hesitation she looks her straight in the eyes when she starts speaking.

“I said it before, and I will probably say it again, but I’m serious about proving for you that you should forgive me. You might never trust me fully and I understand that, I also understand that we are done with each other on a romantic level but I don’t think I can live without having you in my life Ash. So what do you say about going back to being friends?” she asks, still looking Ashlyn in the eyes.

Instead of feeling relieved, as Ali thought the blonde would, Ashlyn is feeling the panic grow inside of her. She doesn’t want to be friends with Ali, they had never been just normal friends and she knows they never will. She wants her back badly and even though she wouldn’t tell her that right now, she still wants her to work for earning that place in her heart again. Ali makes it, however, clear that they are not on the same page about that and Ashlyn does the one thing she can think of at the moment.

“Yes, I’d like that,” she says without any emotions in her voice and she’s almost certain Ali won’t buy it completely but as it is right now, she don’t have more to give. She’s not in the mood for trying to pretend like she wants to be the gorgeous, funny and absolutely beautiful Alexandra Krieger’s friend.

“Okay, great,” Ali says a little too excited, obviously oblivion to Ashlyn’s lack of excitement, and before the blonde can turn away, she embraces her in a quick hug and when she let go, she’s the one turning around to start walking back. She gives Ashlyn a look over her shoulder with a teasing smile. “Are you coming, friend?”

The blonde gives her a forced smile and groans internally for not telling Ali that she can take this whole friend thing with her back to Germany and not bother her with it. But she’s tired of fighting with her, and she is tired of being sad and angry. The only thing she wants to do, now that she knows she won’t get Ali back, is to move on and forget about all of this as quickly as possible.

 

Christmas comes and goes and they are sending a few texts back and forth, not many and not about anything important. When it’s time for New Years Ashlyn spends the evening with friends in New York, getting way too drunk and ends up hooking up with a brunette that reminds her of Ali. When she wakes up the next morning, feeling like shit and with a stranger in her bed, she sees a text on her phone. It’s from Ali and the time stamp tells her it came a quartet past 12, when Ashlyn was too busy making out with the girl now asleep next to her, to notice it.

**Ali:** Happy New Year Ash, I’m hoping you’re having a good one. I miss you.

The blonde groans, even though they’ve been in contact during the last month, this is not the way she wanted to start the New Year. A years she has decided should be all about herself, no Ali to distract her or breaking her heart again. At the same time, she’s feeling guilty over sleeping with someone else, which is totally ridiculous but she can’t stop thinking about what could have happened if she had seen the text when it came. Would she have answered? Probably she thinks, she would have been too drunk to resist so in the end, this might have been what’s best for her. She’s for sure not going to answer now anyway.

In Germany, Ali has celebrated the new year with her teammates and a bunch of other friends and it’s when she’s going to bed she no longer can’t resist. She’s been wanting to text Ashlyn the whole night but has been sober enough to talk herself out of it, until now. She’s exhausted and not so sober anymore, and she misses the blonde’s strong arms and warm skin more than ever when she’s going to bed on her own. She types it out quickly and presses send before she has a chance to change her mind but gets disappointed when she sees that the blonde doesn’t open it. It’s only 12:15 in New York so if she’s not already passed out, she should be awake to see it. She waits for another 20 minutes but can eventually not keep her eyes open and falls asleep.

When she wakes up it’s already 2 pm and she feels terrible, thanking herself her head was clear enough before she got to bed to put both a big glass of water along with pain killers on the nightstand. She suddenly remembers the text she sent Ashlyn and groans, why did she do that? Almost afraid to check her phone, she picks it up slowly but her anxiety is replaced with disappointment when she sees that the screen is empty from the blonde’s name. Instead she has a handful of notifications from her brother and a few from the girls back home. She opens the text she sent and sees that Ashlyn read it over an hour ago, without replying and she’s mentally kicking herself for even sending it. This was not the way she wanted to start the New Year. All those feelings, along with her being hung over makes her cry and even though it’s already afternoon, she turns around and snuggles back under the blanket to fall asleep again, she’s not ready to deal with this year just yet.

 

20 JANUARY 2012

“Are you okay with this,” Whitney asks as they sit down in front of the TV to watch the opening match in the 2012 CONCACAF Women's Olympic Qualifying against the Dominican Republic.

“Why wouldn’t I?” Ashlyn asks with a raised eyebrow and Whitney sights.

“Ash, for how long have we been friends?” the question is rhetorical and she don’t want an answer. “Don’t you think that I can see how hard this is for you? First of all for not being on the roster after fighting so hard and secondly for seeing her play, I know you miss her more and more for every day,” she continues and she can see how surprised Ashlyn is over her noticing it.

“You’re not on the roster either and you seem to do fine,” Ashlyn says, avoiding what Whitney really wants to talk about and before she gets an answer, Whitney chuckles.

“I’m not heartbroken Ash, that’s the difference,” she says with a small smile.

“I’m not heartbroken either,” the blonde mutters.

“Whatever you say…” Whitney finally states before they fall into a comfortable silence as the game begins.

The silence is however quickly replaced with cheering, yelling at the referee and screaming on their friends on the field. They are crushing their opponents but late in the first half, the joyful atmosphere changes in an instant when they see Ali take a shot and then go down after a reckless tackle. And Ashlyn is on her feet within a heartbeat.

“NOOOO, WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT…” she’s yelling, putting her hands around her head in shock as she sees Ali lying on the turf, screaming out her pain.

“I think I’m going to turn the TV off,” Whitney says from the couch and Ashlyn can’t do more than nod. She can’t watch Ali down that way so it’s probably for the best.

She sits down again hiding her face in her hands as her tears starts to fall and when she closes her eyes the only thing she can hear inside of her head is the scream of pain from Ali in the exact moment she went down, a scream that makes the blonde shiver.

“Fuck, that’s not good,” she says, more to herself than to Whitney after a few moments of silence. She reaches over to the table to get her phone, quickly finding HAO’s number and typing out a text to her.

**Ash:** Just saw Ali go down, I know you’re in the middle of the game and won’t see this in a couple of hours but please let me know how she’s doing when you can. Thank you.

After a while, they turn the TV back on again to continue to watch the game but it’s obvious to them that the girls on the field are affected of what happened and that all they want is for the game to be over. Neither of the women on the couch is celebrating more and even though the score is 14-0 when the referee blows the whistle, no one seems to be especially happy.

Later that night she finally receives the text she has been waiting for the whole evening.

**HAO:** She’s hanging in there, MRI tomorrow morning but it doesn’t look good.

**Ash:** I could see that on the replay, we turned the TV off. Give her a hug, but don’t tell her you talked to me pleas.

**HAO:** She told me everything that happened between you guys, I think you should give her a call, or at least text her.

**Ash:** Oh…she did? Well, yeah I guess I should.

**HOA:** Do so, but I’ll let you know how she is tomorrow. Need to go to bed now, so should you. Night Ash.

**Ash:** Thanks, night.

Ashlyn sights when she’s putting her phone back on the nightstand to go to sleep, debating over whether or not she should text Ali. She decides to wait until the next day when she hopefully knows how bad it is.

 

During the next day, she’s unable to do much more than pacing around in her apartment, waiting for an update on Ali. Thinking back, it kills her that she didn’t reply to the brunette’s text from New Years Eve, if she had done so, things might have been different. She had slowly realized that having Ali in her life, as a friend, might be better than not having her at all. But at this point, knowing she was injured and probably scared, there was nothing she wanted to do as much as holding her tightly, kissing the top of her head and telling her that everything would be just fine.

Eventually, after a few long hours, the text finally arrives.

**HAO:** Ali just came back with bad news. Both ACL and MCL… She’s flying home to stay with her dad on Monday. TEXT HER!!!

Ashlyn don’t even care to answer HAO, instead she’s scrolling through her messages to find her and Ali’s previous conversation. She opens it and sees the text from a few weeks ago, feeling guilty over it all over again. She hesitates for a moment, not knowing what to write but eventually decides to show Ali that she actually cares.

**Ash:** Just heard the bad news, fuck it sucks. But on the other hand, if someone will manage to get through this, it’s you, I know it. Keep your head up princess and let me know if you need anything, I know what you are going through.

Not 10 minutes later, her phone buzzes in her pocket and she sees it’s from Ali.

**Ali:** Thanks Ash, yeah it definitely sucks. Flying home on Monday and will hopefully have surgery pretty soon.

**Ash:** Good, take care and keep me posted.

On this, Ali doesn’t reply and Ashlyn gets frustrated, she can’t just walk around at home, not knowing how Ali’s doing and she realizes that she won’t get anything out of the brunette. She therefore makes a quick decision and picks up her phone once again, dialing a number for the first time, feeling the nervousness taking over.

“Hi, it’s…ehm…it’s Ashlyn, Ashlyn Harris.”

 

Four days later, Ali wakes up in her childhood home for the second day in a row since she flew in from Vancouver, and just as the past mornings, she starts to cry when everything hits her. She’s been crying for most of the days since her injury, the only time she didn’t was around the team, she had to be strong for them, showing them that this wasn’t breaking her down. But now, behind safe doors, she lets everything out. Her dad must have heard her cry because he comes up to check in on her, knocking carefully on her door before entering her room.

“How’s mu favorite daughter doing?” Ken asks with a small smile.

“Fine,” she answers but cracks down immediately. “I don’t know if I can do this,” she says between sobs. “What if I never can play again?”

“Alex, you are the strongest person I know, you will get back and you will get back stronger than ever. That’s what you do, I believe in you” he says as he sits down on her bed, taking her small hand in his own. “We’ll get through this together, me, your mom and Kyle with be with you every step on the way.”

“I know, I know,” she says, her eyes showing her tired she is.

“How did you sleep?” Ken asks, knowing she probably didn’t get many hours of peaceful rest based on her look.

“Not so good, my knee hurts and it’s hard to find a comfortable position,” she says honestly with a shrug. She knows that lying for her dad isn’t an option, he knows her too well.

“Go back to sleep then, I’ll come up with something to eat in a few hours.”

 

Two hours later, when it’s almost noon, Ali wakes up again and she can immediately feel that something is different. She turns around from the wall to face her room but freezes when she sees who’s sitting in the armchair next to her bed, wrapped up in her phone.

“Ash,” she whispers quietly, not really believing her eyes, and the blonde takes her focus away from the phone in her hand.

“Morning princess, how do you feel?” she says with a smile as she leans over to tuck away a strain of dark brown hair from Ali’s face.

“W-what…what are you doing here?” Ali says, ignoring Ashlyn’s question and the blonde becomes somewhat shy.

“I couldn’t stand not knowing how you are doing Al. When you went down, I panicked. Time stood still and all I wanted to do was being there by the field, telling you it’s going to be okay,” Ashlyn start to play with Ali’s fingers before she takes her hand in her own. “You scared to shit out of me and I realized that there is no where I want to be than with you right now. I called your dad after we’d texted and asked if it was okay if I came and visited and he said yes, even more positive when I talked to him yesterday and he told me you wasn’t doing very well. I drove down this morning.”

Tears are streaming down the brunette’s cheeks and she tightens the grip of Ashlyn’s hand, still not believing she’s actually there. “I’ve missed you so much,” she whispers and when the blonde leans over to kiss her gently on her forehead, her silent tears turns into a heavy sob.

“I’ve missed you too princess, so much.” she says with a smile and with those words, Ali moves over to one side of the bed and looks at the blonde slightly insecure.

“Can you lay down here with me for a while, I need you to hold me,” she says and Ashlyn don’t answer when she, still with a smile on her face, carefully lays down next to Ali, a little afraid to hurt her leg. After a few moments, they are settled; Ali on her side with Ashlyn spooning her and holding her tightly.

“I don’t think I will get through this Ash,” Ali whispers quietly after a few moments. “I’m not sure I ever will play soccer again.”

“Of course you will, I believe in you. Go back to sleep now Alex,” the blonde whispers. “I won’t go anywhere.” Ali smiles at the echo of her dads words and for the first time since before the world cup, she feels safe and home, tightly wrapped up in Ashlyn’s arms.

Both of them falling asleep quickly, Ali of exhaustion and Ashlyn of finally being able to relax after a few stressful days, now when she has Ali in her arms again. When she wakes up they have shifted position and she’s on her back with Ali’s head resting on her chest and she almost panic over the brunette’s leg.

“Ali…” she tries, shaking her shoulder carefully without any reaction. “ Ali, babe, you have to wake up.”

“Mmmh-mm,” Ali mumbles before she stiffens, realizing Ashlyn is holding her gently.

“Relax Alex, it’s only me,” she says. “You need to move over to your back though, I don’t think this is a good position for your knee,” she continues with a smile.

“Oh sorry,” the brunette says and Ashlyn can see that she’s embarrassed. “I didn’t mean to…” she manage to say before the blonde cuts her of.

“Don’t apologize, I want to hold you but I’m just thinking about your knee,” she offers, stroking Ali’s cheek gently before placing a kiss on her head.

They turn around so Ali’s on her back and when Ashlyn tries to settle down comfortably, she sees a tray next to the bed.

“Ooh, I think your dad has been up here with food while we were asleep,” she says as her cheeks turns red when she realizes he must have seen them sleeping close together.

“Yeah I guess so,” Ali replies with a shrug when she sees the tray.

“And you’re okay with him seeing us…like this?” the blonde asks cautiously.

“I don’t really care, I’m just glad that you are here and I think he understood that something was going on when you called him and asked to come here. He’s smart and has probably already figured out that you are important to me. I might have mentioned you during the past year,” she says with a sheepish grin on her face. “It’s been hard to not talk about you all the time.”

“Oh,” Ashlyn says with a surprised face. “Even after…you know, the world cup?”

“Even after the world cup,” Ali confirms with a sad smile. “I’ve missed you every single day and you didn’t become less important to me just because I behaved like an asshole.”

Ashlyn pulls her closer and hugs her tightly, without saying a world. A lump in her throat makes it impossible to speak and Ali can sense her struggle and changes subject.

“I’m hungry, are you?” she says with a nod against the tray. “It’s probably cold but I don’t really care,” she continues as she sits up in the bed.

“Yeah, let’s eat something,” the blonde answers as she’s lifting over the food to the bed.

 

They spend the rest of the day in bed, talking about anything and everything, and Ken is checking in on them a few times, not questioning them cuddled up close together. When the evening comes and the darkness starts to fill the room, Ali takes a deep breath and asks what’s been on her mind the whole day.

“For how long are you staying?” she whispers.

“Almost a week, if that’s okay with you? If not I can change my flight ticket but as of now, I’m flying directly from here down to Florida in 6 days, the 31st,” she answers shyly.

“It’s more than okay with me,” Ali says with a smile as she gives her hand a squeeze.

For a moment, they are staring at each other before Ali’s eyes wander down to the blonde’s lips and then back up to her eyes. Ashlyn hesitates for only a moment before she leans in and places a light kiss on Ali’s lips. She pulls pack slightly but the brunette quickly grabs her neck, pulling her back in and crashes their lips together again and this time, it’s not just a quick peck. They make out for a while and when Ashlyn bites down on the brunette’s lower lip, Ali moans quietly and her tongue is begin for entrance.

“I-I ne-need you…please Ash,” she mumbles into the blonde’s ear as she’s placing kisses on her neck, teasingly sucking on her pulse point. “Take me, please,” she’s begging.

Ashlyn knows, in the back of her head, that this is a bad idea, they should definitely talk about what they want and where they are going from here but she can’t stop now. Her whole body is craving to feel the brunette underneath her and without thinking; she hovers over her, careful not to hurt her leg. She manage to get the t-shirt off of Ali and when she sees her naked breasts, she groans out of lust and dives down, gently taking one of her nipples in her mouth, earning another moan from Ali. She’s sucking and flicking with her tongue over the nipple as she gently squeezes the other breast with her hand. She gives the other breast the same treatment before she moves down over Ali’s body, tracing her rib tattoo with her tongue.

“Ash,” the brunette mumbles. “For God sake, fuck me already:”

The blonde had been thinking of taking her time, showing Ali how much she had missed her, but with those words, she realizes she can’t do that, she needs and wants her just as much as Ali does. She hovers back over her and moves her hand down to the waistband of Ali’s sweatpants but stops abruptly when the brunette once again lets out a loud moan.

“You need to be quieter if we’re going to do this, your dad is in the house,” she says as she chuckles lightly.

“I. Don’t. Care,” Ali mumbles as she’s trying to move her hips to get Ashlyn’s now still hand to where she needs it the most while she at the same time pulls the blondes shirt over her head, along with her sports bra.

“Oh you will definitely care tomorrow if he hears us,” the blonde teases.

“Fine, now go back to fucking me,” she whispers in the blonde’s ear before tugging on the earlobe gently and Ashlyn isn’t late to obey her.

She picks up where she left off, moving her hand down under Ali’s pants until she reaches her wetness. “You are so wet,” she mumbles softly as her fingers slides back and forth through the brunette’s folds. Instead of answering, Ali arches her back when she feels Ashlyn’s thumb against her clit and when she without any warning slides not one, but two fingers into her core; a light scream slips her lips.

Ashlyn are done with the teasing and as she thrust her fingers into Ali, her other hand gets her pants down to give herself more space between the brunette’s legs to move her hand.

“It feels…uurhg…soo good baby, faster. I’m…aah-aa…I’m so close,” Ali moans out as she throws her arms around Ashlyn to press their naked chests together.

Ashlyn knows the brunette won’t be able to be quite enough when she finally comes so when she thrust into her hard a few times, curling her fingers to hit her most sensitive spot, she covers her mouth with her own, kissing her hungrily. She feels the walls tightens around her fingers and when Ali comes, she comes hard, throwing her head back and moaning, luckily more quiet than Ashlyn thought but she quickly finds her lips again, just in case.

They are riding out wave after wave together and when Ali finally relaxes, Ashlyn pulls her fingers out, sucking them clean and leans back in to kiss the woman underneath her, letting her taste herself.

“Mmmh-mm that was good,” Ali says, smiling into the kiss.

“You say so, I didn’t notice,” Ashlyn smiles back before pulling away. “Let’s go to sleep, you need to rest,” she continues and when she feels Ali stiffens beside her, she kisses her again before she look her deep in the eyes. “I will be her when you wake up, I promise. I’m not going anywhere,” and by those words, Ali relaxes and snuggles into Ashlyn’s side, falling asleep within seconds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Once again, thank you, I hope you liked this one. Didn't leave you hanging as much this time ;)
> 
> Now when we are a few chapters into this story, I want your opinion on something. Truth is, I moved to the U.S 5 month ago from a none-English speaking European country and after reading fics on her for a while, I realized writing might be a good way to develop my English. I've, of course, learned English in school while growing up but never, until I moved here, really used it. So my question to you is, what do you think about my language? Is there something specific I'm doing wrong repeatedly or any words/phrases I'm using that are annoying? Please be honest and hit me with what you got! :)


	8. You'll Know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ashlyn and Ali wakes up in each others arms, will things go back to normal or what does this reunion mean?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I absolutely love your comments, thank you a thousand times for all the kind words. I work really hard on developing my language and it feels good to hear that it pays off. Thank you again, and here's next chapter, it's a little bit shorter than the last ones but I hope you like it.

_You’ll know you’re in love when you can’t imagine your life without her. You’ll know when hearing her voice can change your whole day, when a seven hour conversation feels like 30 minutes and the night go by without either of you notice it. You’ll know when her body fits against yours like a puzzle piece, when you finish each other’s sentences and her laugh is like music to your ears. You’ll know when everything about her feels like home, when her presence makes you feel safe, and when you can look into her eyes for an eternity. You’ll know when the more you get to know her; the more it feels like your soul has loved hers forever._

_Because she’s magic, and all you can do is thank the universe a million times for sending you a soul like hers._

When the morning comes, Ashlyn wakes up with Ali still snuggled into her side and she can’t resist smiling. There is no other person, dead or alive, she rather would wake up next to than Alexandra Krieger. She picks up her phone from the night stand and sees it almost nine and it suddenly make sense why her belly is making weird noises, she hasn’t been eating anything since the afternoon yesterday and she decides to awake the sleeping beauty.

“Al, it’s time to wake up,” she says as she gently kisses her forehead. “It’s nine o’clock and I’m starving.”

“Mmh-m, just a few more minutes,” the brunette mumbles sleepy and Ashlyn chuckles.

“Do you want me to die?”

“Okay, okay…I’m awake. But can’t we just stay here for a while? I’ve missed waking up next to you,” Ali says with a small smile as she snuggles even closer to Ashlyn, who’s not one to complain.

“Sure, but you’ll be the one to explain for everyone that I died because you didn’t let me out of bed,” Ashlyn says teasingly but tightens her grip around the smaller woman.

They are staying like that for a while, enjoying each others company and the silence. Ali is, however, the one breaking it eventually.

“Can I tell you something?” she asks.

“Of course you can, you don’t have to ask me for permission if you want to talk about something.”

“I haven’t been with anyone since…since…you,” Ali whispers shyly as she hides her face in the blonde’s chest.

“What? I can’t hear you when you mumble Alex,” Ashlyn answers softly, giving her a kiss on the top of her head.

Ali looks up, cheeks red, but this time she don’t look away when she speaks. “I said that I haven’t been with anyone since we…you know, before the world cup.”

“Oh…okay,” Ashlyn answers, obviously surprised, both by the fact itself and the brunette’s honesty about it. She tries to hide it though, not wanting to upset Ali by assuming anything.

“H-have you?” Ali asks but at the same moment as the words leave her lips, her eyes goes wide. “I’m sorry, you definitely don’t have to answer that,” she continues, cheeks now even more red.

“It’s okay Al, I think we need to be more honest with each other anyway,” Ashlyn chuckles, not really sure why the brunette wants to know this. “And for your question, yes…once,” she continues, now the one feeling embarrassed. She’s having a hard time looking at Ali, even though she knows she hasn’t done anything wrong.

“Well, okay…” the brunette says and Ashlyn can see she wants to ask something more.

“Anything else you want to know?” she therefore offers.

“Eeh-em, can I ask you when?” Ali finally says. She has, a few days after New Year’s Eve, seen a photo Ashlyn was tagged in together with a beautiful brunette and she is quietly praying it wasn’t her, but something tells her she will get disappointed.

“New year’s eve…” the blonde answers after a moment of silence and she immediately feels the need to explain herself, for reason she don’t understand. “And, I know it technically wasn’t wrong because you and me, we were nothing at the time, we barely spoke to each other, but I want you to know that I still felt bad about it for some reason,” she continues. “I was too drunk and I missed you and she reminded me of…you,” she finishes before actually lifting her head to look at Ali.

“Oh, so that’s why you didn’t respond to my text?” it’s more a fact then an actual question and Ashlyn just nods.

“I really missed you that night too. I was thinking about texting you earlier during the evening but I successfully talked myself out of it, every time until I went to bed…on my own, then I couldn’t resist anymore.”

At this, Ashlyn doesn’t answer; she just tightens the grip around Ali and holds her close, processing everything they’ve shared during a few short minutes.

 

“Do you want to talk? I mean about what happened, what I did, and where we are going from here?” Ali asks carefully when they have been quiet for a while.

“Yeah I want to, and we’ll definitely need it, but not right now. Can we just forget about all of it for a few days? I know we still have a long way to go and much to figure out. It won’t just work with us going back to where we were, living happily ever after you know. It will be hard but as of right now, I’m just happy to be here with you.”

“Okay, that’s fine with me. But just so you know, I really want to talk about it. I’m aware of what I did and I need to explain it. I don’t expect you to just forgive me because I got injured and stuff, I treated you terribly and I still need to prove that I deserve a second chance and to do that, you need to know why I did what I did,” Ali says, without breaking eyes with the blonde. “You are important to me Ash. This, you and me, are important,” she continues as she points between them.

“I know Ali, I know. And trust me, we will talk about it but not now,” the blonde simply says, not in a mood to take care of all their problems. “We should get something to eat, can you go down the stairs or do you want me to go down and get us something to bring up?”

“I really need to move so I’ll come with you, I might need some help though but I’m think you got it covered,” Ali says and squeezes the blonde’s biceps playfully. “And I got my crutches so I should be good.”

“Fine, let’s get dressed then,” Ashlyn says, aiming on them both being naked from the waist up. “Do you want something else than your pajamas?”

“I’ll keep my sweatpants on; just give me a hoodie from the drawer please,” the brunette says and smirks when Ashlyn tosses her one with a huge Penn State print all over the front. “Perfect, that’s my favorite.” Ashlyn shoots her a glare and grunts before she change into a clean shirt and a pair of Nike shorts.

“Whatever,” she says after a while. “Are you ready to go down? I’m still starving you know.”

“Yeah I am, and don’t look at me like that, I know someone that used to steel my Penn State sweaters all the time…” Ali teases as she jumps past the blonde on her crutches.

“That’s was NOT because the print on them, and you know that as well as I do,” Ashlyn defends herself with while walking after the brunette, making sure she’s not falling down the stairs.

When it has taken Ali at least a couple of minutes to get down the first few steps, Ashlyn gives up, grabs the crutches and putts them on the floor before she places herself on the step below Ali with her back against her. “Come on princess, we can’t waist the whole day getting you down the stairs,” she jokes.

“Seriously Ash, a piggy ride on your back down these stairs? Are you crazy?”

“You mean you don’t trust me,” the blonde responds with a hurt look on her face but can’t keep it straight for many seconds before giving Ali a smile, with dimple and everything.

“Shut it Harris,” she says as she successfully jumps up on her back. “Just remember you’re carrying something precious.”

They manage to get down the stairs without any accidents but instead of letting Ali down, the blonde carries her all the way to the kitchen. Ali’s about to crack a joke about them not being married yet but stops mid sentence when she sees her dad sitting by the table, drinking coffee and reading the newspaper.

“Oh, hi dad,” she says, still on the blondes back.

“Ehm, morning Mr. Kreiger. Just helping this one down the stairs,” with slightly red cheeks Ashlyn gets Ali down and helps her over to one of the chairs.

“Good morning girls, and Ashlyn, call me Ken, I think we got past the formalities when you called me and asked for permission to come see my daughter,” he says with a wink and Ali can’t keep herself from laughing at the now very embarrassed blonde.

“Yes sir…I mean Ken, got it,” she mumbles as she rubs her neck. “Eehm I should go up and take a quick shower before breakfast,” she says as she’s backing out of the kitchen. “I’ll be back in a moment,” and with this she’s gone and the two Krieger’s left in the kitchen looks at each other and chuckles before they fall into a comfortable silence.

“So…she makes you really happy, huh?” Ken finally says, looking at his youngest child with nothing but love in his eyes.

“Yes, she really does and I can’t believe how lucky I am, having her here. I thought I lost her forever,” Ali says with closed eyes as all kinds of emotions overwhelm her.

“You want to talk about it? I’ve seen and heard that you haven’t been yourself during the fall and first I thought it was because of the world cup and then being far from home but when Ashlyn called, I started to rethink,” he says while playing with the pen in his hand. “And just so you know, as long as you are happy, I’m happy to.”

“It’s just…I just…we started out as friends but during the spring it became…more, and then I screwed everything up after the world cup. I panicked, and thought I would get rid of that constant heaviness inside of me if I just got back to Germany but I ended up breaking both of our hearts instead,” she admits, embarrassed by her own actions. “We haven’t really been speaking since August, we…or I, tried a few times during camp but it didn’t end very well and then she comes her and I can’t believe she’s willing to give me a second chance, I don’t really deserve that,” tears are now streaming down her cheeks and she becomes even more embarrassed when she realizes it’s her dad she’s telling all of this.

To her surprise, he doesn’t mention it might be a little over the top to share with him, they’ve never been that close, instead he stands up and walks over to where she’s sitting across the table. He squats down next to her and takes one of her hands in his own, just like the day before. “Alex, I can see how much she means to you, and how much you mean to her. And I could definitely hear it when she called me. No matter what have been done, or said, in the past, that’s not what is most important now. Take care of this chance and make the most of it, I support you fully no matter who you choose to spend your life with, as long as you love that person and are loved back.”

With these words, Ali throws her arms around his neck and hugs him tightly, tears still falling down her cheeks. “Does mom know?” she asks into the crock of his neck.

“I think so. She hasn’t said anything to me but if I know that woman right, and I think I do, she has known from the beginning. She’s your mother and you have never been good at hiding things for her,” he says with a smile. “Even though you haven’t said a word about it, I’m pretty sure she somehow picked it up between the lines.”

With this, Ali giggles and releases the grip around his neck to look him in the eyes. “I think you are right, but I’ll talk to her when I get the chance, don’t say anything to her. And thank you for being the best dad in the world.”

Ken chuckles lightly as her stands up and strokes her on the top of her head. “Anything for you Alex, anything,” he says as he walks back to the other side of the table to take his coffee mug and carry it to the dishwasher. When he’s done, Ashlyn enters the kitchen again, newly showered with her still wet hair in a messy bun.

“Ehm, how’s it going down here?” she says, looking from father to daughter. She can immediately see that the brunette has been crying and she gets slightly worried for a second.

“Everything is fine, we just had a little chat about…life,” Ali answers with a wink at the blonde who gives her a smile in return.

“Well, I should get going. Enjoy your day, and…behave,” Ken says as he leaves the room with a light chuckle and a wink. You don’t need to be a genius to see where Ali’s genes came from.

 

The week goes by and the both women are enjoying their time together, Ali becomes more and more movable as the swelling settles and she also becomes grumpy over the upcoming surgery, is it really necessary now when she’s not in pain? Deep down she knows it is, the MRI didn’t lie, and her ACL and MCL are still very much torn which is tough to know mentally. It’s even tougher knowing the blonde won’t be there for the surgery.

They spend most of the week cuddled close together in bed, knowing they sooner or later need to have the talk before they once again go their separate ways. When it’s less than a day until Ashlyn’s plane is leaving for Florida, Ali decides to finally bring it up.

“What are we doing?” she says quietly when they are watching TV during the afternoon, her head resting on the blonde’s chest.

“What do you mean?” Ashlyn asks, somewhat confused.

“This, you and me, what are we doing? Are we back together? Are we just sleeping with each other? Or are we going to go back to not being anything the second you leave tomorrow? I need to know because I don’t think I can let you go without knowing,” the brunette rambles and Ashlyn silence her by pressing their lips together for a short moment before pulling away to make some space between them.

“You know, I was planning on making this hard for you. I was going to take this discussion, and I was going to make you fight for this. Fight for us and show me how much you want it,” the blonde says quietly, almost embarrassed to admit her originally plan. “But do you know what, screw that. We are too old to play some stupid game with each other’s feeling. Yes, you fucked up pretty bad last year, yes, you broke my heart completely, and yes, I understand that you want to explain why and everything but for me, that does not matter anymore. It was not just on you, I could have been more patient, I could have listen more to how you felt instead of pushing you to what I wanted,” she continues as and Ali’s tears are running, for what feels like the hundredth time the past one and a half week. The brunette makes an effort to start talking but Ashlyn holds up a finger to signal she’s not done.

“I’ve been trying so hard to forget you. I’ve been trying to forget what you feels like in my arms, how your lips feels against mine and how you body fits next to me when we fall asleep together. I’ve been trying to forget how your laugh can change my whole day, how your eyes lit up every time you smile and how that nose crinkle of yours is the most adorable thing I’ve ever seen. But I can’t, I can’t Al because you are everything I want, you are my soul mate, my better half, by best friend and the love of my life. I love you, I’m madly in love with you and I will be for the rest of my life. Nothing and no one will ever change that.”

Ali doesn’t say anything. What can she possibly say when the woman in front of her already has said it all. Ali was ready for a fight; she was ready to beg Ashlyn to forgive her. She was ready to be rejected, to hear that they probably should take it slow, start out as friends, real friends this time, and then see where it goes from there. Instead, the most humble, kind hearted and wonderful human being has decided that she, Ali Krieger, who is afraid of love, to give herself completely, and to let her walls down, are worth loving. Ashlyn Harris loves her and wants to be with her. What is there possibly left to say after this?

“I love you too Ash,” is all she manage to say before she throws her arms around Ashlyn’s neck. “I love you too, more than you’ll ever know and I will spend the rest of my life proving that I’m worth being loved by you,” she then mumbles into the crock of the blonde’s neck.

They hang on to each other, as their life depended on it, for a good five minutes and when they finally let go, they are both smiling like a couple of love struck teenagers but Ashlyn gets quickly serious as she takes the brunettes both hands in her own.

“I want to do it right this time. We’ve been out eating multiple times but I’ve never actually taken you on a proper date. We need to go on a date,” Ashlyn says with so much love on her voice that Ali’s taken aback. “Will you do me the honor and go on a date with me as soon as we get the chance?” she says, now with more confidence in her voice.

“Yes Ash, I’d love to,” the brunette answers, stroking Ashlyn’s cheek gently while smiling. “Are you still okay with us taking this slow though? I know a few of our friends know about…what happened, but I still think we need some time to figure it all out ourselves before everyone else gets to know. No matter how sure you are, we can’t just go back six month and pick up where we were when I left, that’s not fair to either of us.”

“I know, and I agree. This might not be as easy as I want it to be and I think you are right when you say we might need some time. Especially since we don’t really know what the future holds,” she says with a shrug. “Have you thought about what to do after the surgery?” she continues with a cautious look at the brunette, knowing it might be a sensitive subject.

“I was talking to Rick right after the MRI and I’ve been talking to the coaches and athletic training staff in Frankfurt as well and we all agree on that I should return to Germany during the spring. That will give me the chance to focus 100 percent on the rehab and I will do it in an environment where I feel comfortable and motivated. I’m still under contract with Frankfurt and they really want me there to follow my process. And before you say anything, I know I haven’t told you during the week but that’s because what you said, I didn’t want to take focus from being together with you again.”

“It’s fine Alex, you are telling me now, right? And I’ve already figured out that you probably would go back, and to be honest, I think that’s what best for you. There’s an upcoming Olympics to focus on and I know that being in Germany will provide you with the best chances to get back in time for that. We are going to make this work though; together we’ll find a way,” the blonde says with a shrug. “As much as I believe in you, I also believe in us.”

“What would I do without you Ash?” Ali says with a smile.

“Well, as of right now, you would be laying her on your own without anyone showing you how loved you are,” Ashlyn answers with a smirk on her face as she hovers over the brunette, gently titling her head to the side to get access to her sensitive neck. “No one would tell you how beautiful…gorgeous…amazing…and unbelievably sexy you are,” she says between the kisses she’s placing along her jaw line before reaching the corner of her mouth. “And no one would tell you how incredibly in love they are with you,” she finishes before crashing their lips together, letting her hands travel down the brunette’s body, rewarding her with a moan from the defender.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, time to try something new again. I have a pretty solid plan for this story and I definitely knows where I want to go but if this was YOUR story, what would happened next and where will their relationship take them? I'm curious to hear your thoughts and if anyone has a really good idea that fits into my plan, I might even end up throwing it into the mix :) 
> 
> Also, what's your favorite part of this chapter?


	9. I Love Every Single Part of You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ali surprises Ashlyn and gives them some valuable time together before she leaves for Germany.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here's a new chapter for you guys, I hope you'll like it! I have to admit that I've lost the motivation for writing a bit right now, I'm super busy in school and don't really have as much time for this as I would like. It's hard forcing yourself to write so I might end up taking a break for a while. Probably not a long break but I need to focus on something else (homework mostly) and I definitely need to find some inspiration again. Whit that said, I hope you'll be here when I return again.

Ashlyn is on her way up from the water when she hears her phone ringing. She jogs the last yards until she reaches the pile of clothes she left on the beach when she went out surfing and starts to toss them around in an attempt to find her phone before whoever is calling hangs up. She finally finds it in one of her socks, where she to be honest totally forgot she had put it, and smiles when she sees Ali’s face on her screen.

“Hi gorgeous,” she answers which forces a giggle out of the brunette.

“God morning Ash,” the brunette says before scanning Ashlyn more closely through the screen. “Oh, you’re out surfing. Did I interrupt you?”

“No, I was on my way out of the water when you called, otherwise I wouldn’t have heard the phone. I’m done for the day, been out here for a couple of hours now,” she says with a dreaming look out over the ocean.

“Couple of hours? It’s 8 am, most people are still asleep you know,” Ali says with a laugh.

“Not you apparently,” the blonde answers with a raised eyebrow. “How come?”

“Ehm…I booked my flight yesterday evening,” the brunette answers without looking Ashlyn in the eyes.

“Oh, so when are you leaving Washington?” a little sadness can be heard in the blonde’s voice but she tries not to show it, she knew it’s was only a matter of time before Ali decided to leave.

“Today,” Ali answers simply, waiting for the blonde’s reaction.

“What the fuck Alex, we talked about this. You aren’t supposed to leave for at least another week so I could come and see you on my way back to New York. What made you change your mind?” Ashlyn is all but calm and her mind is working a 100 miles per hour, not able to understand why the brunette would do this.

“Take it easy, I’m calling to hear what your plans are for today. I’m leaving DC at 11:50 and will arrive to Orlando at 2:10. I never said I’m leaving for Germany toady so do you think you could pick me up at the airport?” she says, trying to keep a straight face but fails when she sees the surprise on Ashlyn’s face and a huge grin takes over.

“You’re coming here?” the blonde asks in disbelief.

“Yes I do, or technically I’m flying down to visit my mom but I was thinking it could be nice to stop in Orlando for a few days first,” she says with a smirk. “Or what do you say?”

“I would say it’s a perfect idea,” Ashlyn finally says, now with a matching grin on her face. “And I’ll definitely be at the airport by 2 to pick you up. How’s the knee?”

“Uurgh, don’t talk about it, it still hurts so badly. Don’t know how I’m supposed to actually start with more intense rehab in a week,” Ali says with pain in her eyes. “If it was mentally hard before, it’s definitely physically hard now.” She’s three weeks out of surgery and the pain she’s feeling in the knee is worse than anything she ever experienced. “This is definitely my most painful surgery and I’ve had a few over the years.”

“I’m so sorry babe, hopefully it will get better soon,” the blonde says, painfully aware of the fact that she can’t do anything to take Ali’s pain away. “I know how much it sucks in the beginning but believe me, once it get better, you will feel like a new person,” she continues with a smile before they end the conversation. Both of them excided to see each other in only a few short hours, talking over Facetime is nowhere near enough when your whole body and mind is craving the other person.

 

Ashlyn hurries up to the house and jumps into the shower before she starts making breakfast. She was visiting her family for a few days after leaving Ali and before she went away for training camp with the national team and now she’s back again in between camps. This time in a rental house, an arrangement that gives her the opportunity to be close to her family, enjoying the ocean and the weather instead of staying alone in New York while she’s off WSP season. The house she’s renting is located only a few streets away from her grandparents and since it’s Saturday, she has been invited over to them for a BBQ night with the whole Harris family.

“Hi Grams, what are you up to?” she says when she’s calling to inform she unfortunately won’t be able to make it tonight.

“Hi sweetie, oh not much, I just started to prepare the food for tonight,” her grandmother answers. “It’s going to be so much fun having you all over.”

“Yes about that, I don’t think I’ll be able to make it, I’m sorry,” Ashlyn says and she honestly is. There’s nothing like a BBQ night with the Harris family.

“Oh, how come?” the disappointment in Grandma Harris voice is obvious.    

“Ehm, a friend just called and told me she’s on her way here so I need to pick her up on the airport and yeah…” the blonde says as she rubs her neck, not really sure how to explain the situation without saying too much.

“Ashlyn Michelle Harris, don’t you know all your friends are more than welcome here? Bring the girl for God sake,” her grandma says. “There is no chance that this friend happens to be Ali Krieger…huh?” she continues and Ashlyn can hear a smirk behind her voice.

“Why would you think that?” the blonde asks surprised. She had no idea her grandmother knew anything about her and Ali.

“Honey, I’ve helped raise you, I’ve seen you grow up and most important, I’ve seen you both happy and heartbroken. The truth is, I haven’t seen you as happy as you where when you came down here after visiting Ali since before that girl left for Germany last year. Does that answer your question?”

Ashlyn is stunned, but at the same time not surprised at all, there is no one on this earth that knows her as well as her grandmother does. “Yeah I guess it does,” she admits simply.

“Great, I’ll see you both tonight then. 6 pm, be on time,” her grandma finishes and hangs up before giving Ashlyn the chance to protest.

 _“Shit, Ali’s going to kill me,”_ the blonde thinks as she finishes her omelet and brings it with her, together with a cup of coffee, to the back porch to enjoy her breakfast in front of the ocean. When she’s done with her food, she takes a quick look at her watch, seeing it’s almost 10 which mean she has around 3 hours until she has to leave for the hour long drive to the airport. While enjoying the remaining coffee in her cup, she starts to make mental notes over what she needs to do before she leaves. First of all, look over the mess in the house, there are probably one or two piles of clothing she needs to move, as well as take out the trash and look over the fridge. Ali doesn’t need to know she has been eating Chinese for a few days now. In addition, she needs to change the sheets in her bed and the towels in the bathroom, after that the house should be ready for Ali. “Maybe some vacuuming too, just to be sure,” she says out loud before she gathers her things and walks inside to start checking off the list.

At 1:50, she’s standing at the airport waiting impatiently for Ali’s plane to land, on purpose a little early just in case. The screen says the flight is on time but the 20 minutes until it changes to _landed_ are painfully slow. When it finally does, Ashlyn is mentally jumping up and down in excitement, even though she knows it will be at least another 15 or 20 minutes until the brunette reaches her. At least now she knows Ali’s safe on the ground.

After almost 30 minutes of waiting and constantly checking every person walking through the doors, Ashlyn sees the familiar and very messy bun she’s been waiting for and she has to force herself not to sprint over to the woman on crutches. Instead she plays cool and waits for the brunette to come to her witch takes a while but from the moment Ali sees her, her whole face is a giant smile. Eventually, the blonde can’t resist and jogs the last bit, towards the flow of people, until she’s right in front of Ali.

“Hi babe,” she says quietly, not sure if she’s allowed to kiss her, huge her or just admire her.

“Hi,” Ali says as well before she leans in to rest her head against the blonde’s chest, not able to actually hug thanks to her crutches. “Please hold me Ash, I’ve missed you so much,” she whispers and the blonde isn’t late to obey her.

None of them really cares about the people around them but eventually, Ashlyn can feel the eyes on them and due to the fact that everyone has a camera in their pocket nowadays, she decides it’s for the best to break the hug and get going towards the baggage claim.

“I know you’ve missed me and believe me when I say I have as well but we should move towards the exit before anyone snaps a picture,” she says as she gives Ali’s cheek a gentle stroke.

“You’re right, I just…it’s so easy to get lost in you,” the brunette confesses with a shy smile. “I love you so much Ash.”

The blonde looks at the woman in front of her and can’t resist giving her a quick peck on the lips. “I love you too, Ali,” she simply says with a shrug. “Give me your bag so we can get out of here.”

When they finally have Ali’s two suitcases they walk outside, Ashlyn dragging both of them as well as she’s carrying one purse and one backpack. Luckily, her car is parked right outside the doors. “God Al, I know you’re going back to Germany but don’t you have your apartment will all your stuff there already?” she asks when she finally got everything loaded in the car.

“Of course I have, this is just what I took with me home for the break and the Olympic qualification, it’s not much,” she says with a grin. “Or have you been lazy with the lifting stud?” she asks and squeezes the blonde’s bicep playfully.

“Easy there princess, you’re already on crutches, don’t tease me too much,” Ashlyn says before starting the car to begin the trip back to the coast.

 

The ride is spent in anything but silent and even though they’ve talked every day since Ashlyn left, it’s a whole different story being able to talk face to face. Every time the blonde says something funny, Ali leans over and grabs her arm gently, rewarding her with her adorable laugh and her signature nose crinkle. Every now and then, Ashlyn takes her eyes of the road for a split second just to admire the woman next to her and every time, she’s taken aback by her beauty.

“I have to tell you something,” the blonde suddenly says. “And before you yell at me, I tried my best, or at least I tried, to get out of it.”

“What have you done?” Ali asks with a slightly horrified expression on her face.

“Well…I haven’t technically done anything but we are invited over to my grandparents for a BBQ tonight,” Ashlyn admits with her eyes fixed on the road.

“But that’s not so bad, it can be f…” the brunette says before Ashlyn interrupts her.

“With the rest of my family as well…”

“Oh…” Ali looks at her with her eyes wide. “You mean it’s time for me to meet the fam?” she says, both terrified and somewhat amused.

“Eehm…as I said, I tried to get us out of it but my grandma wasn’t having any of it. She even asked if the friend coming here was you,” Ashlyn says, a blush creeping up her cheeks.

“SHE ASKED WHAT?”

“Jeeez Alex, take it easy. I told her a friend is flying in and she said that my friends are always welcomed at their place and then she asked if this friend happened to be a certain Ali Krieger. I haven’t said a word about you or us, I promise.”

Ali is still in shock but the fact that Ashlyn’s grandma knew something about them is apparently more horrifying than her meeting the whole Harris family less than a month after they got back together. “Oh, wow…I didn’t see that one coming but I guess it’s the same as with my dad, and probably my mom as well. They know us well enough to just feel this sort of things,” she says thoughtfully.

“We don’t have to go, I can call and say you are delayed or something. It’s not a problem. I can understand if you don’t want to do this,” the blonde says with a shrug and a glance at Ali. “Or otherwise we can just play it off as we are friends. No one has to know anything else than that.”

“It’s okay Ash, I want to go, I want to meet all these people I’ve heard so much about but if it’s okay with you, I think I would like the friend part. I don’t think I’m ready to meet them as your…yeah as yours,” she says a little bit awkwardly after not knowing how to address them.

“As my _girlfriend_ Al, you’re definitely and very much my girlfriend,” Ashlyn says with a grin as she moves one of her hands from the steering wheel to Ali’s tight. “But it’s totally fine with me, being friends I mean, if it makes you feel more comfortable.”

“Yeah I think it does, thank you,” the brunette says as she cover Ashlyn’s hand with her own.

They ride the rest of the way in silence, both of them in their own thoughts and it’s not until they leave the mainland Ali breaks the silence. “Wow, it’s really beautiful here,” she says as she’s looking out through the window.

“Yeah I guess it is. Unfortunately you don’t really see it if you’re too familiar with it, it becomes ordinary after a while,” Ashlyn answers as she studies the view around them. “But to be honest, every time I come back here and drive over the bridge for the first time in a while, I’m sort of taken aback. Nothing will ever feel as much home as this place.” Ali’s watching the blonde as she talks about the small coast town and she can see in her eyes how much this place means to her. They sit in silence again for a while before Ashlyn finally slows down in front of a small beach house and enters the drive way.

“Welcome to what I call home for a couple of weeks,” she says with a grin as she stops the engine. “We have a couple of hours before we need to get going again, what do you want do?” she says when she opens the brunette’s door to help her out of the Jeep and then turn back to the trunk go get her belongings.

When Ali doesn’t answer she looks around the car, just to see her leaning on her crutches with a mischievous grin. “Oh I don’t know,“ she finally says with a shrug, grin still in place. “Maybe, take a nap…” she continues before she turns around to start crutching up to the front door.

Ashlyn is left with her jaw hanging but she recovers quickly, a matching smirk enters her face as she begins to drag Ali’s things towards the house. She knows exactly what the brunette has in mind and even if she wants the same just as much, they will have a lot of time for that kind of stuff later tonight. As of now, she wants to show Ali a part of her world.

When she catches up on Ali, waiting by the front door, she gives her a smile and a quick kiss. “We’ll see about that princess,” she says as she unlocks the door to let them in.

 

They does not end up in bed, instead they walk outside to sit on the back porch for a while. “You really love this place, huh?” Ali asks as they sit next to each other.

“It’s home,” the blonde simply says. “You want to go down to the beach?” she then asks.

“Ehm, I’m on crutches Ash, how am I supposed to take a walk in the sand with them?” Ali says laughing.

“Duh, who said anything about a walk? And by the way, haven’t we solved a problem like this before?” Ashlyn says with a chuckle. “I will just give you a piggy ride and then we sit down.”

Ali can’t do anything but laugh at the smiling blonde and without thinking twice, she agrees. Even though she knows it might not be the best idea considering her knee.

 

A few minutes before 6 o’clock they stand outside Ashlyn’s grandparent’s house, Ali somewhat nervous.

“You ready?” the blonde asks gently.

“Yeah, let’s do this,” she says as she squeezes Ashlyn’s hand one last time before they enter the house, pretending to be just friends.

Once inside they are greeted by everyone and Ashlyn presents Ali as “her friend from the national team”. Everyone welcomes her without any questions, except Grandma Harris who gives Ashlyn a knowing look and a raised eyebrow. When they walk past the older woman she grabs the blonde by her arm and squeezes her gently.

The night goes on and the two women are really enjoying their time with the Harris family. Ashlyn watches Ali as she’s talking to her grandma and the two women seems to get along well which makes her love for the defender grow even stronger. However, she get a little bit worried when she sees the older woman lean forward to whisper something in the brunette’s ear, whose eyes goes wide before she lets out her signature laugh and leans in as well to whisper something back. Except that exchange, which Ashlyn has a feeling involves herself, no one in her family seems to notice the smiles the both women share when their eyes happens to meet from across the room or the hand the blonde leaves on the small of Ali’s back just a little too long when they exchange a few words in the kitchen. And if anyone does, they don’t say a word about it.

“How was your night?” Ashlyn asks when they drive the short way home. They would’ve walked and enjoyed the warm evening if Ali hadn’t been on crutches.

“It was wonderful, I really love your grandma,” the brunette answers. “And the rest of your family as well of course, they all love you very much.”

“Speaking of my grandma, what did she say to you?” the blonde asks curiously but Ali just gives her a confused look.

“When?” she asks.

“At the back porch, she whispered something to you and you looked a little bit shocked at first,” Ashlyn says, a little embarrassed when she realizes it will sound like she kept track of Ali’s every move, something she will probably not like. Luckily, the brunette doesn’t take it that way.

“Oh you mean you were checking me out during the evening,” she playfully says with a smirk.

“Of course I did, I’m always checking you out, you’re the sexiest person in the room no matter where we are,” Ashlyn simply answers with a shrug. “But honestly, what did she say to you? Do I need to talk to her?” she continues, a little bit worried.

“Relax; she just said we’re making a cute couple. And that she hopes I can make an honest woman out of you,” Ali says with a grin and slightly red cheeks after the compliment from the blonde. “She really is adorable, she knows you so well, and she loves you endlessly.”

“Oh. My. God. She can be a bit embarrassing from time to time,” Ashlyn says as she hides her face in one hand with the other still on the steering wheel. “But yes, she really is something special and I have her to thank for everything. She’s the reason I am who I am today.”

 

They fall in silence as Ashlyn once again parks the car at the drive way before she hurries around it to hold the door open for the brunette, helping her out and gives her the crutches. They walk up to the door and into the house before Ali breaks the silence. “If I hadn’t been in this damn brace right now, I would throw myself at you,” she says with a smirk. “But I don’t think would be one of my smartest moves.”

Ashlyn watches the brunette as she closes the door and walks up to her, cupping her face gently, giving her a quick peck on the lips. “There is so much I would do right now if you weren’t in that damn brace,” she copies Ali’s words as her lips ghosts over her pulse point quickly. “But unfortunately you are so I guess that have to wait.”

“But we can still…” the brunette manages to get out in a desperate voice before Ashlyn interrupts her by crashing their lips together.

“Forget what I said, there are still a lot of things we can do,” she mumbles as she simply lifts the smaller woman up and carries her towards the bedroom, careful not to hurt her knee.

 

Hours later they lay next to each other with Ali’s head resting on the blonde’s chest. “I’m sorry I couldn’t do much,” she says slightly embarrassed, aiming on the fact that the circumstances didn’t allow any wilder activities in bed.

Ashlyn chuckles as she kisses the top of Ali’s head. “Don’t worry babe, there will be plenty of time for that when you’re back on track again.”

“Yeah…but I wanted to show you how much I love you, not just lay here.”

“Oh you mean you didn’t enjoy the four orgasms I gave you when you were just “laying there”, huh?” the blonde says and tries to keep a straight face, knowing the defender will be very much embarrassed by this question.

She’s right, a blush starts to creep up Ali’s neck and cheeks immediately and she hides her face in her hands. “I didn’t mean it like that,” she mumbles, so quiet that Ashlyn barely hears it. “I just mean that…it feels like I’m using you, like you are so kind and loving and that I can’t give anything back.”

The blonde gently moves away from underneath Ali’s head to get some space between them. She sits up and asks the brunette to do the same before she takes her hands and holds them tightly as she looks her in the eyes. “Babe, I don’t care. I’m not in this for the sex, well maybe a little because our sex is fucking amazing, but anyway, that’s not the point. I’m in this because I love you, which means I love you on your good days as well as on your bad. I love you when you’re injured and when you’re not. I love every part of you Alex,” she says as she kisses her softly. “My favorite thing about you is definitely that smart head of yours, and your princess side. But I’m just as much in love with your sad parts, and your dark parts, your sexy parts, and your confident parts. I love when you are vulnerable, and when you are serious, when you laugh until you cry, and when you cry until you laugh. I love the happy Alex and I love the angry Alex. No matter what, I love every single part of you.”

At the time she’s done, Ali’s crying and before Ashlyn can react, she slaps her upper arm semi-hard.

“Ouch, what was that for?” the blonde says confused.

“I’ll never get the chance to say all those beautiful things to you because you always end up saying them first,” Ali says between sobs. “For once, I would like to be the one telling you how loved you are, how much I admire you both as a player and as a person. I want to be the one telling YOU that you are my world because you deserve to hear that. You deserve to hear how funny and goofy you are, how much I appreciate your kindness and your beautiful heart. You deserve the world Ash but I never get the chance to tell you that because you are you. Because you always beat me to it, because you always make sure that I know how loved I am. For once, I want to tell you that I love you endlessly, that I love you every second, every minute, every hour of every day,” she rambles and if Ashlyn hadn’t silent her with a kiss, she would have kept going the whole night.

“Al, breath,” she says when she leans back again, tears streaming down her cheeks. “You will pass out if you don’t allow yourself to breath.”

Somehow, a conversation about Ali not feeling like she is enough when it comes to them having sex has turned into a conversation about Ali being pissed over the fact that Ashlyn loves her.

“I just love you so much, and even though I don’t deserve it, you love me back and sometimes I can’t wrap my head around that,” she looks at the blonde with nothing but pure love in her eyes. “I love you and I told you I would spend the rest of my life proving that but you never give me the chance to do that.”

“I know you love me, otherwise you wouldn’t have come here before leaving. You wouldn’t have spent the whole evening with my family, talking to my grandma as you’ve known her for years. You wouldn’t have spent your last days in the states with me instead of going directly to Miami and your family if you didn’t love me Al. You don’t have to tell me, what you do for me is more than enough.”

Ali doesn’t answer; instead she’s quiet for a while as they once again lay down next to each other. When she finally speaks it’s so quiet Ashlyn has to ask her to repeat it.

“I asked if you want to come with me to Miami, I’m planning on telling my mom about us and I would really like to have you there,” she says a little bit louder but still without looking at the blonde.

“You want me there? Are you sure about that?” Ashlyn asks cautiously.

“Yes, I want her to meet you, to see with her own eyes just how amazing you are,” she says before she realizes that the blonde might not be on the same page as she is. “If you want to I mean, if not, it’s totally okay of course.”

The blonde can hear that Ali’s self-esteem went out through the window again and she smiles as she places a gently kiss on her head. “I’d love to,” she says with confidence.

“You sure?”

“Yes I am. I’d love to meet your mom and if it makes you feel better, I’d love to be there when you tell her about us,” the blonde ensures her. “When do we leave?”

“Well, my flight to Frankfurt leaves Miami on Tuesday, so what about tomorrow night?” they haven’t talked about for how long Ali is staying but the blonde didn’t think she would leave so soon. “That will give us Monday and a bit of Tuesday there.”

“Yeah that sounds good,” the blonde says a lot less enthusiastic now when she knows how little time they have left together. There never seems to be enough time and Ashlyn can already feel how much she will miss holding the defender tightly, kissing her, going to bed as well as waking up next to her. She will miss everything about the brunette and the fact that they will be a whole ocean apart, and not only a few states, makes it so much harder.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you like it even though it feels like some sort of "in between" chapter. 
> 
> What's your favorite part?


	10. You're Good To Her

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's time for the second "meeting the parent" moment.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back guys! After a much needed break from this story, I got the motivation back and this chapter basically wrote itself. Suddenly, I had been writing almost 7000 words and decided to split it into two chapters instead so as I'm posting this, chapter 11 is almost done and should be up within the next couple of days. Hope you are sticking with me and will continue to follow this story.

“I kissed a girl and I liked it, the taste hmm, duuh du dudu, I kissed a girl just to try it…” Ashlyn is singing her heart out along with the radio while she drums her fingers against the steering wheel.

Ali can’t do anything but laugh at the goofy blonde beside her. “You are too much sometimes, you know that right?” she says with a grin.

“What? I like the song…” Ashlyn says, smirking. “And it’s true so what can I say.”

They’re in the car on their way down to Miami to see Ali’s mom and even though she would never admit it, the blonde is nervous. She has never been good with the whole “meeting the parents” thing, and the fact that it went really well with Ali’s dad doesn’t soother her. It can’t be that easy twice, right?

“You’re impossible,” Ali laughs as she places on of her hands on Ashlyn’s tight, squeezing gently. “Thank you for doing this, for coming with me.”

“Well, I get to spend a few more days with a really cute girl so I’m not one to complain,” the blonde answers as she places her own hand over Ali’s. “No but seriously, I’m glad you asked me. I’m really looking forward to meet your mom.”

“I think she’s looking forward to meet you too, she didn’t really sound surprised when I told her you would come with me,” Ali says. She can feel the blonde’s nervousness and tries to calm her a bit. She’s turning her hand around and intertwines their fingers, squeezing Ashlyn’s hand before they continue to drive in silence, with the music taking over the car.

 

“AAAALLLLLEEEEEEEEXXXXX,” Ali has not more than jumped out of the car before the front door slams open and an overly excited voice yells her name. Her head snaps up immediately as she turns around to see Kyle jogging toward her and her whole face lights up within a heartbeat.

“KYLE, what are you doing here?” she drops her bag and jumps towards him, dropping her crutches as well as she throws her arms around his neck. “Oh my god, I’ve missed you so much,” she continues before he has a chance to answer her.

Ashlyn stands a little bit behind, not wanting to interrupt the moment between the two siblings. She knows how much Kyle means to Ali and vice verse and she knows they haven’t seen each other in a while.

“Well, when you told me you would come here before you left for Germany I realized how much I miss you and that I really wanted to see you before you left so I decided to come here too,” with a smile similar to Ali’s he’s grinning at his younger sister, who now have released her death grip around his neck and stands on her own in front of him. When he throws a glance over Ali’s shoulder, he sees Ashlyn, who he has heard everything about, both good and bad, for over a year now, yet it’s the first time they’re meeting in person.

Without thinking twice, he walks past Ali and approaches the blonde. “Hi, you must be the one Ali talked about until my ears fell off, about half a year ago” he says with a grin from ear to ear. “I’m the one who’s going to hunt you down if you ever hurt my baby sister,” he continues as he gives Ashlyn his hand to shake. “Kyle Krieger.”

The blonde stands frozen, just watching the man in front of her, who she clearly already knew was Kyle, but she manage to compose herself quickly and takes his hand in a firm grip. “Ashlyn Harris, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I’m the one who’s planning on making your sister happy as long as we’re both breathing,” she says with a matching grin.

“Oh, that was a good one, I already like you. Welcome to the family,” he answers before turning back to Ali who has been watching the exchange between her girlfriend and brother, somewhat shocked. “I think I accept her,” he says and gives Ashlyn a tap on the shoulder as he shoots Ali a wink.

The brunette is watching the door anxiously, hoping her mom isn’t standing close enough to hear the conversation that just went down. She really wants to tell her mom about the two of them on her own terms and as if Kyle can read her thoughts, he walks back to her and gives her another hug. “Mom is still at the backyard, she has no idea you are here. Don’t worry; I wouldn’t say anything in front of her.”

Ali gives him a weak smile before they start to collect their belongings, or Ashlyn and Kyle does while Ali starts to jump towards the door. She already has enough to do with herself and her crutches. When they are all inside, they make their way through the house until they reaches the veranda door, walking back out again to the beautiful back yard where the siblings mom and step dad are sitting in the sun.

“Alex, you are here,” Deb is on her feet within seconds and almost jogs towards her daughter. “How are you? How is the knee? How was the ride? Are you hungry? Can I get you something to drink?” her questions never stops and Ashlyn chuckles to herself, now she knows who Ali got her rambling habits from.

Deb picks up on the light chuckle behind Ali and notice Ashlyn for the first time. “Oh God, I’m so sorry. You must be Ashlyn,” she says with a warm smile as she, just as Kyle did, walks past a slightly shocked Ali.”It’s so nice to finally meet you, I’ve heard so much about you.”

Ashlyn chuckles again as she can see Ali blush, within minutes both her brother and her mom has pointed out that the defender talks a lot about the blonde keeper. “It’s nice to meet you too Mrs. Christopher and I’ve heard a few words about you as well.”

“Pleas, call me Deb. And I hope you’ve only heard good things but since I know you’ve heard them from Alex, I’m not so sure,” she says with a wink and Ali’s sticking out her tongue towards her mother’s back.

The four of them, the siblings step dad left for an afternoon at the gold course right after they came, sits down in the lounge area at the sun deck and Ali is eager to catch up with her mom as well as brother and Ashlyn participates and enjoys the conversation from the very beginning. She soon finds out that Ali is a younger version of her mother in almost every way possible and she’s amazed to see them all interact together. She has a blast and within minutes she feels like a part of the family.

“Ash, do you want to help me with the luggage inside, Ali has brought way too much for me to take care of on my own,” Kyle suddenly says and nods towards to house.

“Ehm, yeah of course,” she answers, not really sure why they have to do this right now but when she sees Kyle look, which travels between Ali and Deb, she understands that he wants to give the two women some time alone.

“Great let’s go,” he says and they leave the sun deck and walks inside.

“She’s really happy you know…” Kyle states as soon as the door shuts close behind them.

“Yeah…I try my best to keep her mind off of her knee and the long and hard journey she has ahead,” she shyly says, trying to take the focus from what she thinks Kyle is implying, something he’s not buying at all.

“You know that’s not what I mean. And I also know about everything that went down between the two of you. Ali can be…hard to understand sometimes, but all of that is in reality only her own fears that gets the best of her,” he says as he watches the two women he cares so much about through the windows. “She loves you more than she has loved anyone before and if I know my sister at all, that terrifies her. She’s not always the best with her feelings.”

Ashlyn is stunned. She knew the two siblings were close but not like this and she don’t know what to say to the man standing next to her.

“Do you know she called me that night? After you went out during camp in Florida?” Kyle asks when he understands that Ashlyn don’t know what to say.

“Wait, what? When?” she ask curiously without being able to put the pieces together.

“That night, after you kissed her,” he replies and her eyes goes wide as she realizes what he is talking about.

“Ooh, no I didn’t know that,” she simply says. “What did she say?” she asks with one eye brow raised.

“Well, that’s between me and Alex but I can tell you that I understood already back then that you were truly special to her, and I’m honestly sorry for everything you went through because of her insecurities, it killed me to see her like that so I can only imagine how you felt,” he says with a sincerely smile. “I’m glad you sorted it out though and I’m so very thankful that you are back in her life. Not even a really serious knee injury can take the light out of her eyes when you are around,” he continues as he nudges Ashlyn with his elbow. “You’re good to her.”

Still speechless, Ashlyn does the first thing that plops up in her mind, she wraps her arms around Kyle and gives him a bone crushing hug before she’s finally able to speak. “Thank you Kyle, you saying all of this means the world to me.”

“No problem, I just got myself another little sister to look out for,” he says, hugging her back just as tightly.

 

Meanwhile on the sun deck, Ali and her mom continue the conversation and the subjects follow each other with ease, just as always. After talking about a particularly funny memory they are both catching their breath and a moment of silence occurs. Ali lets her mind wander for a second and as she’s takes in the surroundings, a picture of Ashlyn together with her brother and mom appears in her head and she can’t resist smiling.

“You look really happy Alex, despite the circumstances,” Deb says and brings Ali back to reality.

“What can I say, I guess I have a lot to be happy for,” Ali simply answers and decides that this is the moment. “I have a wonderful family, I have Germany to go back to, I have a team there waiting for me, I have a second family in the national team, but most important…I have someone that I love unconditionally, a someone that loves me back just as much,” she says and a blush starts creeping up her neck and cheeks. She can see a mild surprise in her mother’s eyes before the pieces fall into place, a smile starts showing in the corner of her mouth and tears forming in her eyes.

“Oh Alex, I’m so happy for you. From what I have seen, Ashlyn is an amazing person and she seems to treat you wonderfully,” she says before walking over to where Ali’s sitting to give her a hug. “And I want you to know that no matter who you love, you’re just as much my Alex as you’ve always been. I will always support you in everything you do and I will always love you.”

“Thank you mom,” Ali says with her own tears now streaming down her face. “Thank you for being the best mom possible, I love you so much.”

“Always Alex, always,” Deb is hugging her daughter tightly and gives her a kiss on top of her head. “But now, tell me how all of this happened. How long has it been going on?”

“Well, the simple answer would probably be over a year,” she says and Deb’s eyes goes wide. “I think I’ve loved her from the moment I lay my eyes on her but I had a hard time figuring out what I was feeling and we started out as friends. Noting more happened until last spring when I realized that I love her more than as just a friend,“ she continues with a shy smile. She has always been close to her mom and she’s both embarrassed for not telling her all of this sooner as well as for talking about it at all since she knows she has to tell her everything.

“You mean you’ve been in a relationship for almost a year without telling me,” Deb says and Ali can see how hurt she is.

“No, it’s not that easy,” she says and then tells her mom about everything that happened. From the chaos after the world cup and she walking away without looking back, to how awfully alone she felt in Germany and how much she missed the blonde keeper and eventually about her waking up at her dads house, finding Ashlyn next to her bed.

“Oh, honey,” is everything Deb says but Ali can’t look at her, knowing how disappointed she will be. She and Ali’s dad did not raise their children to run from their problems. “Alex, why didn’t you talk to me?” she asks.

“Because I didn’t know what to say or how to explain it, I still wasn’t completely sure how I felt about everything and I was terrified over the feelings I had for Ash,” Ali confesses, eyes begging for forgiveness. “She is so sure about herself, she knows who she is and she is proud of it. I’m not, I’m not sure and I’m not proud. Or at least I wasn’t a few month ago,” she continues with a shrug. “I love her so much and she’s been wonderful through everything. I never thought she would forgive me, and frankly, I still don’t think I deserve her forgiveness but she did and I’m so very thankful for it.”

“I have to say that I’m not completely surprised, I’ve had my suspicions to be honest. Seeing you talk about her, eyes all bright, and hearing your voice when you told me something about her have got me to wonder but I didn’t want to ask because I figured you would tell me when you felt ready,” Deb says. “Today I’ve seen the way she looks at you and I can, without doubt, say that you are incredibly loved by her. Same thing applies to her, I’ve never seen you look at someone as you look at her and I’m so very happy for the both of you.”

The both women cries together for a moment before the door opens and Kyle and Ashlyn are coming back out. Ali wipes her tears and gives the blonde a small smile to let her know everything is fine. Deb gives her daughter a final squeeze before letting go and Ali stands up, waiting for the blonde to reach her. “I love you so much,” she says before giving her a bone-crushing hug and Ashlyn glances over the brunette’s shoulder at Deb who’s just smiling.

When Ali let go she turns them both around to face her mother, “I think a new introduction might be appropriate. Mom, this is Ashlyn, my girlfriend,” she says with a grin and the blonde can feel a heat reach her cheeks as she smiles sheepishly towards the woman she spent over an hour trying to impress without being too obvious. Deb returns the smile and are about to say something when Kyle interrupts.

“Okay, I think I’ve had enough of this love party now. Let’s do something that I can be a part of,” he says with a grin. “You two are too cute, I feel sick to my stomach,” he continues and pretends to gag.

“KYLE!” Deb says in a sharp voice. “How old are you?”

“Not old enough apparently,” Ali mutters as she gives her brother a death glare. “I’m sorry Ash that was Kyle five years old, he shows up from time to time, taking control over adult Kyle’s body,” she continues sarcastically before the four of them continues inside to make dinner.

 

Tuesday morning comes way too soon and when Ashlyn wakes up with Ali tightly wrapped in her arms, the sun has not fully risen but enough to cast rays of sun into the room. She takes in the sight before her with a sad smile, knowing it is their last morning together and a tear finds its way down her cheek. The beauty beside her is everything she ever wanted and she can’t with words describe how much it hurts seeing her leave for the other side of the world. She study Ali in her sleep, her face is relaxed and peaceful, her lips slightly parted and the only thing moving is her chest rising and falling as she slowly breaths. Ashlyn traces her fingers over the brunette’s strong body, feeling her toned muscles underneath the skin. She trails the cursive letters forming the beautiful tattoo over her ribs and continues down over her hip. After a few minutes, Ali starts to stir and lets out a soft moan when she feels the blonde’s fingers roaming over her body.

“Good morning beautiful,” Ashlyn says as she kisses her forehead and hugs her tighter.

“Mmh-mm…morning baby,” Ali mumbles with a sleepy smile. “Yesterday was just…wow,” she continues as she feels the blonde’s naked body pressed against her own.

“Yesterday? I would probably say this morning babe, we’ve only been sleeping for a couple of hours,” Ashlyn answers with a grin.

“Yesterday, morning, night, whatever…it was still amazing,” Ali says with a soft smile, a smile that suddenly dies when she realizes what day it is.

Ashlyn can see when the realization hits her and she quickly covers the brunette’s lips with her own before she pulls away slightly, allowing her eyes to show all the love she has for the women next to her. “Please don’t think about it now Al, just…leave it and let us have this moment,” she whispers slowly as she tucks away a loose strand of brown hair behind Ali’s ear. “Please.”

Ali just nods and turns around to face Ashlyn, kissing her slowly before she snuggles closer and hides her face against the blonde’s chest. They lay there in silence, taking in the presence of each other, the feeling of having your loved one close, the bliss of a moment that will not happen for the next couple of months.

It’s Ali who finally breaks the silence. With a sigh, she breaks free from Ashlyn’s embrace and rolls over to lie on her back, watching the ceiling. “This sucks…” she says without looking at the blonde next to her.

Ashlyn can’t hold back a chuckle even though she knows Ali’s serious, something that earns her a cold look from the brunette. “I know babe, I know exactly how much it sucks but we can’t really do anything about it. I’m just so glad I got to spend these last days with you,” she says to save herself, still with a small smile in the corner of her mouth.

“Whatever,” Ali mutters as she continues the stair at the ceiling. “I’ve changed my mind; I don’t want to go back to Germany.”

“Alex,” now it’s Ashlyn who sighs. “I know it’s hard to leave everything, your home, your family, and your friends. But on the long term, you know as well as I do that this is the best and only option. You will not have the same opportunities here; you will not have the same motivation. You have to go Alex and you know it,” she continues slightly harsher than intended which catches Ali’s attention.

“You Ash, you are the one thing I’m going to miss the most,” she says with a hurt look. “You didn’t even mention yourself, except for me this is all about us. But you are right, I know I have to do this, otherwise I’m not sure I’ll ever play soccer at a professional level again,” the hurt look is now replaced with sadness but also determination. Ashlyn can see how the light slowly makes its way back to Ali’s eyes.

“I don’t want to spend our last day together fighting over this but I need to tell you one more thing before I’m going to leave this for the rest of the day so listen carefully,” Ashlyn takes a deep breath as she, with a finger under her chin, forces Ali to meet her eyes. “You Alex are the strongest women I’ve ever met, but not just that. You are humble, inspiring, and when you love something you love it with all of your heart. You love soccer, and therefore I’m absolutely sure you will be back in no time. If anyone can do it, it’s you. I believe so much in you and if you believed just half as much in yourself, you would realize that too,” she finishes and tries to keep a straight face to show Ali that she is absolutely serious but the look on the brunette’s face makes it impossible and a grin takes over. “You are also the cutest human being I’ve ever met,” she says before leaning in and placing a soft kiss on Ali’s lips.

“I’m not even going to say anything Ash. I’m just going to lay here with you and enjoy this moment because you are everything I want and need,” Ali says with tears in her eyes as she once again snuggle closer to Ashlyn and lets herself get lost in her warm and safe embrace.

 

When the afternoon comes, it’s time for Ali to leave and they are driving to the airport together with Deb and Kyle. When she has been checked in she takes a moment with her mom and brother, Ashlyn waits at a distance to give the family some time alone. After a few moments she can see them finish up their hugs and Ali waves her over as the others leaves in order to now give the two women some private time.

“God, I didn’t think it would be this hard,” Ali sighs as she places her hands on the blonde’s chest, leaning in to rest their foreheads together.

“I know babe, but think of it this way, for every day that passes, we are one day closer to see each other again,” Ashlyn answers in an attempt to keep their moods up.

At this, Ali can’t resist laughing and she feels relived over the fact that Ashlyn can make her laugh when all she wants to do is cry. “You are so corny,” she says as she gives her a quick peck on the lips, not wanting to show off too much in public.

“I’m only corny for you babe, only for you,” Ashlyn replies with a grin all over her face. “You need to get going now; we don’t want you to miss your plane,” she continues, now with a little bit more sadness in her voice.

Ali sighs again before she looks around, there are people all over the place but everyone seems focused on themselves and not the two women standing somewhat aside. “Fuck it…” she whispers before she throws her arms around Ashlyn’s neck, crashing their lips together and kisses her as if there is no tomorrow. They hold on to each other for what feels like an eternity before Ali slowly withdraws, cheeks red and lips swollen.

“I couldn’t leave you without giving you something worth remember,” she says with a wink before she grabs her backpack and crutches and makes her way over to the security line, leaving a stunning Ashlyn with her jaw dropped.

When she finally snaps back to reality she can’t stop herself from jogging over to where Ali now is waiting in line. She stops in front of her, cupping her cheeks and holding her gaze before giving her a final kiss. “I love you Alexandra Blaire Krieger, and I can’t wait for you to come back home to me,” she says and for the first time since they entered the airport, tears are streaming down their cheeks. “Have a safe flight and text me as soon as you land.”

“I love you too Ash, so much,” Ali says sadly before she’s forced to make her way forward in the line, away from Ashlyn who’s standing and watching when the love of her life disappears among the rest of the people on their way through the security lines.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know if you're still with me guys!


	11. Well, Fuck This...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Will they make the Olympic roster or not?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here’s the next chapter as promised, and it became longer than I intended but hopefully you like it just as much as I do. Thank you for your comments and kudos, that's what makes me motivated to continue this story.

The first month is hard. Ali’s doing rehab and treatment from early morning to late afternoon six days a week and even though she has her team around, the injury has taken her away from the sport she loves the most and made her into an individual athlete. After an early treatment session in the morning, she hits the weight room for her rehab, weight training and fitness on the bike before it’s time for lunch and then she end the day with a second session of treatment during the afternoon. The highlights of her weeks is the Sundays when the team is playing and she has a day of, as well as the hour long Skype date she has with Ashlyn three times a week.

Today is one of those days and after a particularly tough day at the training facility, Ali is looking forward to talk to her favorite blonde. She showers quickly when she gets home, makes some pasta and settles down in the couch to wait for the incoming call. After a while, fifteen minutes after their scheduled time, her computer indicates the call and she greets Ashlyn with a huge smile when her face shows up on the screen.

“Hi princess, you look happy today. Had a good day at rehab?” the blonde says as she admires Ali where she’s sitting crossed-legged in the couch, her hair up in a messy bun, sweaters and a Frankfurt t-shirt on and the now empty bowl of pasta in her hands.

“Urgh, don’t talk about it,” Ali says and her happy expression is replaced by a groan. “Honestly, it was awful. But I knew I would go home and see your pretty face afterwards, which made the day so much better,” she continues, smile back at her lips. “How was your morning practice?”

With the six hour time difference between Frankfurt and New York, it’s only noon where Ashlyn is while it’s evening in Germany. “It was good, nothing to tough since we’re taking it a little bit easy now,” she says with a shrug. “I need to let my body rest in between camps so we decided to do a week and a half of light training now before we kick in another gear before the April camp.”

“That sounds great, when are you going down to Florida?” Ali asks, sad that she won’t be a part of the camp along with her teammates and friends.

“Camp starts the 18th so I’ll probably go down a week or so before. It’s not like I have anything to do here since they’ve canceled the season and it doesn’t really matter where I am while doing my individual training,” the blonde says, bummed over the fact that she won’t play any club soccer this year thanks to all the problems with the WPS.

They continue to talk about everything and anything for a while before Ashlyn has to go, she has a second practice scheduled for the afternoon and she has not had the time to eat yet.

“I love you Alex, next time we talk I promise you I’ll have more time,” she says apologetically, knowing how much Ali’s looking forward to their usually hour long Skype date.

“No problem, I know you have a ton of things to do. Text me when you get back from practice, and I love you too, more than you know,” Ali says before she hangs up and closes the computer screen. She remains sitting in the couch for a while, staring into the void while thinking about everything she’s missing out on around the national team.

 

They make it through another month with uncountable rehab sessions for Ali, a training camp with the national team for Ashlyn and numerous Skype call between the two of them. Suddenly, it’s the beginning of May and it’s time for Ali to starts packing her bags to go back home to the U.S. in order to attend camp and continue her rehab around the girls and the national team’s training staff. To say she’s excited is an understatement and she can’t wait to be back with her friends and family. She desperately needs a change of scenery, something new to motivate her in order to have a chance to get back in time to the Olympics. Doing rehab as a full time job has been the toughest journey she has ever been on. She had no idea there was even a possibility to get so tired, both mentally and physically, as she has been during the last couple of months but finally it’s time for a change.

When she arrives to the airport in DC, her dad is there to pick her up. Camp doesn’t begin in another week and she spends a few of these days wth her dad and brother, and then she drives up to New York to see Ashlyn before they both take off to New Jersey and the preparation camp for the Olympics.

The two women has been longing each other for the past two months and when Ashlyn’s phone finally goes off and Ali’s face shows up on her screen, she jumps out of the couch while she answers.

“Hi babe, are you here?” she asks before Ali has the chance to say anything.

The brunette laughs at her eager girlfriend when she answers her. “Yes I am, just parked. Can you unlock the door for me please?”

“Yes of course, do you need help with your stuff?” the blonde asks since she knows Ali isn’t a light packer.

“Nah, I’m good. Just let me in and I’ll be up in a moment.”

 

During the roughly three days they have together before leaving for New Jersey, they barely leave the apartment. They hardly leave the bed and when they do, it’s to get something from the fridge to eat in order to keep their energy level up.

“Wow, if this is what happens when I’m leaving you for two months, I think I might be up for doing that again,” Ali says teasingly when they are lying in bed, legs tangled together. It’s their last day together, just the two of them, tomorrow morning they are doing the hour long drive down to Princeton to meet up with the team.

“Oh no princess, don’t even go there. I’ll never let you out of my sight from now on. I’ll just have to follow you because I would not be able to stand another two months without you. Heck, I don’t think I would manage a week to be honest,” she says with a sheepishly smile.

Ali doesn’t answer right away because she knows the odds for them being separated again when camp ends are quite low. If they both don’t make the roster, it will definitely happen and if she doesn’t, she’ll go back to Germany again to continue the hard work toward a comeback.

“I’m just kidding Ash,” she finally says with a smile, “I don’t want to spend another day with a whole ocean separating us either.”

“Good, then let’s do our best to prevent that from happening again,” Ashlyn simply answers. “Now, we should get out of this bed and go grab some breakfast, I’m starving.”

 

She’s thrilled to be back. Missing out on several camps during the winter and spring has made her miss not only the soccer itself, but the girls most of all. There is nothing as uplifting as being around them and she spends most of her spare time during the first couple of days with catching up with all of them.

She’s rooming with HAO as usual and the first night she fills her in on how things are going between herself and Ashlyn.

“It really is good, even though I wish I could have had her around during the past months. I’ve been missing her so incredibly much,” she admits with a shy smile.”I never thought I could feel this strongly for anyone.”

“I’m so glad for you guys. I don’t know two people that deserve each other as much as you do,” Heather says with a warm smile.

“I love her. I love her with everything I have and when I woke up at my dads, seeing her sitting next to my bed, I don’t think I have ever felt such a relief ever before. I didn’t know where we had each other but just her being there meant everything to me,” Ali shrugs and smiles at the memory.

“I’m glad you got your shit together and solved it, you are clearly meant to be together,” she replies with a laugh. “So, out of curiosity, who else on the team knows about you?”

“Eehm, Whit obviously because Ash tells her everything but except her, no one that I know of and I don’t think Ash would tell anyone without mentioning it to me,” she says. “But I don’t know.”

“To be honest, I think a few of the girl suspect that the two of you are more than friend, especially after Ash dropping everything to be with you after your injury. Alex asked me about it, I didn’t say a word of course, but just a heads up you know,” Heather offers and Ali’s eyes go wide.

“Oh God…” she says with panic in her voice.

“Ali, don’t worry about it, they don’t know for sure and even if they did, it wouldn’t change a thing. They all love the both of you and the only thing they want is for you to be happy. And everyone can see how happy Ash makes you, whether it’s as a friend or more. I’m not saying that you have to tell them, I just want you to know that no one would care if you did.”

“It’s just that I…I have let my insecurities ruin this once before and I don’t know if I…I don’t know if I’m ready to let everyone know. It’s just not telling them about Ash; it’s the whole coming out thing. I’m not sure what to tell them,” Ali says with a sigh.

“Wait a minute…you mean it’s not telling them you love Ashlyn that is the problem, but telling them you’re gay?” Heather’s laughing as she looks at Ali in disbelief.

Ali’s not laughing at this, instead she stares at her friend. “It’s not funny, and that’s exactly the problem, I don’t know if I’m gay, or bisexual, or what I am. To be honest, I actually think that I’m just madly in love with Ashlyn because, well, she’s Ashlyn. And I don’t know how to explain that. Ash, Pinoe, and Abby, they are so sure of themselves, they know who they are and they are proud. What do I say when they ask? I’m not ready to label myself…”

“Al,” she says as she wraps her friend in a hug. “They won’t ask because it’s not important and if they, for some wired reason actually would ask, you’ll say just that, you love Ash for who she is and that’s it.”

Ali’s looking at her friend and HAO can see the moment it clicks, her eyes go wide once again before a smile takes over her face. “I need to talk to Ash about this.”

“I think you’re right, talk it through with her and sort everything out, because even though she’s the most patient person I know, she will eventually reach a point when she’s too proud of being with you to not show you off, and when that time comes, you need to be on the same page,” Heather always knows what the defender needs to hear and instead of answering, Ali gives her a bone crushing hug and they stay like that for a moment before letting go, both women with tears in their eyes.

“God HAO, what would I do without you?” she eventually says.

“Don’t worry Al, you’ll never need to find that out. Right side, strong side,” HAO answers with a grin. “I’m just glad I can help you out.”

 

They are at camp with the national team when they get the news. The WPS had officially folded and Ashlyn, along with many other players, are all of a sudden unemployed and has nowhere to play. They had all known it might happen since the season had been canceled but with the last year’s World Cup, they had hoped it would give Women’s Soccer the positive boost it needed. Unfortunately, that was not the case; the era of professional soccer in the U.S. was now over. However, Ashlyn was not one to sit around and wait; instead she immediately called her agent who started to dig into possible options, all around the world.

When she’s lying in her room, recovering from an extra training session with the goal keepers, she receives a text from Ali.

 **Ali:** You okay? HAO just told me the news.

 **Ash:** Yeah I’m fine, it’s not like it’s a big surprise.

 **Ali:** Are you back at the hotel?

 **Ash:** Yep, in my room.

 **Ali:** I’ll be there in a bit.

Ali’s staying with the team during camp even though she’s not officially a part of the team at the moment. She’s doing her rehab with the trainers, she’s working on strength and conditioning, and she’s even working on technical things with the ball. She’s allowed to do almost everything except contact and she loves every moment on the field. She’s also thrilled to finally be around the team again. Just their presence pushes her to work harder and the joy of being a part of something again makes her motivation and intensity to go through the roof.

10 minutes after the last text, Ali’s knocking on the door to room 408 and it only takes a few seconds for Ashlyn to open. “Hello there handsome,” Ali says as she gives the blonde a quick kiss before walking past her into the room. “How are you doing?”

“Well, I don’t have a job anymore, which kind of suck…but other than that I’m doing just fine now when you are here,” Ashlyn answers with a grin as she grabs Ali around the waist and forces her down on the bed. Within seconds, she hovers over her and starts to trail kisses along the brunette’s jaw line before moving over to give her neck the same treatment. When she reaches her pulse point, Ali can’t hold back a loud moan.

“God A-Ash, I came here to…to t-talk to y…” she tries to form a sentence but when the blonde hits a spot right above her collarbone, it disappears into another moan. “Fuck Ash…”

“I thought you never ask,” Ashlyn says with a smirk as she moves her hands down Ali’s body until she reaches the hem of her tank-top and lets her hands slips under it.

“How…l-long do we have?” Ali asks when she realizes she’ll never have the strength to back out of this now. She’s way too turned on and wants Ashlyn desperately.

“I don’t know, Tobs left with Alex right before you texted me. Said something about ice cream,” Ashlyn has now pulled back a bit, hands still underneath Ali’s top. “I can text her.”

“And say what exactly?” Ali’s eyes goes wide when the blonde’s hands ghosts over her bra.

“That I want the room for a bit,” the blonde states, as a matter of fact. “And if she asks why, I’ll just say I explain later,” Ashlyn mumbles as she continues to move her hands, now pulling the top over Ali’s head.

“Do it,” is all Ali can manage to say as Ashlyn’s fingers now has find their way to the hem of her shorts, playfully toying with the waistband. Within a heartbeat, the blonde has rolled off of her, found her phone and typed out a quick text to Tobin, asking her for the room for an hour. A few seconds later, she gets a positive answer not including any questions and without a word, she’s back on top of Ali and continues where she let of.

 

45 minutes later, they are lying next to each other, Ashlyn on her back with Ali’s head resting on her chest. Both of them slightly breath less and sweaty. “We should probably get dressed soon, Tobs can show up any minute now,” Ashlyn says as she hugs Ali tightly. “Thanks for coming over…even though your intentions were to talk,” she continues with a grin and is rewarded with a light slap over her bicep by Ali.

“Yes that was actually my intentions but I’m definitely not complaining about how this turned out,” the brunette answers with a matching grin. “This was exactly was I needed after a draining week of rehab and practice. But, back to why I actually came, how are you doing? Have you heard anything from anyone?”

“I’m doing just fine and as I said before, it’s not like we didn’t suspect this to be the outcome, even though it really sucks. And yes, I called my agent before and he is looking into my options. Depending whether or not I’m going to London, I might have a new club within the next month or so, hopefully at least,” Ashlyn says with a shrug, she won’t tell Ali that she actually have a plan that she already has shared with her agent.

“That’s great Ash,” Ali says with a proud look on her face. “I’m so glad you’re taking this in such a good way. I would be devastated.”

“Well, there’s no reason to be sad or angry when you can’t control the situation, right?” the blonde says as she starts to get up.

“Wait, there is one more thing I need to talk to you about,” Ali says when she all of a sudden remember the talk she had with HAO the first night. “Have you told anyone else than Whit about this,” she points between them to explain what she means. “Anyone on the team I mean.”

Ashlyn looks at her, slightly confused. “No of course not, why would you think that? I promised you we would take it slow and that you would decide how you want to do this,” she says and Ali can both see and hear that she misunderstood the question and thought the brunette accused her for telling someone, hurt evident in both her eyes and voice.

“No Ash, that’s not what I meant, I don’t think you have told anyone. I just ask IF you have, because I know you are close to both Tobin and Alex and if you had talked to any of them, I would be totally fine with it. I just want to know who knows about us,” she explains in an attempt to calm the blonde.

“Oh okay. But no, as I said, I would never talk to anyone about it without checking with you first.”

“That means a lot Ash,” Ali says with a loving smile. “But I think I might be ready to let some of them know soon. I had a talk with HAO the other day and she really helped me to sort out a lot of the confusing feelings I’ve had.”

Once again, Ashlyn gives her a confused look but this time she’s not given any time to ask what Ali means before the brunette continues. “I’ve been thinking a lot about this whole coming out thing and that is kind of the part that scares me the most, not telling people that I’m in love with you. That is not a bit confusing and I couldn’t be more proud of calling someone mine than I am with you but I have just had a hard time figuring out what to tell people about myself. This whole label thing is not really my thing and HAO just helped me to realize what I’m actually feeling.”

“And what is that?” Ashlyn asks carefully.

“I can’t say I’m gay because I think I still could be attracted to men, and I can’t say I’m bisexual because I honestly don’t think I could ever fall in love with a woman that is not you. I realized that I simply love you, and not because you’re a woman, but because you are you. I’m madly in love with your soul and personality and that’s it,” Ali states with a nervous laugh, not really sure how Ash would react to this but to her surprise, the blonde just gives her a goofy smile.

“I’m so proud of you Alex. I don’t think there is a single thing I want more than for you to be comfortable with yourself. I know the struggle; I know how hard it is to figure these things out, and I know what a relief it is to finally be able to look at yourself in the mirror and truly see you for who you are. For me, it doesn’t matter how you label yourself, the only thing that matters is that you are mine,” Ashlyn says as she leans over to give the brunette a kiss.

“I’m yours, and I’ll be yours for as long as you want me,” Ali says in between kisses.

“Then your mine forever, because a life time is not long enough, I will keep wanting you in an eternity,” for the second time, Ashlyn pulls back and starts to get up. “Time to get dressed princess, we don’t want to give Tobin and Alex a heart attack,” she says as she gives Ali a hand to help her out of the bed and takes to opportunity to pull her close and give her a last kiss.

 

Two days later they have a day off and Pinoe and Syd plan a night out for all the girls, just as usual. In between practices and ice baths, the rare nights when they get the chance to get out of their soccer gear and dress up as normal people, was what kept them sane. They all went to a popular bar a couple of blocks away from the hotel and they all had a blast.

When the clock approached midnight Ashlyn finds Ali by the bar together with Kelley, Syd, and Alex and she can immediately see that the brunette is a bit tipsy, not drunk but definitely affected by the alcohol. If she hadn’t noticed it by the way she was slightly unstable on her heals, she would definitely had realized it when Ali threw her arms around her neck.

“Theeeeeere you areeeee…” she yells over the music. “I’ve been missing you.”

“Al, not here,” Ashlyn says and tries to get her to understand what she means. She knows how touchy the brunette can be with some alcohol in her blood and she also knows that she will regret it in the morning if they do something out in public.

Ali however, doesn’t seem to care, or she might not actually be listening; instead she takes the blonde’s hand and leads her towards the dance floor. “Dance with me,” she simply says before turning around to press her back against Ashlyn’s front and with this, the blonde looses her last string of self-control. There is nothing she finds sexier than Ali’s body pressed against her own, moving to the music, and her hands goes straight to the brunette’s hips.

After dancing a while like that, Ali turns back around and looks her arms around Ashlyn’s neck, now dancing significantly slower. “Alex, you’ve been drinking, don’t do anything you will regret,” Ashlyn warns her.

“Yes I’ve been drinking, but I’m not drunk Ash. I’m well aware of what I’m doing,” the defender answers and Ashlyn can’t argue that because even though Ali was somewhat unstable before, she has been sobering up during the roughly 30 minutes they’ve been on the dance floor.

“And what exactly are you doing?”

“Right now I’m dancing close together with the sexiest woman on this earth, who also happens to be the love of my life, and in the next few seconds, I will kiss the same woman until she’s not remembering her own name,” Ali whispers in the blonde’s ear and before Ashlyn has a chance to react, Ali pulls back slightly before leaning in again, this time in order to crash their lips together.

Even though they shared countless kisses before, this one is different. Time seems to stand still and all Ashlyn can do is to pull the defender closer and deepen the kiss, not caring about where they are or who is watching. She trusts that Ali is aware of what she’s doing, she trust that she’s ready for this, and she trust that it won’t cause trouble or anxiety in the morning. If Ali says she’s sober enough, Ashlyn simply trusts her.

Over at the bar, Syd, Alex, and Kelley are still standing, now watching their two friends lost in each other. “Well, that took them long enough,” Kelley finally says with a chuckle and the others can only agree.

The three friends aren’t the only ones watching their teammates, over at a table on the other side of the dance floor another bunch of players are sitting and watching the pair, most of them not surprised at all. The only one staring in disbelief is Tobin but that has nothing to do with it being Ashlyn and Ali, the tan midfielder is just in general oblivious to what is going on around her.

“What the heck is that?” she finally says which results in laughter among her friends.

“Dude, Harris has been in love with Ali since the first time she laid eyes on her at the airport in LA,” Abby says with a grin. “And to be honest, I think that Ali has been feeling the same as well. You need to step up your game and start to pay attention, aren’t you rooming with Ash?”

“Oh God,” is everything Tobin manage to say.

“What?” Hope usually stays outside of the gossip but this time she’s curious about what is going on inside of Tobin’s head.

“S-She asked about having the room for herself for an hour the other day and when I got back, she and Ali was laying in her bed watching a movie. I do not want to think about what they were doing until 5 minutes before I came back,” she says with a frightened look on her face and the rest of the women can’t resist laughing.

“Wow Tobs, you really are oblivious,” Abby says as she’s shaking her head, still laughing.

On the dance floor, Ashlyn and Ali are still as lost in each other and when they eventually pull apart, it is with red cheeks and swollen lips but Ali has a huge grin on her face. “I love you so much Ash,” she says before leaning in for another kiss, this one not as heated as the first one.

“I love you too princess,” Ashlyn says with a matching grin. “But you are completely sure about this?” she asks carefully, not wanting to ruin the mood.

Ali just laughs. “Well, if I wasn’t it would be a little too late for that right now, don’t you think?”

“Yeah but I just want to make sure, there will be questions you know,” the blonde chuckles as she removes a strain of hair from Ali’s face. They are still in the middle of the dance floor and have to almost yell to hear each other over the music.

“Ash,” Ali says as she takes the blonde’s face in her hands. “I. Am. Sure. Now take me back to the hotel,” she continues with a smirk before taking Ashlyn’s hand in her own, dragging her towards the doors without caring about saying goodbye to their friends.

Ashlyn on the other hand waves awkwardly towards the table where Abby, Tobin and the rest of the girls are sitting and watching them. She’s rewarded with whistles but the only thing she can do is smile shyly towards them with a shrug as they have almost made their way outside already.

When they start walking towards the hotel, Ashlyn’s phone buzzes in her pocket, notifying her she has an incoming text.

 **Tobs:** Not coming back to our room tonight, staying with HAO. Take it easy champ, and I can’t believe you haven’t told me. What a friend…

Ashlyn chuckles as she’s showing Ali the text. “Seems like we have the room to ourselves tonight,” she says with a smirk.

Ali’s cheek goes red but she can’t resist a chuckle slipping from her lips either. “Yeah I guess, but I don’t want to know what they are saying about us right now,” she says as she hides her face in her hands, still smiling.

“It doesn’t matter, let them talk. They will not go easy on us tomorrow but I know they are happy for us,” the blonde assures her as they are walking hand in hand. “Now, let’s get back so we can take advantage of the room as long as possible,” she continues with a smirk and a raised eye brow as she leans in and places a kiss on the shorter woman’s temple as they keep walking.

 

When they wake up the next day, they are snuggled close together and Ali lets out a deep, but happy, sigh. “Can we stay here the whole day? I don’t want to meet the others,” she says with a chuckle. “Don’t think I can look them in the eyes today.”

“Oh no princess, you’re the one who couldn’t resist me yesterday so you’re not getting out of this,” Ashlyn teases. “I asked you if you were sure and you said yes,” she continues a bit more serious.

“Yeah I know, and I meant it. I don’t regret it a bit but that doesn’t mean I want to face them and their teasing,” the brunette replies.

“Sorry to break it to you, but you doesn’t really have a choice,” Ashlyn says as she kisses Ali on the cheek. “It’s time to get up, I’m starving. And for the record, it’s better to get it over with instead of pushing it,” she continues with a smile. “I’ll be there and protect you all the way through it.”

When they get down to the breakfast, most of the team is sitting there, greeting them with whistles and laughter. Ali stops and hides her face in Ashlyn’s chest and the keeper rolls her eyes toward their friends.

“Come on, be nice guys. Princess here are a bit shy,” she says with a grin and Ali rewards her with a slap on the arm.

“I’m NOT shy,” she says before releasing her grip around Ashlyn and walk towards the food without looking at their teammates who continues to laugh.

When they sit down a moment later, Ali scoots closer to Ashlyn who drapes an arm around the defenders shoulder, both of them happy that they finally are able to show affection for each other around their friends.

Everyone is looking at each other, not wanting to be the one who asks the question they all are dying to hear the answer to. Syd is eventually the one breaking the silence. “Sooo guys, I guess the two of you have some explaining to do…” she says and the rest of them nod towards the couple.

“Yeah about that…” Ashlyn says to buy them some time and to tease their friends.

“Oh no, we won’t let you off the hook that easy,” Kelley is now the one talking. “Spill,” she says as she’s leaning back in her chair, arms crossed over her chest and a smug smile all over her face.

With a sigh, Ali looks at Ashlyn before she takes a deep breath and start to tell the “story” for their friends. Ashlyn let her take the lead but adds things here and there where she finds it suitable. They give them the basics of what has happened during the past years and a half without saying too much, some of the details and events are something their friends don’t have to know about. Ali’s thankful when the blonde addresses their breakup by stating that things got hard after the World Cup and that they wasn’t on the same page at the time.

When they are finished, most of their friends are stunned. “Wow, I’ve had my suspicions when it comes to the two of you but this…just wow,” Alex says as she’s looking between the pair. “I would never have guessed you could keep it a secret for that long but I’m so happy for you,” she continues and the rest of the girls agree.

Ali looks at Ashlyn, relived that everything is finally out there and she couldn’t be happier. She has the love of her life at her side and they are surrounded by the best friends possible.

When camp is over a week later, Ali has done everything in her power to get back, to be good enough to be a part of the team going to London. The last knee test will tell her, the training staff, and of course Pia if she will be hundred percent healthy in time. Unfortunately, the test shows her knee to be back at 60-70 percent, a bit lower than she had hoped for and even though she has six more weeks to work on strength and conditioning, she can feel that their head coach won’t take the risk and put her on the roster. She is bummed and disappointed at herself even though she knows she has done exactly everything she possibly could during the past four months.

They leave camp together to go back to New York, knowing that an email with the roster will be sent to them during the evening. They would both lie if they said they weren’t nervous. Ali has more or less given up after the knee test but there is still a small chance that Pia will believe in her and give her a spot on the roster. Ashlyn on the other hand, she knows she’s been doing really well on the camps during the winter and spring, but she also knows that the competition is tough and she has been disappointed too many times before to actually dare to believe that this time will be any different. Still, both of them are hoping, with every fiber in their bodies, that their name will be on the roster. And just as much as they hope it for themselves, they are hoping to see the others name on the list as well.

After a much-needed date night, where Ashlyn made her famous Mac ‘n’ Cheese, Ali is eager to check her phone. They made a rule when Ashlyn visited Ali after her injury saying no phones at dinner and even though the brunette had tried to make an exception this night, Ashlyn had not given in. In fact, she argued it was even more important tonight than ever to keep the phones away. The email would be there later on as well, but they hadn’t really spent any time alone during the camp so tonight would be there night.

“I don’t think I can do it,” Ali says after picking up her phone from her purse. “I’m nervous.”

“Let’s open it together. And remember, whatever it says, we are here for each other,” Ashlyn is just as nervous herself but tries to soother Ali in an attempt to take her mind off of her own nerves. “This roster will not change a thing between us.”

“You’re right, let’s do it,” the brunette says as she opens the email.

A few seconds of complete silence follows while they scroll through the email. Eventually they look at each other, the disappointment obvious in their eyes; both of their names are missing on the roster and Ashlyn is the one who finally breaks the silence.

“Well, fuck this…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really wanted to include the HAO/Ali moment because I’m still bummed Jill left her out of the qualifying roster (I hope you like that scene, I really enjoyed writing it) and that lead to me wanting to include the night at the bar and them “coming out” to the team AND the next day, so yeah when I thought I was done I added another 3000 words…however, I hope you all like it. I don’t know why but this is probably my favorite chapter this far. 
> 
> When you keep the love coming, I’ll keep the chapters coming ;)


	12. Welcome to Frankfurt

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Surprises...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back...at least with one chapter. With finals coming up, my life is a mess at the moment but I really wanted to get this out for you guys. Hopefully you will enjoy it and I will do my best to get another one done within the nearest future. Thank you for sticking with me!!

A few days after camp ended, both Ashlyn and Ali are still incredibly disappointed. They had both been fighting so hard and given everything in order to make the roster and when they didn’t, everything they had done up to this point lost it purpose and none of them knew what the next step would be now when they weren’t going to London. They spend a few days together, not doing anything and absolutely not talking about anything soccer related or the future. It was a well needed break from everything after spending such a long time focused on a specific goal.

Eventually, reality caught up with them and they couldn’t ignore the future any longer which forced them to make some tough decisions. Ashlyn, who has been bothered by her right shoulder, schedules a surgery and Ali is flying back to Germany to continue to work toward a comeback and just like that, the couple is separated by the ocean once again. It kills Ali that she can’t be there for Ashlyn’s surgery but the blonde reassures her that she will be just fine; Ali has more important things to take care of.

“Babe, it’s totally fine and you know it. You also know that you didn’t have a choice. When Frankfurt says they want you there, you have to be there. It is what is best for your training,” Ashlyn says when they are talking over Facetime the day before her surgery. “And besides, what would you have done here anyway?”

“I would have been there when you woke up, just as you were for me,” the brunette says with a pout, not at all happy with the situation. “But you are right, as always,” she sighs and rolls her eyes when she can see a smirk on the blonde’s face.

“I know, I’m always right,” she replies cocky but adds a wink to let Ali know she’s joking.

“Whatever,” she brunette mutters before she sighs again. “Can you promise me to text me as soon as you can tomorrow? It doesn’t matter what time it is, just text me and let me know you’re out of surgery and awake, please.”

“Yeah of course, if I make it of the table,” Ashlyn jokes.

“Ashlyn Michelle Harris,” if looks could kill, the blonde would never even make it into the table in the first place. “That’s not funny, stop acting like a kid,” Ali continues, letting Ashlyn know she did not appreciate the joke.

“Jeez Al, relax. I’m just kidding. I highly doubt a shoulder surgery will kill me,” she plays it off with a shrug and a grin but can see Ali is really pissed.

“Whatever,” the brunette mumbles for the second time within a minute. “I really have to go now; I’ll talk to you tomorrow. Love you.”

“I love you too Alex, sleep tight.”

 

The surgery goes according to plan and the blonde can start her rehab quickly to get back out on the field. When it comes to her future club address, her agent has been working hard during the last couple of weeks and the plan they had been working on together since the news of the folding league came, was almost settled now which made it time for her to let Ali know about it.

“Hi beautiful,” she says when the brunette’s face shows up on her computer screen. “How was practice?”

“Good, I’m feeling strong and hopefully I’ll be cleared for playing pretty soon,” she says with a huge grin.

“That’s amazing Alex,” the blonde says just as excited. “I’m so proud of you.”

“Let’s wait with the celebration until it actually happens,” Ali laughs but can’t deny the warm feeling she gets when she sees how genuinely happy Ashlyn is for her. “How’s the rehab going?”

“It sucks, to be honest,” Ashlyn says with a shrug. “But I’m hanging in there, it should not take too long until I’m fit for fight again,” she continues, knowing there is no point of hiding the truth for Ali, she can read her like an open book. “By the way, how would you feel about me coming to Germany for a few days in the end of next week?” she then says casually.

Ali, who’s focused on what the blonde said about her shoulder, does not pick up on the question right away but after a few seconds, her face is covered in confusion. “What?” she asks and when the pieces falls together, her eyes goes wide. “Why would you do that, it’s just a bit over two weeks since I left.”

“Yeah I know, but I really miss you…and there is also this club, Duisburg I think it’s called, and they kind of wants to sign me…” she says it just as casual, and adds a shrug on the end to play it off.

Once again, Ali does not pick up on what she’s saying immediately. “Aaw babe, I really miss you too, but I’ll be ho…” she leaves the sentence hanging when she realizes what the blonde just said. “WHAAAAT??!” she all but yells and Ashlyn is fighting to keep a straight face.

“Yeah they apparently need a goalkeeper and I’ve heard that Germany is a pretty cool place so I thought why not,” she replies with another shrug. “And I guess it doesn’t hurt that the sexiest woman I know lives only two hours away from Duisburg.” She loses the battle and a huge grin makes it way over her face, a grin that very much matches the one on a certain defender.

“Oh. My. God. Ashlyn please don’t joke with me. If this is one of your sick jokes, I promise you I will kill you,” Ali says and she gives the blonde a somewhat serious look.

“Alex, do you really think I would joke about something like this?” she says but it’s a rhetorical question and she doesn’t wait for Ali to say something before she continues. “I’m very much serious, my flight ticket is reserved and as long as I pass the health exam, I’ll be a Duisburg player by the end of the week.”

Tears are steaming down Ali’s face and she covers her mouth with her hand, still not completely reassured that the blonde is not messing with her. “How did this happen?” she finally asks.

“Well…I might have mentioned for Dave that I wouldn’t complain if he found me a club in Germany, and that was the same day as the WPS folded so I’ve been hoping on something like this the whole time but it’s not until this past couple of days that things really has been moving forward. And before you say anything, I didn’t want to mention it in case it wouldn’t happen, you know,” Ashlyn admits shyly, as she don’t want to seem too eager. Even though she knew it was ridiculous, she could not keep herself from thinking it might be a stupid idea. What if Ali didn’t want her coming to Germany? What if she was perfectly happy with the way things were at the moment? She had her own life in Frankfurt, a life that did not really include Ashlyn.

“Oh. My. God,” Ali says again with the biggest smile on her face and the blonde immediately feels better, of course Ali wouldn’t mind her coming to Germany. “This is just…I don’t even know what to say…you are just…” she leaves the sentence hanging as her smile disappears and she becomes serious. “You are the most amazing human being on earth Ash, but I have to ask you this, are you completely sure that this is what you want, moving here to play I mean? Not that I don’t want you to, because believe me when I say there is nothing I want more than that, but you have to come here for the right reason,” she says carefully, not wanting to upset the blonde who apparently has been working hard to make this happen.

Ashlyn sighs, knowing why Ali’s asking, and she’s anything but angry. “Trust me Al, I’ve been thinking about this back and forth more than what is healthy, and I would lie if I said it has nothing to do with you. If there was a league at home, I would play here, but there isn’t so my only option is Europe and why would I choose a club in Sweden, France or England when I can choose Germany and be closer to you? No matter what club I’m playing for, I will be able to do what I love so the place doesn’t really matter to me since I have to move anyway. Does that make sense?” she explains, hoping Ali will understand how she’s thinking. “No country, or city, in Europe will be the same as here. But it doesn’t matter either because you are my home Alex and I will be okay where ever I am as long as I have you,” she continues with a shy smile, well aware of how corny she sounds but doesn’t even care, it’s the truth.

The smile is back on Ali’s face, and she tilts her head slightly to the right as she takes a deep breath. “I have no idea what I did to deserve you, but I want you to know that I feel the exact same way, and it makes perfect sense. If this is what you want, I couldn’t be happier,” she states and wipes a few tears away.

The blonde has to fight to keep her own tears away. She’s been working on this for weeks without telling Ali and now when it’s all out there, she can’t wait to be on the plane across the Atlantic Ocean. “I love you so much Alex, and it doesn’t matter that you left only two weeks ago, I miss you more than anything.”

“I miss and love you too, and I can’t believe this is really happening. And I can definitely not believe you kept it a secret for me,” she says with an adorable pout. “You can never keep a secret from me.”

The blonde just laughs, not knowing where Ali got the last statement from. “Babe, you are the one that always gets too excited to keep anything from me, I on the other hand, am the master of secrets,” she says cockily with a smirk, knowing that the Duisburg news isn’t the only plan she has been working on.

“Yeah yeah, whatever you say stud,” Ali replies and rolls her eyes, well aware of the fact that Ashlyn is right. “When will you be here?” she then asks when she’s realizing she’s not really knowing anything about the blonde’s visit yet.

“I’m flying out on Wednesday evening and will land in Frankfurt Thursday morning if everything goes according to plan,” she says. “And my meeting with Duisburg is on Friday, so I hope it is okay that I stay with you, I haven’t really booked a hotel,” she adds with a grin.

“Of course it is, silly,” Ali says while laughing before she once again turns serious. “I can’t wait for Thursday,” she sighs happily before yawning. “But I really need to go to bed now; I have a conditioning session tomorrow morning.”

Ashlyn glances at her watch, realizing how late it is in Germany. “Shit, I’m sorry babe, go to bed and sleep tight, we’ll talk more tomorrow.”

“I will, soon we’ll be going to bed together,” she says with a nose crinkling grin. “Three days.”

“Three days,” Ashlyn repeats with a huge grin on her own. “I love you princess,” she says before they say their final goodbyes.  

 

When Ali is done with her individual practice Wednesday afternoon, two of her teammates, Sandra Smisek and Nadine Angerer, are waiting on her next to her car.

“What are you doing here?” she asks them, desperately trying to figure out if she has forgotten about some sort of plans with the two women.

“Waiting for you, obviously,” Sandra answers with a grin as she hands Ali a bag. “We are here to pick up your practice stuff and give you this,” she says with a nod towards the bag still in her hand.

“What?” Ali says, looking between them for some sort of clue about what is going on.

“Just take the bag, and read this note,” Nadine says and simply takes the bag stuffed with sweaty clothes Ali has over her right shoulder as she gives her an envelope. Before the brunette has a chance to ask any more questions, Sandra has dropped the other bag on the ground and they have both jumped into Nadine’s black BMW, which was parked next to Ali’s white.

She’s watching her friends disappear in the Frankfurt traffic before she slowly opens the plain envelope, finding a note with an address on. She frowns as she squats down to check what’s in the bag, only to find one of her black dresses, a pair of heals, lingerie and makeup. Realizing her friends has been to her apartment to pick it up while she was at practice. She takes one more look at the note, on both sides without finding anything more than the address, which she knows are located on the other side of the city.

Eventually, she grabs the bag and throws it into the passenger seat before placing herself behind the steering wheel and enters the address into her phone. She becomes even more confused when she sees exactly where it leads her, a five stars Hilton hotel. After debating with herself for a few minutes, she shrugs and starts the car. “Let’s see what crazy shit they have come up with this time,” she says to herself, thinking it has to be Sandra and Nadine’s work.

When she, almost an hour later thanks to the horrible traffic, walks through the hotels doors she’s looking around in an attempt to find some sort of clue to why she’s there. Within seconds a young man, with a name tag on his chest that gives away he’s working at the hotel, comes up to her. “Miss Krieger?” he asks.

“Yes?” she answers carefully, surprised that he knows who she is.

His eyes lit up and he gives her a big smile. “Perfect, then I can take your bag and you can come with me,” he says as reaches for her bag before starting to walk off.

After a moment of hesitation, Ali follows him as he guides her through the hotel until they reach the elevator and she freezes. “Eehm, which floor are we going to?” she asks hesitantly.

“The 12th ma’am, is there a problem?” he asks her when he sees the look on her face.

She immediately realizes that her plan, involving her taking the stairs, flew out through the window and takes a deep breath before giving the young man a smile. “No, not at all,” she answers before stepping into the elevator before him.

The ride goes by quickly but she can’t wait to get out as soon as they stop which make her rush out as soon as the doors are open enough. When the man gives her a curious look, she chuckles and shrugs. “Sorry, I’m not really good with elevators, or any other tight spaces for that matter,” she explains and he nods and gives her a small smile before they start walking again, only to stop a few seconds later in front of a huge double door, leading into what Ali assumes is one of the hotels suites. The man slides a key and holds the door for her. “Welcome to Hilton Miss Krieger. If there is anything you want, don’t hesitate to call, and I hope you will enjoy your stay,” he says as he gives her the room key and closes the door behind him before she finds the ability to speak. She slowly walks into the hotel room, her jaw hanging, trying to take in what she’s seeing. As a professional soccer player, she’s been staying at hotels all over the world but up till now, she has never seen anything as beautiful as this.

“Wow…” she says under her breath before she realizes that she has no idea what she’s doing there. After taking a look at the bedroom, where she finds the biggest and most comfortable bed she ever seen in her life (yes, she might have thrown herself at it just to see if it felt as good as it looks), she walks back out and finds another envelope, just as the one Nadine gave her.

_Everything you need for tonight is in the bag. Be ready at 7 pm._

She glances at her clock and sees it’s almost 6, and being well aware of how long time she can take getting ready, she takes the bag with her back to the bedroom and starts to unpack it. Still not knowing what is going on. If she didn’t knew better, she would think this was Ashlyn’s work but since she’s not flying in until the next day, she figures it has to be the girls who are up to something.

Even though she showered after practice, she figures it’s probably for the best to do it again. She wants to feel fresh for whatever she’s going to do tonight. 45 minutes later she emerges from the bedroom, showered, dressed, and with her makeup on point, and finds a bottle of wine and a glass on the table, along with another envelope. Someone from the staff must have left it there while she was in the shower.

She reads the note and smiles as she opens the bottle, pouring up half a glass for herself. The note is short but clear.

_Enjoy!_

She takes the glass and walks over to the balcony, slowly pushing the door open before she walks out in the warm June evening. With a happy sigh she’s watching the beautiful view in front on her. From where she’s standing, she can see the whole city, a city she absolutely loves and a city she calls home. She stays there, taking in the moment, until her clock shows 7 pm and she makes her way back into the room, leaving the now empty glass next to the bottle. With a final look in the mirror, she picks up her purse and waits for whatever is going to happen. 5 minutes past 7 she hears a knock on the door and walks over to answer it.

“Oh God,” she says when she sees Ashlyn standing in the hallway, dressed in black suit pants, a white button up, and a red bowtie with a single red rose in her hand. “I should have known it was you,” she continues as she closes the distance between them, throwing her arms around the blonde’s neck and holds her tightly.

“Hi princess,” Ashlyn mumbles into the brunettes hair as they are hugging each other. “I’ve missed you so much,” she says when they finally breaks apart, only to lean in again but this time to crash their lips together in a passionate kiss.

“I’ve missed you too,” Ali eventually says and looks at the blonde with tears in her eyes. “So much.”

Ashlyn gives her a smile and a light kiss on her forehead before taking her hand. “Are you ready to leave?” she asks.

“Yes, just let me grab my purse and leave the rose inside, then we can go,” Ali answers as she turns around to get her belongings before joining Ashlyn again. She closes the door behind her and they start walking next to each other to the elevators. “So much for not booking a hotel room, huh? she says teasingly as she nudges the blonde with her elbow in an attempt to take her mind of the small space she’s about to enter. “ And you had to book one at the 12th floor?” she continues.

“Sorry for that, they didn’t have any suites on the first floor,” Ashlyn answers as they make their way inside. “But I think I can make you forget where you are,” she continues with a devilish grin and before Ali has a chance to react, she’s pushed against the wall with the blonde’s lips against her own. And of course Ashlyn was right; within a heartbeat she has forgotten everything about elevators or tight spaces.

 

The two women have an amazing evening together. Ashlyn has made a reservation on one of the best restaurants in the area and they are enjoying their time together, catching up on things they haven’t had time to talk about over Skype, as well as Ashlyn’s upcoming meeting with Duisburg. After a delicious dinner, desert, and bottle of wine, they are both ready to head back to the hotel, the blonde exhausted thanks to a long travel day and the time difference.

“I can’t believe how you always manage to surprise me,” Ali says as they are walking through the hallway leading up to their room.

Ashlyn just smirks, placing her hand on the small of Ali’s back as she slides the key to open the door. “Only the best for you,” she says as they walk inside.

“You have to be exhausted,” Ali says as the door closes behind them.

“Yeah I am,” the blonde answers as she walks up to Ali who’s now standing with her back against her, fiddling with her earrings. “But not too tired,” she continues as she slides her arms around the smaller woman’s waist and kisses her neck slowly. “I’m planning on staying up for at least another couple of hours.”

When the blonde’s lips finds Ali’s pulse point, a soft moan escapes her lips and she tilts her head to give Ashlyn more access. “God I’ve missed this,” she whispers as she turns around to crash their lips together. Before the blonde can react, Ali has her pined against the wall and her fingers are slowly working on the buttons on her shirt.

“Ali…” the blonde starts but she’s cut off by another kiss.

“Sssh, let me,” Ali says as she finishes the last button and slides the shirt off of the blonde’s shoulder onto the floor while looking at her with a fire in her eyes. Their lips find each other once again and Ali runs her tongue across the keeper’s lower lip demanding for entrance, which Ashlyn is not late to obey. They make out for several minutes before Ali kisses her way along the blonde’s jaw line, over to her neck where she carefully sucks on the point right below the ear.

Ashlyn is thinking about objecting again, tonight would be all about Ali, but when her lips leaves her neck and travels down her body, over the thin fabric of her sports bra down to her defined abs, that thought is long gone.

In one swift movement, Ali takes the bra of and drops it to the floor, wasting no time when finding the blonde’s left nipple with her mouth. She’s rewarded with a moan and spends a few moments taking care of both breasts before continuing down towards the waistband of Ashlyn’s pants. On her way down she moves to the side, tracing the colorful tattoo on the blonde’s rib cage with her tongue.

“God Al, you’re going to be my death,” Ashlyn manage to get out before the brunette kisses her way back to the front, teasing her with her tongue right under the waistband and another moan escapes from the blonde.

Ali giggles as she starts to work on the belt and button in Ashlyn’s pants and within seconds they suffer a similar fate as the rest of the blonde’s clothes, falling slowly to the ground. Ashlyn steps out of them and unconsciously spreads her leg a bit farther apart to give Ali access to where she needs her the most.

“You are so beautiful Ash,” the smaller woman says as her hands are roaming over the keepers strong legs and she begins to kiss her inner tight slowly.

Ashlyn blushes slightly, Ali has had that effect on her since day one, and she will never get used to hearing her compliments. “Please…” she eventually says when she doesn’t think she can take the teasing anymore. “I need you Alex,” she continues, knowing how much it turns the brunette on hearing her beg and just as she thought, it doesn’t take many seconds for Ali to grip the hem of her boxer briefs and pull them down until they are on the floor along with her pants. She steps out of them as well and gives the woman in front of her a pleading look.

The brunette is well aware of how much Ashlyn wants her to stop the teasing but she’s not done just yet. With a movement painfully slow, she traces the blonde’s right leg with her tongue until she reaches her hip bone, where she stops momentarily and sucks lightly, before doing the same thing with the left leg.

“I swear to God Ali, if you don’t fuck me right now, I will not survive this,” Ashlyn eventually says, trying a different approach because just as much as Ali loves hearing her begging, she loves dirty talk. Their eyes are locked together and the smirk on Ali’s lips drives Ashlyn absolutely crazy and she loses it, this time she’s all but begging. “Fuck. Me. Now,” she says between gritted teeth as she’s grabbing the back of Ali’s head to guide her where she wants her.

Without as much as a word, Ali’s hands find her legs, spreading them farther apart before she looks up one final time, catching Ashlyn’s dark eyes and sees pure pleasure in them.

With her head still in a firm grip, Ashlyn once again pushes Ali’s head towards her center and finally, she can feel Ali’s tongue running through her soaking folds, licking up all her wetness. She’s bucking her hips against the brunette’s mouth and moans out loud as she continues to eat her out.

There is no sexier sight in this world than watching Ali’s head bobbing between her legs and the blonde has to force her eyes to stay open, her breath now heavy and legs somewhat unstable. “Aaarghh, fuck,” she moans as both her hand goes up to her face, covering now closed eyes in pleasure as Ali’s tongue is fucking her.

Ali smiles but continues her work, now leaving the keepers entrance and moving to her clit, stroking it softly before taking it into her mouth and sucking on it eagerly. With this, Ashlyn’s eyes shots open and her hands finds their way back to Ali’s head, mostly to hold onto something since her legs are giving up on her and thankfully, the brunette places one of her hands on Ashlyn’s hip in order to keep her standing.

“I…I’m going to…I’m…FUUUUUCK,” Ashlyn yells as she falls over the edge, her orgasm ripping her body into a million pieces. Ali continues to suck on her clit through her bliss and when she finally comes down from her height, Ali kisses her way back up over her body until she reaches her lips and gives her a deep kiss, allowing her to taste herself. With her hand still on her hips, Ali keeps her steady as their tongues slowly dance together. Eventually, the blonde can feel Ali smile against her lips and they break apart.

“Welcome to Frankfurt babe,” she says with a grin as she pecks Ashlyn on the lips once more. “Do you think you can make it to the bedroom now,” she continues as she let go of her hips, making sure she’s steady enough on her own.

Ashlyn rests her head against the wall behind her, eyes closed and a satisfied smile on her face. “Yeah, just give me one more second and I’ll be as good as new,” she says as she takes a deep breath and opens her eyes slowly, meeting Ali’s. They watch each other for a heart beat until Ashlyn’s hand finds the brunette’s waist, pulling her closer and leaning in for another kiss. A few seconds later, she breaks it, takes Ali’s hand in her own and starts to walk towards the bedroom. “Come on princess, now it’s my turn to show you how much I love finally being here,” she says with a wink as they make their way onto the king size bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Who's still with me on this one?


	13. I Can't Wait

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter for you guys! With finals coming up next week, I've been occupied with school for the last couple of weeks but today, I couldn't take reading another sentence about management so I took a break and put this together instead. In a week I will have my life back and hopefully, there will be more frequent updates then. Love you all for your amazing comments, that's what keeps me motivated.

“Do you have everything you need? Your phone, the papers, your ticket, snacks?” Ali rambles as she watches Ashlyn tie her shoes.

“Jeeez Alex, are you my mom or my girlfriend?” the blonde answers, but with a wink to show she’s just joking. “Yes I have everything, you don’t need to worry. I’ll be fine,” she continues before she takes a step forward to bring Ali in for a hug. “I’ll let you know how it goes during the day and then I’ll be back before you know it.”

“Okay great, I count on multiple updates, just so you know,” Ali says with a grin. “I’ll turn into the clingy girlfriend.”

The blonde just rolls her eyes and after a quick peck on Ali’s lips, she’s ready to leave and starts to turn towards the door.

“Are you serious now Ash?” the brunette’s says out of nowhere, looking at her in disbelief.

“What?” Ashlyn asks confused.

“I can’t believe that you’re even considering leaving me here and going to this super important meeting, with a kiss as lame as that one?” her widen eyes shows Ashlyn that she’s not joking, she’s deadly serious.

Ashlyn can’t keep herself from laughing, even though she’s well aware of the fact that it might just piss the brunette off even more. “I’m sorry babe, I really am,” she says between laughter. “Come here Alex,” she continues as she pulls the defender in by her waist and, in a true romantic movie spirit, bends Ali’s upper body backwards before she crashes their lips together. When she lets go and helps Ali back up, after what feels like an entirety, she smile sheepishly. “Is the princess happy and satisfied now?” she teases.

Ali just pouts. But it’s a pout that quickly changes into a warm smile as she watches the blonde grin at her. “You are the biggest dork I’ve ever met in my entire life, but I love you so much,” she says and gives Ashlyn a final hug before pushing her towards the door. “Now go, make me proud, and bring that contract home.”

 

3 hours after Ashlyn left the apartment, Ali receives a not so positive text.

**Ash:** I think I’m lost

**Ali:** What?

**Ash:** yeah no idea where I am, has to get a hold of someone from the club hahah

**Ali:** This is not funny, are you seriously lost?

This time, Ashlyn doesn’t respond immediately and the brunette freaks out slightly. “I knew I shouldn’t have let her go alone,” she mumbles to herself while trying to take her mind off of her girlfriend and being productive instead. She doesn’t have practice for another 3 hours but her wardrobe needs a clean up so until she hears anything, she starts going through her cloths. Twenty minutes passes until Ashlyn finally texts her again.

**Ash:** not any more, I figured it out and will be picked up in a couple of minutes. Everything is fine, love you.

**Ali:** You’re a jerk

**Ash:** what? you told me to keep you posted ;)

**Ali:** Whatever…let me know how it goes later, ok? Be careful around the Germans ;) love u

Ali is not amused over the text conversation; of course the blonde would make a joke out of something as essential as being lost, and possibly running late, for this kind of important meeting.

They continue to text throughout the day but Ashlyn is not giving the brunette any clear answer regarding the outcome of the meeting. _It went fine_ is everything Ali gets out of her when they are on the phone with each other while the blonde is on the train on her way back to Frankfurt and Ali’s on her way home from practice.

“I swear to God Ash, you are impossible,” Ali says, laughing.

“I’m not,” the blonde answers. “I’m telling you it went fine, and then I’ll let you know the rest when I take you out on a date tonight,” she continues casually.

“Oh, is that so?” Ashlyn can hear Ali’s smile through the phone and she knows that she has her exactly where she wants.

“Yes princess, it is,” she’s wearing a matching smile and can’t wait to be back with Ali. She has a lot to tell her and she’s looking forward to another night out with her girl.

“Can’t wait, but I have to go now. See you in a bit,” Ali says as she hits the downtown traffic and has to concentrate on the actual driving part.

 

“Hi babe,” Ashlyn says as she enters the door to Ali’s apartment. Within a heartbeat, the brunette is wrapped around her in a tight hug.

“I can’t describe how much I love hearing you say that while coming though my door,” she says with a huge grin on her face before placing a kiss on the blonde’s lips. “Welcome home,” she continues as she walks away from the smiling keeper.

An hour later, they have both changed and got ready to head out but instead of going to a fancy and expensive restaurant as the other day; they chose the Italian place they ate at when Ashlyn visited Ali in Germany almost a year and a half ago.

During the hour they spent at home, Ali has asked multiple times about the meeting but the answer was the same every time.

“Alex, for the hundredth time, I will tell you everything over dinner. Stop asking,” Ashlyn are getting slightly annoyed, even though she knows she has no right to be. If the roles had been reversed, she had been pissed at Ali for not telling her but she really wants to do it when they are sitting down in peace and quiet.

“Whatever,” the brunette mutters before walking away to finish up her makeup.

“Stop the pouting, you will know soon enough,” Ashlyn says as she follows her to ensure she’s not really angry.

“I know, but I hate to wait and be patient,” Ali whines and the blonde can’t resist laughing.

“Believe me, I’m well aware of that Al,” she says with a wink before she leans in and captures the smaller woman’s lips with her own. “That’s why I’m not telling you,” she continues with a smirk when she’s leaving the bathroom to get herself ready and right before Ali swats her arm.

 

“Soooo,” Ali starts once they are seated and have made their orders. “I’m all ears,” she continues with a grin.

Ashlyn laughs, but knows that now is the time. She didn’t expect Ali to wait another second once they were seated and alone. “Well, what do you want to know?” she says with a smirk.

“Duuuh, everything obviously. Stop teasing me, are you moving here or not?” the brunette says with an adorable pout on her lips, a pout that Ashlyn can’t resist.

“Fine, just because you’re asking so nicely princess,” the blonde replies with a laugh. “As I said on the phone, it all went fine after the miscommunication when I arrived,” she starts, still laughing.

During the next couple of minutes, she tells Ali all about her adventure in Duisburg before she figured out how to contact the club and what happened after that. “And yeah, the meeting went fine as well and we had a good talk. It really feels like they believe in me as their new goal keeper so I signed a 2 year contract as soon as I passed the health exam,” she says casually with a shrug before giving in and showing of a big smile.

Even though Ali had been pretty sure that was the case most of the day, she felt relieved when she finally got it confirmed. “Oh God Ash, I am so happy for you,” she says as she stands up, walking around the table to give her girlfriend a hug. “And I’m happy for me as well because now I get to have you in the same county, only a couple of hours away,” she continues as she walks back to her chair and sits down again.

“I’m happy for both of us as well,” Ashlyn answers, still with a huge smile on her face. “I’m happy for so many reasons. I get the opportunity to play for the best team in the Bundesliga, to live in, and experience, a new county, to do what I love most each and every day. But mostly, I am so, so, so happy that we won’t be an ocean apart. That we, even though I know we both will be busy with practices and games, will at least have the opportunity to spend a few days each month together. I can’t wait for that.”

The brunette sighs happily and tilts her head slightly to the right as she watches Ashlyn’s eyes sparkle with excitement. “I can’t wait either. And even though we won’t exactly live together, we will for the first time live in the same time zone at least,” she says laughing, with the same excitement in her eyes. “But we definitely have to discuss the whole ‘best team in the Bundesliga’ thing, just so you know, “she continues with a raised eyebrow. “Don’t think I didn’t hear that part.”

The blonde gives her a wink and laughs. “Whatever, I guess we will find out during the season who plays for the best team.”

“I guess we will,” Ali replies as she sticks her tongue out toward the blonde. “Have you told your family yet?” she then asks.

“Yeah I called them on my way back here. Mom and dad are really happy for me and Grams too, even though she’s sad that I’m leaving for the other side of the world. But she knows how much I wanted this, and she knows how much I want to be close to you so I think she’ll come around pretty quickly,” Ashlyn explains with a sad smile. “I will miss her so much, even if I have lived far away from home for a long time, it’s not the same thing as when I realized I’m moving across the ocean.”

“Believe me, I know. I truly love it here and I could definitely have seen myself staying in Europe when I’m done with soccer if it wasn’t for everyone I love and miss at home. No matter how happy this place make me, the people are more important,” Ali says with a shrug. “And it’s nothing wrong with missing them. It only means you really love them you know.”

“Yeah I know, but let’s talk about something else; I don’t want to ruin our night,” the blonde says as she takes Ali’s hand in her own over the table. “We should celebrate instead.”

“You could never ruin the night by being honest with me Ash. I know this is a huge decision for you and I know that it’s not exactly what you wanted to do. But believe me when I say that I’m more than thankful that you are doing this, for choosing to come here. Although I know it’s mainly for soccer, you chose this league and this country to be close to me and that means the world to me.”

“I would chose you all day everyday Al, even though it means moving across the world,” Ashlyn says with a shy smile as she raises her vine glass. “Cheers to use, finally living in the same country.”

“Cheers baby, I love you endlessly.”

 

“God I miss you babe,” Ali says as she leans back towards the headboard of her bed. “I wish you were her right now.” The two women are on the phone with each other, Ashlyn back in the states for a while, finishing up her rehab and taking care of the last details concerning her move across the ocean.

“Oh, and what would we do then?” the blonde says with a grin that Ali can’t see, but very much hear through the phone.

Ali doesn’t reply to the question, instead she asks her own. “What are you wearing?”

Ashlyn is slightly caught off guard by the brunette’s forwardness and doesn’t respond immediately. When she finally does, her voice is a bit lower than before. “Sports bra and boxers. You?”

“A tank top and panties,” she replies slowly while biting her lip. “What would you do if you were her right now Ash?” Even though they’ve been apart for most of their relationship, phone sex is something they’ve never tried. Ali has been way too shy to bring it up and Ashlyn didn’t want to push her into something she wasn’t comfortable with.

Ashlyn moans softly at the brunette’s words before answering, well aware of where this is leading and her voice even lower. “I would start kissing you, slowly and gentle,” she says as she lets her words sink in for a moment before continuing. “Then I’d deepen the kiss, stroking your lower lip with my tongue, begging for entrance,” she can hear how Ali’s breath hitches by her words and smirks. This is something completely new but she would lie of she said it wasn’t turning her on to no end.

“Uuh-hu, and then?” Ali manages to get out. She starts to get worked up by the blonde’s words and allows her hand to travel down towards her center.

“I would hover over you and placing my tight between your legs. I would leave your mouth and place kisses along you jaw before reaching your neck,” Ashlyn says and she can hear how Ali’s breath becomes heavier with every second. “I would spend a moment, sucking gently on the spot right below your ear, and then remove your top, cup your perfect breasts with my hands and slowly stroke your nipples with my thumbs.” Ali is not the only one breathing heavily by now, the blonde are getting more aroused for every second passing and she is slowly moving her hand through her own wetness. “Are you toughing yourself Alex?” she says in a husky voice, picturing Ali running her fingers through her own folds.

“I-I’m…yeah I am,” she gets out, all of a sudden somewhat shy. There is something about this that feels more intimate than actually being with each other.

“Good Alex, now imagine that it is my hand instead. Imagine me sliding my fingers up and down through your wetness, teasing you. Can you do that for me baby?”

Ali moans loudly. “Yes Ash, oh God, more please,” she says under her breath, knowing Ashlyn loves it when she’s begging.  

The blonde, who’s fingers been running lazily through her folds can’t resist picking up the pace, hearing Ali moaning makes her soaking. She moves her hand to her clit and starts rubbing it, telling Ali to do the same.

“It feels so good Ash, you feel so good,” Ali mumbles, lost in her own pleasure. “I need you baby,” she continues as she’s getting closer to climax.

“What do you need Alex?” the blonde asks, well aware of what she’s begging for, but still wanting to hear the words. She’s sliding two fingers into her own center with a gasp.

“I want you to fuck me Ashlyn, I want you to fuck me hard…please” Ali manage to say, almost falling over the edge by Ashlyn’s gasp and the thought of her pleasuring herself.

Another moan slips over the blonde’s lips and she has to slow down the pace to not come right away. “Yes babe, I’m slipping two fingers into you, pulling them out slowly before driving them back in, over and over again. Your pussy feels so good around my fingers Al. You’re so wet for me. Do you like what I’m doing to you?” Ash words are barely audible under her breath as she’s working herself towards orgasm.

“Yes Ash, you feel so good inside of me,” the brunette moans as she’s sliding her fingers in and out; imagine it is Ashlyn’s fingers that’s guiding her toward the edge. “I’m so close baby, I’m so close.”

“Alex, I need you to cum for me, can you do that?” Ashlyn says as she’s feeling her own orgasm approaching quickly. “I need you to cum babe.”

“I…fuck…Ashl…” with a high pitched moan, the brunette is falling over the edge. “Aaaah, fuck Ashlyn.”

Hearing Ali finishing herself is all Ashlyn needs, her own orgasm taking over her body within seconds and she moans the brunette’s name out loud.

After a few minutes of silence, when they both are trying to catch their breath, Ali’s the one breaking the silence. “I never done that before, and I never thought I would, ever,” she says with a chuckle. “But that was really hot and definitely not as uncomfortable as I imagined it would be.”

Ashlyn is laughing at how adorable Ali can be, even after they’ve just have talked each other to orgasm, but she quickly gets serious. “Indeed, but I don’t want you to feel uncomfortable around me ever, especially not when it comes to sex,” she says.

“I know, and I’m not. That was just my thought of it before, it felt perfectly natural when we, you know…did it,” the brunette says as she’s blushing, glad they are not on Skype. A thought that makes her blush even harder when she realizes what that would have meant and within a heartbeat she’s wet again. She debates with herself for a second before continuing. “Next time, if there is a next time and you want to, we could maybe do this over Skype?” she says shyly.

“Really?” Ashlyn asks with a hint of disbelief in her voice.

“Yeah really, if you want to of course. I think that would be even hotter,” the brunette admits as she once again lets her hand wander over her body down towards her center. “But I have to go now,” she says before Ashlyn notice her breath getting heavier again. “It’s late and I have practice tomorrow. I love and miss you Ash.”

“Love and miss you too, good night princess.”

 

Eventually Ashlyn moves to Germany and starts up the season with Duisburg. The Olympics comes and goes, their friends win the gold medal and Ali is there to support them. It’s a bitter sweet feeling to see it, knowing she could have been down there celebrating with them. When life goes back to normal, both Ali and Ashlyn are totally consumed with all their soccer duties and barely has time to talk, let alone see each other. Something that makes them both feeling frustrated. It was supposed to become easier when they both lived in the same county, only a couple of hours apart. That’s not the case though and every time they talk, it ends with a fight over something stupid. Ali is taking it out on Kyle for the hundredth time when they are on Skype.

“I just don’t get it. It’s worse now than when she lived in the states. At least she tried then, she was putting an effort to make it work. Now it feels like she doesn’t care anymore. I haven’t talked to her in two days, TWO FUCKING DAYS Kyle,” Ali all but yells.

“Jeeez Al, take it easy,” Kyle looks at her with concern, but he knows Ali well enough to know she’s probably over reacting. He also knows she’s not taking it well when someone is pushing her but he realizes that might be what she needs right now. “You don’t think this might have something to do with you having too high expectations on this whole ‘living-in-the-same-country’ thing?” he asks carefully.

“Who’s side are you on?” Ali snaps at him, but regrets it immediately. “Fuck, I’m sorry Kyle,” she says as she draws her hand through her hair in frustration.

“I didn’t know there were sides Al, but since you obviously think there is, you need to talk to your woman about it. I don’t want to be a bitch, but remember what happened last time you didn’t talk through your problems,” he says and waits for her to snap again, well aware of how much she hates herself for what happened to them after the World Cup a year ago.

To his surprise she starts to cry instead, tears slowly and quietly streaming down her face and that breaks his heart thousand times more than any shouting would have done. “Oh Al, I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have brought that up,” he says quietly.

“No, it’s okay. I needed to hear that, even though it hurts like hell. A part of me understands that she’s busy but I just miss her so much. And of course you’re right, I had so high expectations on this and I secretly hoped I would have her around more than I knew was realistic.” Ali sighs and wipes the tears away. “Thanks Kyle, for being the best.”

“Any time Alex, any time. Now, you don’t have a game this weekend right?”

“No I don’t, why are you asking?” Ali looks at him, slightly confused.

“Good, then call your woman and tell her you are coming to see her, and before you say that you have practice or something else to do, just do it and stop expecting her to come to you,” Kyle says with a sassy look on his face. “Alexandra Krieger, stop being a princess and show Ashlyn that you are both in this together.”

“But…I actually have practice on Sunday morning,” she says lamely and Kyle just rolls his eyes.

“Then I hope there is an early train leaving Duisburg Sunday morning. For god sake Alex, just do it and solve the details later,” he says, leaving no room for further arguments.

“Fuck Kyle, I hate that you always are right,” Ali says with a pout. “Even though this was a lovely chat, I need to hang up and call Ash to tell her I love her.”

“Good girl. And I’m always here for you. That’s what big brothers are for. And to scare boys away but that’s not really a problem in your case,” he says with a grin and a wink. “Now call the love of yours and make everything right.”

 

A few days later, Friday finally comes and when Ali ends practice she all but runs towards the locker room to collect her belongings.

“Someone’s in a hurry,” Nadine asks when she comes in and sees Ali throwing her things into the bag.

Ali blushes slightly and laughs. “Yeah, I have a train to catch. Going to Duisburg,” she says with a grin.

“Thought so,” the keeper says with a wink. “Have fun and make it back for practice Sunday.”

“I will,” Ali yells on her way out through the door.

For being someone that usually takes forever to get ready, she sets a personal record for showering, dressing and doing her makeup. Her bag is already packed and 45 minutes after entering the door, she’s in her car on her way to the train station.

With less than 2 minutes to spare, she takes a seat on the train next to an elderly lady. Within minutes she’ll be on her way to Ashlyn and for the first time in weeks, she allows herself to relax completely. She closes her eyes and her mind starts to wander, a certain blonde is all she can think about and she falls asleep with a smile on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A little bit of everything in this one, I hope you liked it.


	14. I Have Everything I Could Ever Want

Ashlyn is standing in the rain, waiting for Ali’s train to arrive to the station in Duisburg. They haven’t seen each other in weeks and for some reason, she’s almost nervous. She had been surprised when the brunette called a few days ago, starting the conversation by telling Ashlyn how much she loves her and continued with asking if she had plans for the weekend. If not, she could expect a visitor. Ashlyn was well aware of the fact that things hadn’t been the best between them since she moved to Germany and she was getting more and more frustrated. Ali didn’t seem to understand that she needed some time to adjust, to get to know her new teammates and her now home town. She was practicing harder than ever to show everyone she was good enough to be here and the only thing Ali talked about was how she didn’t care about their relationship anymore. Every conversation ended with one of them hanging up on the other and then they wouldn’t speak for at least 24 hours.

Everything about the last phone call was different. Ali had sounded happier, she had apologized for their last fight, she had apologized for being a bitch, and even said she understood that Ashlyn was busy with adjusting to everything. Since then they had texted constantly and now, here she was. Standing in the rain and nervously waiting for Ali to arrive. A few minutes passes and finally, after what feels like an eternity, she can see the train approach the station. The second Ali steppes out on the platform, all nervousness disappears and the blonde waits for Ali to catch her eyes with a huge grin on her face. There is nothing that makes her as happy as seeing her girlfriend, no matter how hard things is.

After a few seconds, Ali finds her among all the people and as soon as she sees the smile on the blonde’s face, her tears starts to fall and she starts to jog toward her. She drops her bags in front of her and jumps into her waiting arms, ignoring the fact that people can see them.

“I’m so sorry Ash. I’m so sorry for being mad at you, for fighting with you, and for acting like a child,” she mumbles into Ashlyn’s neck.

If the blonde hadn’t been fluent in Ali’s mumbling, she would never understand a word of what the woman in her arms are saying. Luckily she is and as a response she hugs her tightly. “I know babe, and I’m so sorry as well. It’s on both of us.”  

After holding on to each other for another couple of minutes, still standing in the rain, Ashlyn let Ali go and kisses her gently. “How about getting into the car and heading over to my place?” she says with a grin.

“That must be the best thing I’ve heard all day,” Ali smiles, and gives the blonde a quick peck on the lips before taking her hand as they starts to walk towards the parking lot, Ashlyn of course carrying Ali’s bags. Once they are seated and Ashlyn starts driving, Ali places a hand on the blonde’s tight as she closes her eyes and rests her head against the seat. “I’ve missed this,” she says quietly. “Being this close to you,” she clarifies as she slowly opens her eyes again and smiles toward Ashlyn. “I’ve missed you.”

 

For the first time in weeks, they are not fighting. As soon as they enter Ashlyn’s apartment, the blonde has Ali in her arms again. Holding her tightly without saying a word, both of them just enjoy being close to one another. There is no pressure over the situation and they both know they are good but Ashlyn feels a need to start and explain the situation from her point of view. This makes her release her grip around the smaller woman, walking over to the coach and sitting them down, wrapping her arms around her again. She takes a deep breath before speaking.

 “I really am sorry Al, I’ve been feeling off, I’ve been missing home, and I’ve been practicing so hard to show everyone that I’m worthy of this contract. I’ve been trying so hard to fit in here that I literally haven’t had any time or energy for anything else. Especially you since the only thing we seems to know how to do nowadays is to fight,” Ashlyn admits with a shrug. “That’s not what I want and I know that’s not what you want either. I’ve been doing a lot of thinking and I honestly believe that we both went into this with huge expectations, thrilled to finally be close and in the process we forgot everything that comes with the life of a professional soccer player,” she continues, desperately trying to put all her feelings into words. “I love you so much Alex and it kills me to fight with you, and it kills me even more when we are not speaking. I need you even though I might not have been the best when it comes to showing it lately but it’s the truth. I need to talk to you and I need to be able to tell you when I’m feeling down because there is no one that can pick me up as you can,” by now, tears are streaming down Ashlyn’s cheeks and she does nothing to hide them.

“Baby,” Ali says with tears in her eyes as well. “I’m so sorry for make you feel like you can’t talk to me. I’ll always be here, no matter what.”

“I’ve just been so lonely,” Ashlyn says as she continues to cry. “I miss home, I miss you, and I can’t really speak to anyone here because I don’t understand what they are saying,” she continues as she buries her head in the crock of Ali’s neck.

The brunette’s heart breaks over and over again as Ashlyn sobs. She feels like the worst girlfriend in the entire world for not noticing how Ashlyn felt. If she had known, she would have done everything in her power to make things better between them. Instead, she’s been moping around feeling sorry for herself for not having the blonde’s full attention, for not being the center of her world. “Ash, I promise you that from now on, I’ll do everything I can to make you feel more like home. I’ve been acting so selfish and if I could go back and change it, I would. You are my world and I don’t want you to feel anything but happy.”

“I know Al, I know,” Ashlyn says as she wipes her tears away.

When they air is cleared, they cuddle on the couch for a while, treasuring the moment they have together, before they head out to grab some food. The rest of the weekend is spent without any tears. They talk it all out again and agrees on bettering when it comes to listen to each other, as well as sharing things that bothers them instead of suffer and mope around in silence. Over all, they have an amazing weekend and when it’s over, they are being back to what they use to be, as in love as ever.

 

October 19 is coming up, and it kills Ali that she won’t be able to travel to Duisburg to spend the entire day with Ashlyn and celebrate her birthday from early morning with coffee together. If there is one thing she loves in life, it is birthdays. Not just her own, but others as well. She has done some planning, and a few things will be delivered to the blonde during the day but she could give up a lot to be able to wake up next to her girlfriend and spoiling her throughout the day. Unfortunately, soccer has to come first and just as always, it comes between them since they both have practice during Friday afternoon. She is, however, determined to make Ashlyn feel loved and celebrated even though she physically can’t be there, and then end the day with a huge surprise.

“Are you looking forward to Friday baby?” she asks when they’re on the phone with each other earlier during the week.

“Yeah I guess, don’t really think I will celebrate it though, don’t even think the rest of the girls know it’s my birthday,” Ashlyn says, trying to sound casual but Ali can hear she is somewhat disappointed. It’s not only Ali who likes birthdays.

“But Ash,” Ali says, almost pleading. “Of course you have to celebrate your birthday. It doesn’t matter that you’re not at home. Let some of the girl know and at least go out and eat something. Please?” she continues.

“We’ll see. I would be fine without celebrating it as well, you know,” Ashlyn says but Ali can hear that she’s trying to convince herself more than the brunette but before she can say anything else, Ashlyn changes the topic and Ali know better than trying to bring it up again. When Ashlyn is not in the mood of discussing something, she makes it clear by her tone and the brunette has learned the hard way not to fight it.

They talk for a few more minutes about their upcoming games, family, and life in general before they say goodbye, both of them in a hurry to practice.

 

 When Friday finally comes around, Ali wakes up before the sun rises and she finds herself laying restless in bed, unable to go back to sleep despite the early hour. She makes a quick calculation in her head, realizing it will most likely be at least 2 hours until it is acceptable for her to call Ashlyn. She’s well aware of how much her girlfriend loves sleeping in the morning, as long as she’s not by a beach at least, and don’t want to risk waking her up on her birthday.

A few minutes after 8am, she can’t wait any longer and after a quick run to the bathroom to fix her hair and brush her teeth (as if Ashlyn would be able to smell her morning breath through the phone) she’s back in bed and ready to call the birthday girl.   

After a last glance at her watch, she hits the call button and waits for Ashlyn to pick up, somewhat nervous for reasons she can’t understand. Might it be the fact that they are so close but yet so far away that have gotten to her.

For every time she can hear the signal, she gets more impatient and she is just about to hang up when the screen finally changes to “connecting” and a second later, Ashlyn’s face shows up. If the brunette hadn’t been so focused on wishing her girlfriend a happy birthday, she might have noticed that she had just woken up. But Ali, as impatient as ever, did not pay attention. She was just glad she finally had Ashlyn in front of her, even though it was through Facetime.

“Eeeeeeeeek, HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY,” she screams into the phone and Ashlyn has to move it a few inches away from her face to save her hearing. The blonde rubs her still sleepy eyes in an attempt to fully wake up as she laughs at her very much excited girlfriend.

“Thank you babe,” she manages to say before she clears her throat, still rubbing her eyes. 

“Oh fuck, I woke you up, didn’t I?” Ali says when she takes a closer look at Ashlyn and the realization hits her. “I’m so sorry babe, I really thought you would be up by now, I’ve been waiting to call you because I didn’t want to wake you up,” she rambles in true Ali-style and the blonde has to bite her lip to prevent herself from laughing again.

“Alex, breath,” she eventually interrupts her girlfriend. “Yes, you woke me up but don’t worry, my alarm was set to go off in a couple of minutes anyway,” she says to calm Ali down, a statement that is a complete lie but Ashlyn knows that the brunette has been laying awake for hours, waiting for her to wake up, so she don’t want her to feel more bad than she already does. She prefer begin woken up by Ali’s voice and face over the alarm anyways and in regards of the hour of sleep she’s missing out on, there are more important things in life than sleep she tells herself.

“No I really am sorry. I should have waited a bit longer to be sure. Or texted you first,” she continues and this time, Ashlyn can’t hold back a laugh.

“It really is fine Al, there is no way I would rather wake up to than to hear your beautiful voice anyway so don’t feel bad. And, since it my birthday, I get whatever I want today and what I want right now is for you to stop apologizing and instead start telling me how good I’m still looking even though I’m a year older,” the blonde says with a shit eating grin all over her face, and now it is the brunette who can’t suppress a laugh, especially not when Ashlyn starts to wiggle her eyebrows up and down in the most dorky, yet adorable way.

“Jeeez, I’m dating a 12 year old in a 27 year old body,” Ali replies, still laughing. “But yes, you look as good as ever, even in your morning hair.”

“Eeeey take it easy there woman, you love my morning hair,” Ashlyn says with a fake pout.

“I like it better when I’m the reason for the mess,” Ali quickly replies with a smirk and now it’s her turn to wiggle her eyebrows.

Ashlyn chuckle and looks at Ali in amusement when she’s all of a sudden overwhelmed by a wave of gratitude towards this beautiful brown haired woman who would move mountains to make her happy if necessary. Within seconds her eyes are filled with tears.

Ali can sense the change of demeanor and when she sees tears slowly streaming down Ashlyn’s cheeks, she panics. A second ago they were both laughinh. “Baby, what’s wrong?”

“N-Not-Nothing, nothing at all,” the blonde says between sobs but Ali is not convinced.

“But why are you crying? It’s your birthday, you should be happy. Why aren’t you happy?”

“That’s the thing. I am happy, I really am. I’m so happy and thankful to have you in my life. I don’t know who I would be, where I would be, or what I would do without you. You are my everything Ali and I’m just so thankful for everything you do for me, for making sure I’m feeling loved, for pushing me to be the best version of myself, and for loving me endlessly. Not just on my good days, but on my bad as well. I’m so happy that you are mine, so happy,” Ashlyn says as she’s looking at Ali with nothing but love in her eyes.

“Aaw baby, I love you so much. So, so much,” the brunette says, now crying as well.  “And I’m sorry that I couldn’t wake up next to you today,” she continues as she wipes her tears away. “But please, promise me that you make the most of the day? You will have a great time with your teammates. I promise.”

After practice when Ali checks Twitter, she sees an update from the blonde and before she can do anything about it, she tears up all over again.

_“I woke up this morning to a phone call with screams and eeeks along with heartfelt texts and messages. I have everything I could ever want.”_

She debates back and forth whether or not she should respond something publicly but eventually decides against it and settles for a text instead. That way she can be more real.

 **Ali:** You are everything I ever want. Hope you’ve had a great day this far baby. Love you to the moon and back.

 **Ash:** I love you too babe. It’s been good, a little lonely but we will grab food now after practice. Thank you for the flowers, balloons, and chocolate. It made my day. 

Ali smirks at the last part. If Ashlyn only knew she would get something much better than flowers and chocolate before the day is over. However, at the first part, Ali’s heart breaks a little and even though she’s glad that Ashlyn don’t feel like she has to hide anything, it makes her sad to hear. Earlier in their relationship, she would never admit she was feeling lonely, she would have said what made the brunette happy to hear.

When thinking back, Ali realizes how far they have come together and as individuals and even though the time after the world cup, and her actions, always will be something she regrets deeply, she can now with some perspective see that it helped the both of them. They needed to grow up separately in order to be able to have a healthy relationship.

The brunette snaps out of her thoughts when her phone starts ringing on the kitchen counter. She sees the name on the screen and smiles widely. After a glance at the clock she realizes she’s in a hurry. She picks up an already packed bag, grabs her wallet and car keys before rushing out of the apartment as she’s answering the phone.

“I’m on my way, just left home. I’ll pick you up in about 30 minutes. That’s ok?” she says before the person on the other end of the line has a chance to speak. She listens to the answer as she starts her car and exits the parking lot. “Mmhm, that’s great. Can’t wait. See you soon. Bye,” she finishes before putting down her phone and turning up the music, driving toward her first stop with the biggest smile on her face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, who do we think is coming?
> 
> Thank you for reading, this feels like another of those "in between" chapters but I needed to get this out in order to keep the story going. The next one will be more eventful, I promise.


	15. Surprise 2.0

“We should really go out tonight,” Elli Reed, Ashlyn’s fellow American on the team, says when they have finished their late lunch. “You’re only turning 27 once you know,” she continues and laughs at Ashlyn who’s sticking her tongue out towards her.

“Are you calling me old between the lines?” the keeper asks with a pout.

“Oh no, I would never,” Elli replies with a wink before turning serious again. “Bur honestly, I really think it would be a good idea to go out. We need to celebrate our birthday girl.”

Ashlyn is not convinced. Even though she has had a much better birthday up to this point, then she ever thought she would, the only thing she really wants to do is go back home, call Ali and spend a few hours on Facetime with her. She was disappointed that she didn’t get to spend this day with the love of her life, especially since they now are living so close to each other. But at the same time, she understood that Ali couldn’t drop everything to visit her. Soccer always had to come first and they were both well aware of that. Still, it hurt a bit.

“Nah, I think I’ll pass,” she eventually answers and is, to her surprise, met with six pair of eyes saying _I don’t think so._ “What? I’m just not in the mood,” she continues in self-defense.

“Ash, you don’t have a saying in this. It’s your birthday and we are going to celebrate you,” Jennifer Oster, another of the keepers teammates says with a smile.

“Exactly, it’s my birthday so shouldn’t I be the one who decides what to do?” Ashlyn answers, a bit harsher than intended. “Sorry, I’m just tired and to be honest, I just want to go home,” she admits.

“Ash, we know you miss your family, friends, and Ali. But I think it would be good for you to get out and have some fun. To take your mind off of those things you know,” Elli says with a warm smile, keeping her fingers crossed that Ashlyn will agree. They desperately need to get her out with them. Otherwise, there will be a really pissed off brown haired defender who will hunt her down and do who knows what.

Ashlyn sighs before answering; she knows she won’t win this one. And after thinking about it for a second, it might actually be fun. She has not really been out that much with her new teammates and what better way to get to know them a bit more than during her birthday. And they are right. It would probably be the best way for her to take her mind off of everything she’s missing. “Fine, you’re winning. We are going out,” she says with a smirk and the rest of the girls around the table start screaming and clapping their hands.

“Yes, I knew you wouldn’t back down. How about we all go home and get ready, and then we’ll meet up at the place right down the street from my place to grab some food and have a good evening,” Elli suggests and the rest of the girls agree.

When they are leaving the restaurant to go home and get ready, Elli sends a text confirming Ashlyn is on board with the plans for the evening and when she sits down in her car, she makes a victory dance. The evening is going to be so much fun.

 

Ashlyn gets home and glances at the clock with a deep sigh. She needs to jump into the shower soon in order to get to the restaurant in time; it had taken a while to get back to her apartment. Her phone buzzes with a text from one of her teammates, asking if they should grab a cab together since they live close. She agrees and they decide to leave in about an hour.

 

They enter the restaurant 10 minutes after the time they set up but are excused due to the awful traffic in Duisburg. Ashlyn sits down after hugging everyone around the table and in addition to the girls she ate lunch with, a couple of her other teammates are there as well. She notices four empty seats and Elli tells her they are still waiting for a few to arrive. The keeper is a little bit confused, she didn’t know she even knew this many people in her new hometown but leaves it and start chatting with the people closest to her. They order their drinks but informs their waitress, who’s flirting shamelessly with Ashlyn, that they will wait with the food until everyone is there. The blonde is sitting with her back against the entrance and are caught up in telling everyone a story when her eyes are being covered by a pair of hands. She freezes for a moment but relaxes when she feels a very familiar scent and her favorite voice whispers in her ear.

“Happy birthday baby,” Ali says and releases her grip around Ashlyn who immediately stands up and spins around, catching the smaller woman in her arms and hiding her face in the crock of her neck.

“What are you doing here?” she mumbles as she’s holding her tightly.

“You didn’t think I would let you celebrate your birthday without me, did you?” the brunette says with a laugh. “But no matter how much I love having you in my arms, you need to let me go now because I’m not the only surprise. I brought a few friends,” she continues as she slowly let go of the blonde whose head snaps up.

“Oh. My. God,” she whispers when she sees the three people standing a couple of steps behind Ali, patiently waiting for the blonde to notice them. Within a heartbeat, Ashlyn has walked past Ali and as she’s crushing Whitney in a hug, tears are starting to fall down her cheeks. After a few moments, she let go of one of her best friends and turns toward the other. Niki gets the same treatment as Whitney before she turns toward the last person. For a few seconds, she and Kyle look at each other seriously before both their faces turns into a giant smile and soon enough they are hugging as well. After their first meeting in Miami, they have stayed in touch and really hit it off. Therefore, Ali didn’t feel completely selfish when she invited her brother. She knew Ashlyn would love having him around for a few days as well.

Everyone around the table is smiling at the scene in front of them and they are all so happy for the blonde keeper. They know how hard this day has been for her and they have all had a really hard time keeping this secret to themselves. Ali had reached out to them in order to set up a surprise for her girlfriend and they were all more than willing to help, even though it meant lying Ashlyn straight to her face.

When Ashlyn is done hugging them all a second time, she turns back toward Ali with the biggest smile possible on her face. She pulls her in for another hug and whispers so only she can hear her. “Thank you for doing this, you always knows exactly what I need even when I don’t know it myself. I love you so much,” she says seriously.

“You deserve the best, never forget that. And I love you more than you will ever understand,” Ali says before letting go of the blonde and turning toward the people around the table. “Thank you all so much for helping me with this,” she says as she’s keeping Ashlyn close with one arm around her waist. “I couldn’t have done it without the all of you.”

The newly arrived walks around the table, greeting the people they haven’t met before, which is basically everyone. Eventually they are all ready to sit down and after a while, they can finally order their meals.

The evening is going by quickly and Ashlyn is having a blast together with people she loves. She’s catching up quickly with both Whitney and Niki and Kyle are having a blast, charming all the people around the table with his personality.

As time passes, Ashlyn finds herself watching the people around her. They are all form different places around the world, from different backgrounds, and they are all from different groups. She’s the link between all these people, she’s the reason they are all here. She glances over at Ali who’s sitting next to her, caught up in a conversation with Whitney on the other side of the table, but still with a hand lazily draped over Ashlyn’s tight. Ashlyn doesn’t listen to what they are talking about but it has to be something funny because suddenly, Ali breaks out into laughter and her signature nose crinkle shows up. The blonde smiles to herself when a realization suddenly hits her. No matter how sad she’s been during the day, how hard it was spending most of it away from the people she loves; she has everything she could ever ask for. Everyone around the table is her for her, even though she doesn’t know everyone that well, yet, they came here to celebrate her, to make her feel special. Niki came from Munich, Whitney and Kyle flew from across the world, and Ali’s the one setting it all up in order to surprise her.

 

Once they are done with their dinner they all pay and move outside of the restaurant where a line of cabs are conveniently waiting. “How about grabbing a few cabs and continue downtown?” it’s Elli speaking again and she looks over to the Germans among them to get their opinion, in the end of the day they know best what to do in the city.

When they have agreed, and suggested a place to go, they are splitting themselves up between the cabs and after a short drive, they pull up outside of the night club they decided to make their destination for the rest of the night.

The blonde is trying to give them all a bit of her attention but she finds it hard to leave Ali’s side. After a while, the brunette squeezes her arm and nodding toward the bar where Whitney is standing and waiting for her drinks. “I’m not going anywhere Ash, go and spend time with your friends,” she says with a warm smile. “They are all here for you.”

“You sure? I don’t want to leave you alone.”

“Ash I’m a big girl, I’ll find Kyle and force him to dance with me,” Ali answers with a grin. “You’re no fun anyway,” she finishes with a fake pout and a wink before turning away to try to find her brother.

Ashlyn sighs, but can’t resists grinning as well. Ali loves dancing, the blonde not so much. Especially not when she’s as sober as she is now. She follows the brunette with her eyes as she’s walking over the dance floor to where Kyle is sitting, still entertaining some of the girls. She can see how she places a hand on his shoulder, giving him her best puppy eyes in an attempt to convince him to dance with her. Knowing Ali, it won’t take many seconds until he agrees, whether he wants it or not. It’s impossible to say now to those eyes. She’s waiting until she sees him stand up to follow her, then she feels like Ali is in safe hands and she can turn her attention to the bar where Whitney is standing. 

“Hey you,” she says with a grin when she’s walking up and squeezes herself in next to her best friend.

“Hi stranger,” Whitney replies with a smile.

“Sorry,” Ashlyn feels like a jerk. Her friend flew across the world to see her and she has barely given her any attention this far except from a short conversation when they sat down to eat. “How are you? I know we haven’t really talked tonight, it’s been crazy.”

“You’ve been crazy about that girl of yours,” Whitney says with a wink, showing she’s only teasing Ashlyn. “But hey, it’s okay. If I had someone looking at me like Ali is looking at you, I would be crazy as well. Not to mention if I had someone looking as hot as she does tonight. I know I’ll get my time with you Ash,” she says and gives the blonde and tight side hug.

Ashlyn smirks as she’s raising an eyebrow. “Should I be worried you’ll try to steal her away from me Engen?”

“Nah, you can be cool. I’m still not playing for that team,” Whitney says with a laugh.

“Good, because I would not give that up without a fight and you know I’m stronger than you,” she answers with one of her own laughs. “But, on a serious note. You still flew her to surprise me and I’m a terrible friend that hasn’t taken the time to actually talk to you,” she continues as she’s scratching the back of her neck. “Ali had to kick me over her to leave her side.” The confession is followed by a sheepish smile and her eyes are wandering over the dance floor where she can see the brunette laughing along with her brother and some of the girls on the team.

“Ash it is cool, I promise. I’m just glad to be around, and we have the whole weekend so don’t think you get rid of me that easy. And soon I’ll be over here as well. It’s not that far between Duisburg and Liverpool you know.”

Before Ashlyn has a chance to answer, she’s crushed in a hug from behind. “Hi asshole,” Niki says before turning toward the bartender. “I’ll take two beers for me and my friend here,” she continues as she’s nodding at Ashlyn, noticing the still full drink in Whitney’s hand.

“One second,” is the reply she gets as the young German guy is walking away to grab their bottles. He returns and hands them over and Niki pays.

“So, how are my favorite Americans doing?” the shorthaired woman asks while sipping on her drink. “Feels good to be as old as I again Harris?”

“You’ll always be older than me Niki, don’t try,” the keeper answers. “But we’re good, I’m so glad to have you all here,” she says sincerely and smiles towards both her friends. “I just can’t believe that Ali got you guys here without me finding out. She’s usually really bad at lying. And so are you,” she says as she’s pointing at Whitney. “You didn’t let a word slip when we talked a few days ago.”

“That was completely out of fear you know,” Whitney answers. “Your girlfriend would have killed me if I’d ruined her surprise. She spent quite some time to organize it all.”  

“And, if she had to, that woman would walk on water for you,” Niki interjects with a laugh. “Don’t be surprised by anything she does, she’s completely hooked by you. For reasons I’ll never understand but that’s why we’re not dating,” she continues with a wink.

“You’re the asshole Niki, you know the girls can’t resist the Harris charm.” Ashlyn replies, smirking.

 

They continue to chat for a while before Ashlyn glances at her watch, feeling like it would be acceptable for her to go find Ali again. After a couple of beers, she’s now ready to dance with her lady. “Guys, I’m going to leave you here. Don’t want to leave Ali on her own with all the flocking guys for too long you know,” she says. “Thanks for the beers, I’ll find you later.”

She’s making her way over to the dance floor, trying to find the brunette among all the people, when Kyle comes up next to her. “Looking for your lady?” he asks.

“Yeah I do, I thought she was with you,” Ashlyn answers with a hint of panic in her voice. She’s well aware of the fact that Ali can take care of herself but that doesn’t mean the blonde won’t worry when they are out dancing and the brunette’s on her own. She knows what can happen.

“Relax, she’s just at the restroom, I think she followed Elli and some of the German girls over there,” Kyle can see the tension in Ashlyn’s jaw and looks at her with amusement. “Damn Harris, you’re down deep for my sister, aren’t ya?” he says with a grin.

She’s looking at him, somewhat confused. “Huh? What would that mean?” she asks, a little bit offended. He, if someone, should know how in love Ashlyn is with Ali. “You think that this,” she makes a motion with her index finger around the room, “and Ali is some sort of joke to me?” for every second passing she gets more worked up, she just can’t believe that Kyle is standing in front of her implying she might not be serious about his sister. “I know I had quite a bad reputation going in to this thing with Ali but that’s all in the past, and a reputation is all it was. I have never been a player and why would I start when I have the most beautiful girl in the world by my side?” she continues angrily and Kyle are just looking at her, jaw dropped.

“Wow, I am so sorry Ash. That was definitely not what I meant. Jeeez,” he says as he’s rubbing his face. Not really sure how the conversation turned out like this. “You know that I’m the first to support you guys. I would nev..”

“Fuck, I’m sorry,” Ashlyn quickly interrupts him. “I-I don’t know…I have absolutely no idea where that came from,” she says. “I know you know how much I love her, and that you support us no matter what. Fuck…I just,” she leaves the sentence hanging, rubbing her neck and looking down at her feet. Ashamed for snapping at Kyle without a reason.

“Hey Ash, look at me,” Kyle says as he’s nudging her with his shoulder. He stays quiet until she finally meets his eyes. “Go find Ali and take her home, you two need to spend some time together. Everyone here will understand that you want to be alone,” he says and nodding toward the restrooms where Ali’s coming together with a handful of the rest of the girls.

Ashlyn sighs, takes Kyle’s hand in her own and squeezes it tightly. “We might not have known each other for that long, but I love you, I hope you know that,” she says before giving him a hug.

“I love you too Ash. Now go find my sister, take her home and do thing I don’t want to know about,” he says with a wink as he gives the blonde a light nudge in the right direction.

Before she’s surrounded by all the sweaty people at the dance floor she turns around, sticks her tongue out toward him and fires of a wink.  

 

“Babe, I think I’m ready to go home now,” Ashlyn whispers to Ali when she finds her at the other side of the crowded floor. The brunette is talking to some of the girls on the Duisburg team and they were on their way over to the bar to order something to drink.

“What? Are you sure? The night is still young and we are here to celebrate you, you know” Ali says, somewhat irritated. She’s having a blast and can’t understand why Ashlyn would want to cut the night short, For all she knows, the blonde have had a good time as well.

Ashlyn sighs, “I know, I know. But to be honest, I didn’t want to go out in the first place. The only thing I wanted to do after lunch was going back home and Facetime you. I wanted to spend the rest of my birthday as close to you as possible and now when you are here, I just want to be with you, and only you. I’ve had an amazing night, with amazing people. But I am so ready to go home and lie down in bed next to you, just holding you and talk about everything and anything. I just want to go home Ali,” she says with a shrug.

The brunette is looking at her with nothing but love. “Of course we can go home baby, I want to be with just you as well,” she says as she’s giving Ashlyn a light peck on her lips. “I’m just going to tell Kyle, and you can go over to Whitney and Niki and let them know, okay? They are staying at a hotel tonight and I’m sure Elli can help them get there.”

When they have said their goodbyes to everyone, they make their way outside in order to grab a cab. While they are waiting, Ashlyn pulls the brunette’s back against her front, wrapping her arms around her and holds her tightly. Ali rests the back of her head against the taller woman’s shoulder and lets out a quiet sigh.

“God, I’m so glad that you are here,” Ashlyn finally says. “Otherwise I would probably have called you on my way home later, too wasted for my own good,” she continues with a chuckle. “And you would have been mad at me.”

 “Luckily, we don’t have to find out,” Ali replies with a smile. “I’m so glad to be here as well, for many reasons.” She turns around to face the blonde and cups her cheeks with her hands. “I love you Ashlyn Michelle Harris, and I will do everything in my power to make you feel happy,” she says before kissing a speechless blonde.

“Wow, for a moment there I thought you would propose to me,” Ashlyn finally says and Ali’s eyes are going wide.

“What?” she chokes out and the blonde can’t resist laughing at the terrified look on her face.

“When you started by using my whole name, I thought you were about to propose. I don’t know why, it was just the first thing that popped up in my head,” she explains, still laughing.

“Hold your horses Harris, let’s not get too carried away here,” Ali’s now laughing as well.

I know, and I love you too babe,” the blonde answers as she’s kissing her girlfriend slowly, now caring about the people around them.

When they finally are sitting in the car on their way back to Ashlyn’s apartment, Ali turns toward her girlfriend with an amused expression on her face. “What would you have answered?” she finally says.

Ashlyn, who’s thinking about something completely different are not sure what the brunette is aiming on. “What?”

“If I had popped the question you know, asked you to marry me, what would you have answered?” she bites her lower lip, like she’s nervous to hear the answer.

Ashlyn looks at her for a second before answering. “I would have said yes of course. You’re my end game Alex, and there is no doubt that I one day will marry you. But I don’t think that day will come any time soon. We both have a bit too much going on to focus on that kind of stuff,” she says with a wink before kissing Ali. “I love you Alexandra Krieger, more than everything, we don’t need to put a ring on it to make it real.”

“I love you too Ash,” Ali says before taking the blonde’s hand in her own and turning her gaze to look out into the dark Duisburg night with a grin on her face. Her life is better than she ever thought it would be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, thank you for reading, leaving kudos and comments. 
> 
> I have gotten a few comments over the fact that you guys like the longer chapters I'm providing you with. Would you like that to continue, and the chapters will continue to be farther apart, or would you prefer more updates but shorter chapters? Let me know!


	16. I’ll Go Wherever You Go

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am back!! Sorry for going MIA for awhile, or a few months.. I had a thousand things going on and no motivation to write but hopefully that will change now. Hope you are still with me and would like to follow the rest of this story.

Ali is sitting on the bus when her phone buzzes. They are on their way north to play Duisburg in the league and the brunette is nervous. She picks her phone up and sees a notification from twitter and smiles; she knows exactly who has tagged her. She opens up Ashlyn’s account and sees two tweets.

_“Gameday vs FFC Frankers! Eeeeek. :)”_

_“@AlexBKrieger if u try to score on me well, I have a very particular set of skills; skills I have acquired over a very long career #_ _death_ _”_

Ali just shakes her head, still smiling. Of course Ashlyn had to take the trash talk to the public scene, she didn’t expect anything less from her girlfriend. When they were talking on the phone earlier during the morning, the blonde sounded mostly excited compared to Ali. She didn’t know why, but for some reason this game would be strange to play. She had never been on the opposite side of the field from Ashlyn and even though she knew she would give 100 percent and do her job once out there, she just couldn’t imagine seeing the blonde doing the warm-up in another team’s jersey.

She is pulled back to reality when her phone buzzes once again, this time with a text from Ashlyn.

**Ash:** Hope the bus ride is going fine, I just left for pre-game meal. Can’t wait to see u. Love u lots.

When the game is over, Ashlyn sits down inside the 18-yard box. The score board shows 3-1 to Frankfurt and the blonde keeper is disappointed even though she knows she played well and saved them from further embarrassment. She sees Ali on the other side of the field and takes a deep breath to collect herself before standing up to walk over to her girlfriend. No matter how disappointed she is over loosing, she can’t keep herself from feeling somewhat happy and incredibly proud over Ali and her performance.

Together with the rest of her teammates, she says her thanks to the Frankfurt players and spends some extra time talking to Ali and the girls she know. They all decide to go out and have some fun during the evening while the Duisburg players are still in town, something that both Ali and Ashlyn are looking forward to. A good night out with friends is exactly what the both of them needs.  

 

Thanksgiving is coming up and Ali, who has spent the past years overseas and missed countless holidays, birthdays, and anniversaries, are more used to being away from her family then what the blonde is. Ashlyn is having a hard time coming around the fact that she will not be able to be with her family this year and even though she has no reason to take it out on Ali, that’s exactly what she does when they’re talking on FaceTime late one night.

“No Ash, just no. I’m not going to go over this again. You are welcome to come here over Thanksgiving but if you are planning on being pissed off and grumpy the whole time, don’t bother,” Ali is quickly losing her temper as she’s listening to the blonde’s whining over not being stateside. “I know it’s hard, and I know it sucks but if you don’t want to spend the holiday all alone in your apartment, suck it up.” Sometimes the only thing that helps getting Ashlyn back on track is tough love. 

The brunette can hear that she got through to her girlfriend when Ashlyn sighs loudly on the other end of the line, and when her face softens; Ali knows she’s the one walking out of the argument as a winner. “I’m sorry babe,” the blonde says softly. “I never meant to take it out on you,” she continues as she’s rubbing her face. “It’s just a lot going on and I can’t imagine being so far away from home now, Thanksgiving is one of the most important holidays in our family.”

“I know Ash, I know. But both you and I know that we can’t really do anything about it. So are you coming here or what?” Ali says as she’s giving Ashlyn a stern look.   

Another sigh leaves the blonde before she replies. “Of course I’m coming, and I know that I’m childish. I’m sorry.”

“You are not childish Ash, I understand why you are frustrated and I know it really sucks. I’ve learned the hard way that you have to sacrifice a lot when you follow your dreams,” Ali says with a smile. “Anyway, when do you think you’ll be here?” she continues quickly, changing the topic to not fall back into arguing.

“We’re having a morning practice at Wednesday and should be done around 11 so I could probably catch the train around 2 and be in Frankfurt at 4, how does that sound?” the blonde asks as she’s looking up the train schedule on her computer.

“I think that will work, I should get out of practice at 3:30 so I can go straight to the station and pick you up then,” Ali replies with a nose crinkling grin. “I can’t wait for you to get here, I miss you.” It’s less than 3 weeks since they last saw each other but it doesn’t matter if it’s two days or two months, the brunette misses Ashlyn just as much either way.

“I miss you too Alex, two more nights,” the blonde sighs at the thought, trying to convince herself more than Ali that it’s not that bad.

The brunette does not answer, instead she settles for a nod and a small smile. “Have you heard the rumors?” she then asks after a few moments of silence.

“About the league?” the blonde replies, despite knowing that is exactly what Ali is talking about. It has been going on for a while now, the rumors about a new professional league for women in the states. In all honesty, it is more than rumors since several clubs has made announcements during the fall but there is still nothing that is finalized.

“Yeah, I’ve heard about it for a while but it has been a lot more just the past couple of weeks,” the defender says, trying to make it sound casual.

“I know, I talked to Tobin the other day and she said everyone is talking about it back home. Apparently they believe there will be some sort of announcement from U.S Soccer or something soon,” Ashlyn shrugs as she says it. Just like Ali she tries to play it of like it’s no big deal.

“And…how do you feel about that?” Ali says somewhat hesitantly, they have both been aware of that something is going on back home but neither of them has really addressed it up until now.

The blonde shrugs again and takes a deep breath before answering. “Alex, I think you know how I feel about it.”    

Ali does know, but that doesn’t make the thought any easier. It is no secret that the blonde would have stayed in the states to play if there would have been a league; she’s only in Germany because of lack of a better option. “I do…” Ali says with a small, but painfully sad smile.

“Hey, stop. There is no reason to think about it, or make assumptions before we even know anything for sure. I have a contract with Duisburg. I’m right here with you, I’m not going anywhere,” Ashlyn smiles back, hers less sad than Ali’s.

“Ash, there will most certainly be a league back home come spring, and I know that you’ll be dying to go back if the option is there. There is no need to hide that fact and I do not hold that against you,” Ali knows the blonde too well sometimes and now she is well aware of the fact that her girlfriend is trying to down play the situation to not upset her.

“Can we please just talk about this during the weekend babe? It is no big deal as it is right now anyway,” the blonde is not up for debating back and forth whether or not she wants to go back to the states if she gets the chance. She can also feel that a new argument is on its way.

“Fine, but just so you know, we will talk about it because it will become reality sooner rather than later,” Ali replies before they say their goodbyes to go to bed.

 

Ali is more right than any of them thought when she made that last statement. When they wake up the day before Thanksgiving, the same day as Ashlyn is taking the train down to Frankfurt, both their phones are completely blown up by texts and notifications. Apparently there had been some major announcements over in America while they were asleep and it does not take long for them to understand what it is all about.

It is a sealed deal; there will be a new professional league for women’s soccer in the United States when spring arrives. The league is still nameless but all eight teams that are going to be a part of it has been announced and Ali’s heart almost stops when she reads the confirmation. _Washington Spirit_ , there will be a team in DC, a team at home. She reads it over and over again and right then and there she makes a decision. It is time to go home.

 

The next day, Ashlyn wakes up in Ali’s bed and she can’t resist grinning like an idiot when she is watching the still sleeping brunette. There is nothing that can beat the feeling of waking up with Alexandra Krieger’s head on your shoulder and her arm lazily draped over your torso, the both of you completely naked. The blonde thinks back to the previous night and the grin grows bigger. There might actually be one feeling that beats the one she’s feeling now. An Alexandra Krieger when she’s falling over the edge and the only thing she gets out is your name, over and over again. Ashlyn can’t think of a more beautiful sight that Ali mid orgasm, one of the rare moments when she lets go of all control.

The blonde in brought back to reality when she feels a feather light kiss on her shoulder, then another a bit closer to her neck. Ali is awake and she is prepping kisses over her girlfriend until she reaches the corner of her lips.

“Good morning baby,” she mumbles sleepily.

“Morning beautiful,” Ashlyn replies as she lifts her head to catch Ali’s lips in a proper good morning kiss, not satisfied as it is.

“You ready to celebrate the best German Thanksgiving that ever has been celebrated in the history of German Thanksgivings?” Ali says smiling when she finally pulls back from their make out session, knowing how much there is to do during the day, she does not have time to let it go any further than just making out.

Ashlyn is pouting, knowing that she won’t get anything more from the brunette at the moment. She kisses Ali one final time before rolling out of bed. “Yes I am, let’s get the chicken roasted, the potatos mashed, and the mac cheesed.” Ali just shakes her head; she’s dating a five year old.  

During the rest of the day, they are preparing their improvised Thanksgiving dinner to later enjoy it while the apartment is being filled with laughter and joy, the blonde almost forgotten everything about loneliness and sadness over not being in Florida with her family. Home is where Ali is, and in the end of the day, it doesn’t matter if they are stateside or anywhere else in the world as long as they are together. 

 

A week and a half later, Ashlyn is on the train to Frankfurt again. Both of them played their last game before Christmas break the previous day and now have a few days of before entering a practice period up until they officially are on break.

The blonde can sense that something is off as soon as Ali hugs her at the station but doesn’t push it. When Ali’s ready, she will let her know what it is that is bothering her.

As she predicted, not many minutes after they enter the apartment Ali’s standing in the kitchen looking at her nervously. “I’m leaving”, she blurs out after a few moments of silence and in true Krieger fashion, she does it in a mumble that anyone that is not Ashlyn would have had a hard time understanding.

“You’re doing what?” the blonde asks as she is staring at her girlfriend somewhat confused.

“I-I’m…I’m leaving to go back and play at home. I’ve cleared it with Frankfurt, they agreed on letting me go now instead of when the season is over,” she mumbles hesitantly, afraid to say the wrong thing.

“Jeeez Alex,” Ashlyn says as she’s running her hands through her hair. “You’re going to be the fucking death of me, you know that right?” she continues with a chuckle.

“You…you’re not mad?” the brunette stutters out as her eyes goes wide. She was prepared for the worst and Ashlyn’s laugh is taking her by surprise.

“No of course not, I know that this is what you want. You’ve been away from home for so long, it’s a no brainer. I would love to go home as well but I don’t think Duisburg would let me go as it is right now. I’m disappointed, but not mad,” Ashlyn replies with a shrug as she grabs the brunette by her waist and pulls her closer into a hug.

“You are too good to me Ash,” Ali says into the crock of the blonde’s neck as she’s holding on to her as her life depended on them not loosing contact. “What did I do to deserve you?”

It’s not really a question, more of Ali stating how grateful she is and therefore, Ashlyn do not answer, she just tightens her grip and holds the brunette even closer. “Germany is going to suck without you,” she finally says.

“You’ll be fine, and there will be national camps that you hopefully will be allowed to attend. You’ll be back stateside in no time,” Ali tries to sound more positive than she is. She is well aware of what an affect her decisions has not only her own life, but on Ashlyn’s as well. The blonde moved across the ocean to be with her, and now she’s the one leaving as soon as she gets the chance while Ashlyn is tied to a contract in a place where she didn’t really wanted to be in the first place.

 

Later that night they receive an email from U.S Soccer, letting them know they will pick three clubs as their preferred destinations, and then leaving the final decision to a panel that are supposed to allocate not only the U.S players, but the Canadian and Mexican as well among the eight clubs. Along with the email there is information about the importance of having national team players on U.S soil, which will make it easier to attend camps. Without saying it in exact words, both Ali and Ashlyn understands the meaning. If you don’t play in the new league, don’t expect to be called up to the national team.     

“Sooo, I guess we have to pick where we want to play,” Ashlyn says after reading through the email a few times.

“Yeah I guess so. New York is on the list,” the brunette says with a nod toward the computer. Knowing that Ashlyn loved to play for them, she figured that would be the blonde’s first choice.

“I saw that, but I don’t think that’s where I want to play,” she answers hesitantly.

“Why?” Ali looks at her a bit confused.

“Well, I figured your first choice would be the Spirit since it is home for you. And I guess I could get used to live in DC as well,” Ashlyn answers with a smirk.

“You…what?” Ali just looks at her, not really sure she heard right.

“If you want to of course,” Ashlyn immediately backtracks. “I just thought that now when we have the chance, I’d really like to play together with you. Maybe moving in together, you know, start this for real. If you want me to, I’ll go wherever you go.”

Ali leans over to the blonde and wraps her arms around her neck, holding her for a moment before letting go enough so she can look into the hazel colored eyes she loves so much. “I’d love to play and live with you in DC. But what about Duisburg?”

“We’ll figure something out, first of all, we have to fill out what teams we could consider play for,” Ashlyn says as she gives the brunette another hug. “What would be your second choice?”

“How about you decide the second one and then we agree on the third one together?” Ali suggests as she leans into Ashlyn’s side as they are reading through the list of clubs once again.

“Yeah, that sounds perfect,” the blonde replies as she places a kiss on Ali’s temple.

 

On Christmas morning, a buzzing phone is waking Ashlyn up way earlier then she is happy about and she mumbles a few less appropriate words before rolling over to the other side of her bed. The crankiness quickly disappears when she sees Ali’s face on the screen and she answers immediately.

“Morning babe,” she mumbles, still half asleep.

“Good morning, and Merry Christmas baby,” Ali says on the other end, doing nothing to hide her excitement. There is probably nothing she loves as much as she loves Christmas, except for maybe her birthday, the one two times she shamelessly can expect people to give her presents.

“Wow, what time is it? I know you love Christmas but isn’t this a bit early for this kind of enthusiasm?” the blonde says sarcastically as she rolls her eyes. Happy that her girlfriend can’t see her.

“Excuse me if I love this day, and excuse me again if I wanted to start the best day of the year with talking with you,” Ali pouts. “You are not exited at all?”

“I’m sorry, I was just joking. I’m glad you called. Of course I’m excited, I love this day. I’m just struggling with the early hour, that’s all. Are the others awake?” Ashlyn asks, referring to Ali’s mom, step dad and Kyle.

“Nah I don’t think so, I haven’t heard anything from the rest of the house at least. Still peacefully quiet. Why?”

“What are you wearing?” Ashlyn asks with a smirk that the brunette can hear through the phone.

“Seriously? It’s Christmas morning,” Ali laughs, but she would lie if she said Ashlyn’s suggestion didn’t turn her on.

“Why not? It’s not like a little naughtiness would take you off of Santa’s gift list,” Ashlyn laughs. “So, what are you wearing princess?”

“A t-shirt and leggings, you?” the brunette mumbles. Even though she’s usually not shy when it comes to sex, phone sex is an exception.

Ashlyn smirks again, knowing Ali’s never completely comfortable in the beginning, while she’s still capable of thinking about and analyzing everything she’s saying. “Hmm, that sounds too much to my ears, I only have a sports bra and boxers. I think you need to take that t-shirt off Miss Krieger.” 

Ali can hear the teasing in Ashlyn’s voice and puts the phone on speaker as she sits up a bit to strip her t-shirt off. The same moment as she grabs the hem and starts pulling it over her head the door to her bedroom bursts open and Kyle comes running inside.

“Merrrrry Christm….aaaaah, Oh. My. God. Alexandra Krieger, it is Christmas morning. What are you doing?”  When he sees his sister sitting up in bed, shirt halfway off, he stops abruptly and covers his eyes with one of his hands.

Ali quickly lets the t-shirt drop back down, covering up her abs again and she clears her throat twice before speaking. “Eehm, I’m on the phone,” she says as her face is turning red.

“You’re on the pho…ooooh,” Kyle first looks confused before he realizes what she means, his expression instantly changes to mortified. He sees Ali’s phone on the bed next to her and mimes “ _Who is it?_ ”

Ali doesn’t even respond, she just gives him a look saying _seriously, who do you think it is?_

“Eehm, hi Ash,” he says hesitantly.

Ashlyn, who has been quiet up till this point laughs on the other end, instantly making Ali relax again. “Hi Kyle, what’s up?”

“Well I came in here to wish my baby sister a Merry Christmas but will instead be scared for life after seeing her getting undressed while, what I assume, being naughty with you on the phone. Thank God I did not wait a few more minutes before walking in here,” he says, now laughing as well.

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Ashlyn says, chuckling lightly.

“And I’m sorry to interrupt but I need to borrow my sister for the annual Instagram post so we have to cut this chat short.”

“Kyle please, can you give us a few minutes to say good bye?” Ali pleads as she is nodding towards the door.

Kyle sighs but stands up. “Fine, but no funny business though. I’ll be back in five minutes. Bye Ash, miss you tons.”

“Miss you too KK, have a good day and take care of your sister for me,” the blonde replies before she can hear the door closing as Kyle leaves the room. “Wow, that was close,” she continues when she’s sure they are alone again.

“Ashlyn Michelle Harris, my brother almost walked in on me having phone sex,” Ali scolds. “It’s nothing to laugh about.”

“Babe, he didn’t see anything, relax,” the blonde tries to convince her. “And since we only have a few minutes before he is back, I need to talk to you about something.”  

“Okay, what is it? Is everything okay?” Ali says, a bit concerned now.

“Yes of course, everything is fine. I’m just missing you so much and…I don’t know, I was thinking that maybe, if you want me to, I could maybe…you know…drive down to Miami after lunch,” she trails of, a bit nervous since they had decided to spend Christmas apart. “If you want to of course and if your mom is okay with it. I just thought…we’re done with our Christmas stuff after lunch and I just miss you so much Alex, I just want to spe…” she continues before Ali stops her.

“Ash, shut up and stop rambling,” the brunette laughs. “I’d love it if you want to drive down here and I know my mom would love to have you here as well. I don’t expect you to spend 3 hours of your Christmas day in the car but I would still love if you came. I miss you as well,” she continues and tries to hide a laugh when she can hear how Ashlyn relaxes on the other end.

“I’d love to spend 3 hours in the car if it means that I will see you tonight. And I’m sorry for being weird. I just don’t want to interfere with your family stuff.”

“Ashlyn, you are my family. And the rest of them love you as well so don’t worry. Let me know when you are leaving and I’ll be here waiting for you,” Ali says, smiling from ear to ear.

“Perfect, I’ll text you later. And I see you in a few hours. I love you Alex.”

“Love you too, drive safely, have a good time with your family and tell them I said hi,” Ali says before they end the call.

Not a minute later Kyle is back, but this time he is knocking before opening the door. “Is it clear for me to come in?” he says jokingly, his hand covering his eyes as he enters the room.

“Very funny Kyle, but yes it is,” Ali says, still with the biggest smile on her face.

Kyle looks at her for a moment before saying anything. “That must have been a good goodbye, why the smile Alibean?”

“Well, Ash decided she missed me too much so she is coming here tonight,” she answers with a grin.

Kyle laughs for a second before walking over to hug Ali. “I’m so glad for you, even though I feel lonely and unloved every time I see the two of you being all cute together. Anyway, it is time for a phoooooto.”

Ali’s already smiling brightly so when Kyle snaps the picture, they are both grinning into the camera. “Perfect,” Kyle says. “This one is going up on Instagram.”

Half an hour later, Ali sees that she has a couple of notification from twitter. She opens them and sees a tweet from Ashlyn and a reply from Kyle.

_“@Ashlyn_Harris: @KyleKriegerHair @alexbkrieger you rush me off the phone for this… I need more from you divas… #werk” See you tonight!_

Ali smiles, _tonight,_ she will she the love of her life tonight already and not in a week as the original plan was. She laughs at her own happiness before walking downstairs to let her mom know about the change of plans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, is anyone still with me despite the lack of updates during the past couple of months?


	17. Are You Really Coming Home?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another couple of months since I updated and once again, I'm sorry for that. This time though, I've been writing for a while to have a bit more of the story already written when I'm posting this. Sooo...depending on you response and comments, there might be a new update within the next couple of days!

It is official. The allocation is finished and both Ali and Ashlyn have been placed with the Washington Spirit. Ali is looking at the email, reading it over and over again. She is going home. She is going home and this time it feels good, it is her own choice and it is the right choice. There is only one problem left; Duisburg refuses to let Ashlyn go. They are having a hard time as it is and are not happy about her wanting a release only half a year into the two year contract she signed during the summer. 

Ashlyn leaves the states the day after the allocation draft is finished to go back to Germany and start the second part of the season. Their games will not start in another month but the break is over and they are back in practice. Much needed practice to say the least. Ashlyn has what she refers to as a Swiss cheese in front of her. Their backline is leaking constantly and it is only so much you can do as a goalkeeper. Neither less to say, they desperately has to get it together.  

“No, I do understand. It just…it’s not what I want and they should understand my situation as well. If I want a shot at the national team, I need to move back home,” Ashlyn is on the phone with her agent, walking back and forth in her apartment trying to come up with a solution that the German club could agree on. The NWSL season does not start until March, but as it looks at the moment, Duisburg won’t let her go until the season is over, which wouldn’t be until mid May. That would make her miss the whole preseason as well as the first month of games.

“Yes, I know you do everything you can. Just let me know when you’ve talked to them again. Thank you. Bye,” she sighs for God knows which time today and throws her phone on the bed. The situation is getting frustrating, mostly because now she is all alone. Ali is home with her family while she had to fly back on her own. She didn’t really like Germany in the first place, but at least she had Ali only a 2 hour train ride  away, now there is no one. 

 

Pia left the job as the head coach for the national team in October. She was offered to come home and coach Sweden and even though the team was sad to see her leave, they understood her decision and were happy for her. It had been a dream of hers to go home and when the job was offered to her, she could not say no, despite the fact that she was coaching one of the absolute best team in the world. 

As Pia left, Tom Sermanni was named the new coach and from one second to another, almost everyone that had been in the loop for competing about a spot felt unsure. Tom came in with a new approach and was determined to create his team from scratch. No matter how many caps you had, if you didn’t show you deserved a spot, you were out. This was new and definitely terrifying for many of the players. 

Ali had yet to be called into camp after her injury, and without the safety net that a coach that was familiar with what you could do meant, the brunette was nervous during the days leading up to the release of the roster for the February camp. She felt ready and in better shape than ever but she was still not completely sure of herself on the field. 

A week later when the roster for the upcoming camp is released, both Ashlyn and Ali is on it and after discussions with Tom Sermanni, the question marks regarding the blonde’s residency is straightened out. She will not attend the entire camp but parts of it, and she will be available for the both games they will play against Scotland. 

The camp comes and goes, Ali plays the whole first game and most of the second while Ashlyn did not see any time at the field, as usual. It had become harder and harder for the blonde to appreciate call ups, what was the point when she didn’t even get dressed for the games. No matter how good the team was, being the fourth goalkeeper did not provide a bright future in her eyes. The most painful part of it all was that she could not say anything to Ali about it all. The brunette had walked into the camp exactly a year after her knee surgery, she had done fantastic and she was happier than Ashlyn had seen her in a long time. She could not be the one ruin that by pouring her own insecurities over her girlfriend. So she does what she always do, puts a lock on her feelings and shows a smile towards everyone, including Ali, up until she has to fly back to Germany. 

When she arrives to her empty apartment in Duisburg, she breaks down. She cries for hours about the fact that she’s a failure. It’s not until she has no tears left that she realizes how pathetic she is. Here she is, playing soccer professionally in one of the best leagues in the world, she is a part of the USWNT player pool, and she has the love of her life a phone call away. After a short pep talk with herself, she leaves bed and takes care of her luggage, everything needs to be perfect because tomorrow is a new day. A day when she is going to work harder than anyone else, a day for her to learn, to improve, and to be the best version of herself that she possibly can be. Tomorrow is going to be a good day. 

 

After one of her practices with Duisburg the week after the national team camp, Ashlyn gets called into the head coach’s office. He starts the unofficial meeting with emphasizing how happy and satisfied the all are over what she has brought to both the club and the team before continuing with explaining that they’ve been looking over the situation a bit more and wants to give her a release as soon as possible. They know that she’s not happy there and they can’t force her to stay. An unhappy player is never a good player. 

Ashlyn looks at him in disbelief and it takes a few moments for her to realize what he’s saying, but once she does, a huge weight is being lifted from her shoulders and she sighs in relief. It looks like she is going home to Ali a lot sooner than they both thought. 

During the rest of the meeting, they are going over details and comes to an official agreement. Within a couple of days, she will no longer be a Duisburg player. 

As soon as she’s leaving the office, she calls her agent, who of course already knew about the news after a heads up from Duisburg before the meeting with the keeper. Another hour later, she gets a phone call from DC, the Spirits head Coach Mike Jorden has been notified about the change of plans and wants to officially welcome her to the Spirit and let her know that he is excited to start pre season with a goalkeeper with her experience and knowledge on his roster. 

When they hang up, her fingers are ghosting over Ali’s contact in her phone. She knows she should call her, but she wants to make it a surprise. After debating back and forth for a moment she decides against calling, instead making up a plan to tell her in person when they see each other. She has to let someone know to prevent exploding from excitement so she calls the one person she consider almost as much family as her girlfriend, Whitney. 

A quick call to update her turns into a two hour conversation. Whitney is, obviously, extremely excited for her friend, can’t wait for her to be back stateside and after a couple of weeks without talking, they have a lot to catching up to do. After Whitney promising, no less than three times, that she won’t say anything to Ali, they end the call so Ashlyn can start packing. If she’s on the roster for the Algarve Cup, she will leave Germany and go straight to Portugal exactly a week from now and then continue directly to the US when the tournament is over. With her belongings needed to be shipped before she leaves, she has some packing to do to say the least. 

Two days after the meeting with the Duisburg coach, she gets the email from US Soccer, saying she is on the roster for the Algarve Cup. With only a couple of days remaining, she gets the last of her things packed up, labeled, and ready to be sent across the world. 

 

Ashlyn, along with all other players representing European clubs, arrives to Portugal a few hours a head of the flight coming from the US with the majority of the team. Everything is already set up and they gets a ride to the hotel and is assigned their  room. Ashlyn tries to kill some time before the rest of the team, or mostly Ali, arrives. She has har bags unpacked in nio time, and consider taking a walk through the hallways but decides to lay down and watch some tv instead. Before she knows it, she is asleep and does not wake up until a key is slide through the door lock and no one less than Kelley O’Hara is bursts in to the room. Still a bit out of it, the blonde sits up in bed, trying to erase the sleep from her eyes but before she knows it, she's trapped against the mattress underneath Kelley, who without a sign of hesitation lunched herself onto the blonde before the door had even closed behind her. 

”Haaaaaaaaarris,” she screams as she's pinning the keeper down and jumping slightly on top of her. 

”Kelley, I swear to God, if you're not of me within the next 3 seconds, I'm not responsible for my actions,” Ashlyn gets put from underneath her, somewhat strained due to their position. 

”I can't hear you down there,” Kelley continues with a mischievous grin as she starts to tickle the blonde but regrets it immediately when Ashlyn forces her away and down on the floor. 

”What did you say,” she retorts, now standing over her friend with a foot on her back, pushing her down. ”I can’t hear you down there.” 

”Fine, I give up, I give up. You win,” Kelley gets out between laughter. ”Let go of me, please.” 

Ashlyn complies and helps the shorter woman up on her feet and brings her in for a hug. ”I’m glad to see you too O’Hara,” she says as she smiles warmly. ”Buuuut, I’m going to leave you on your own for a while, there is someone I’m more excited to see,” she continues with a wink as she goes to collect her phone and room key before leaving the room. 

 

“Hey princess,” she says as she walks down the hallway towards Ali, who is standing with her phone in her hand, texting the blonde.  

Ashlyn’s voice startles Ali and her head shoots up quickly. “Eeeeeek, you are here,” she exclaims with a huge grin. “I was just going to text you to let you know which room I’m in.”

“I already knew, might have peeked on the rooming list before I even looked for my own,” the blonde admits with a wink. “Come here,” she continues as she open up her arms to engulf her girlfriend in a tight hug. “I’ve missed you.” 

“I’ve missed you too, so much,” the brunette mumbles into the crock of Ashlyn’s neck. “I don’t know how I’m going to survive until May before I can see you on a daily basis.” 

Ashlyn doesn’t answer, instead she squeezes Ali a bit tighter before releasing her grip and placing a kiss on her forehead. She’s not ready to reveal the change of plans just yet. She wants the moment to be a little more special than in a hallway of the hotel.

Ali takes a step back, sliding her arms from around Ashlyn’s neck to both her biceps. “I definitely need a better kiss than that,” she says with her head tilted to the side. None of them are much for PDA but after scanning the hallway, making sure they are alone, Ashlyn leans forward to catch Ali’s lips with her own. 

 

The next day, they have the morning off before they start with meetings during the afternoon and then an evening practice. Ashlyn decides that this will be the best time to tell Ali about the news, before everything gets crazy. She takes her out for coffee and breakfast at a café not too far away from the hotel and they spend the first hour catching up on small things that has happened since last camp. No mattar how often they text, talk on the phone, or skype, they always have endless things to talk about when they see each other. Ashlyn realizes she's about to run out of time so when there is a lull in the conversation, she clears her throat. 

”Ehm, I have something I need to tell you,” she says with a shy smile. 

”Okay…” the brunette answers a little hesitant. Those words never leads to anything good. 

As if she can see what Ali’s thinking, Ashlyn is quick to add, ”It's nothing bad, I promise. In fact, I think it’s something really good.” She’s having a hard time keeping a straight face, not wanting to give too much away by showing of the giant smile that is threatening to take over her face. 

”Okay, so why am I still waiting?” Ali retorts with a bit of sass. 

All the blonde can do is chuckling before she takes a deep breath, all of a sudden nervous. What if Ali wouldn't be as excited as she was? ”Well…I was called into a meeting with the coach a few days before flying down here and it turns out they have decided to agree on releasing me from my contract after all.”

”What?” Ali is looking at her as she has two heads, not sure what her girlfriend is implying. 

At this, Ashlyn can’t contain a straight face any longer and with a huge grin she simply says, ”I’m no longer a Duisburg player.” 

When the meaning behind the words hit Ali, her eyes becomes glossy and before she knows it, tears are falling down her cheeks. ”You’re coming home?” she whispers. 

”Yes Alex, I’m coming home,” Ashlyn says as she grabs Ali’s hand over the table and gives it a gentle squeeze. ”All my things has already been pack and shipped and I don’t have a return ticket to Germany for when this tournament is over, I have a ticket too Florida for a couple of days vacation before I’ll be joining you in DC.” 

”Oh God,” Ali gets out as she leaves her seat and walks over to Ashlyn to give her a long hug.

Ashlyn laughs into the crock of the brunettes neck before letting go so she can look her in the eyes. ”I’ll take this as you are as excited as I am?”

”Of course I am, if not more,” Ali says with her nose crinkling grin at full display. 

 

The tournament is starting out great with a 3-0 victory over Iceland and continues the same way when they beat China 5-0. Not only does Ali play all 90 minutes of this game, she also scores her first international goal and the blonde keeper couldn't be prouder. They have had their post-game pool session for recovery as well as dinner and are now laying together in Ashlyn’s bed, cuddling close together. 

”I’m so proud of you Alex,” the keeper says as she’s kissing the top of Ali’s head. 

”Thank you, it means everything,” she responds and pulls away slightly so she can look Ashlyn in the eyes. ”Knowing you were there, watching me play, made it all so much better. When I scored, all I could think about was you.” 

Tears are forming in the keepers eyes and instead of answering, she leans back in to place a soft kiss on Ali’s lips. The kiss speaks louder than any words would have done and they both just enjoy the presence of each other before Ashlyn speaks. ”Do you want to help me find an apartment in DC when we get back? I kind of need to find somewhere to live fairly quick.” 

”Of course baby, but you know that you can live with me until you find a place, right?” Ali answers. 

”Yeah, I know, and I will probably do that for a while. Don’t think I’ll find something I like in that short amount of time I have before we start pre season,” Ashlyn says with a shrug and continues, ”can’t even think about all the energy and time it will take to start looking for apartments, makes me tired.” 

”We’ll figure it out, there’s nothing you can do about it now so no point to think about it,” Ali says as she snuggles herself closer to Ashlyn. ”Let’s just enjoy being here alone for now.” 

 

Three days after their win against China, it is time for the final game of the group stage. After lunch, they all stay in the conference room the hotel provides them with to attend the pre-game meeting. Tom starts with discussing the importance of stepping out on the field and work hard, Sweden is never an easy opponent, as well as some key facts about the Swedish team before he finally reaches the bullet point everyone is waiting for, the line-up. 

“Okay ladies, the 11 players that will start today’s game are the following. Harris in goal, from right to left, Krieger, Becky, Christie, O’Hara…” it takes a moment for Ashlyn to register what she just heard but the moment she does, everything else fades away. She has no idea who else is staring; the only thing that matters is that she does. She will finally get her first senior cap. 

The meeting is luckily over after the line-up announcement and she returns to reality when she gets a few taps on the shoulder as the rest of the girls leave the room. She shakes her head and when she lifts her gaze, Ali’s standing a few feet in front of her and they are now the only two left. 

“Earth to Ash, are you there?” she teasingly says with a huge smile.

Ashlyn slowly stands up and smiles just as widely back. “Yeah I think so,” she says before closing the distance between them and wrapping the brunette in a bone crushing hug. “I’m starting,” she mumbles into the crock of Ali’s neck. 

“I know baby, and I’m so proud of you,” she leans back to lock eyes with Ashlyn who’s still smiling widely. “I hope you’ll focus on the whole field and not only to your right though, I’ve heard that the right back is pretty hot,” she continues with a wink as she give’s Ashlyn’s chest a tap before turning around and walk towards the door. 

“Wait, you’re starting too?” Ashlyn says as she tries to remember what Tom had said during the line-up presentation, failing completely. 

Ali just laughs, holding the door open for the blonde. “Yes I am, so behave,” she says as they walk out of the conference room together. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Is anyone still with me on this one? 
> 
> And again, if you're good, I'll reward you with the next chapter quite soon ;)


	18. First Cap

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's Ashlyn's first start with the full national team, and then moving in time in DC. Life should be pretty good for the pair, right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for the comments and kudos, highly appreciated! They keep me motivated. Just as promised, here is the next chapter, enjoy.

She thought she would be more nervous. Every time she has envisioned this moment throughout her life, the importance of it all had her nervous. Now, when she’s sitting here, minutes from walking on to the pitch as the starting goal keeper for the United States Women’s National Team, she's nothing but calm. As she’s slowly taping her hands, she scans the room. The people around her is family. It doesn’t matter if you’ve played 200 games for the national team, or 2, everyone plays an important role and there is no other group Ashlyn rather get her first senior cap with. Eventually, her eyes lands on Ali, who is in the middle of tying her cleats. Even in this environment, where they act completely professional, her heart skips a beat just by the sight of her girlfriend. She studies her for a moment, taking in her beauty, before going back to give her full attention to the tape around her hands, making sure it is perfect. That’s what everything she can control has to be today, perfect. 

Moments later, Tom and the rest of the coaching staff is joining the team in the locker room. They are going over some final details before breaking it down and walking out towards the field. Standing second in line, behind no one other than Captain America herself, waiting to enter the field, Ashlyn is finally feeling a bit of nerves coming over her. It’s all in a good way though, she knows she’s playing her best with some butterflies in her stomach, it makes her more focused and motivated to be at her best. 

After listening to the national anthems, they shake hands with their opponents, from which Ashlyn knows a couple of players, both from her time in the WPS, as well as Germany. It is always nice to be at these tournaments and catch up with people you've crossed path with throughout life. At this point however, it is all business and the blonde keeper cannot wait for the game to start, she couldn’t care less who is standing on the other side of the half line. 

When the referee finally blows her whistle, Ashlyn is in full game mode. The first couple of minutes are rather uneventful, both teams feeling each other out without really creating any chances. It doesn’t take long though before things picks up when Sweden gets a 1v1 chance in the 4th minute. A beautiful ball beats the U.S back line and Lotta Schelin is all of a sudden sprinting towards goal with the ball between herself and the keeper. 

Ashlyn is quick off her line and gets the ball away right inside the 18-yard box, before the Swedish forward gets there. But as she’s running back to the goal, she seen a Swedish midfielder hit the ball from 40 yards and it doesn't take long for her to realize she won’t reach it if it’s on frame and as she throws herself in the air in an attempt to prevent a goal, she sees the ball fly over her hands and into the back of the net. 

She’s disappointed, but knows she can’t blame herself. She did what she had to do, coming of her line, and then there is nothing to do when the ball is hit like that from the center circle. After this goal, the U.S team is controlling the game, hitting the posts multiple times before Alex Morgan scores with a header on a corner in the 56th minute. Despite the tough opponents, Ashlyn has a rather uneventful game in goal, only forced to make on save during 90 minutes of play and when the game is over, and the score board still reads 1-1, they have won their group and will face Germany in the final.  

 

”You were great baby,” Ali says after the game when they're finally out of sight and back in the locker room. ”There was nothing you could do about their goal.” 

Ashlyn gives her a smile before hugging her tightly. Ali always makes sure she knows she did good. ”I know I couldn’t have done anything, I got out good at the 1v1 but when someone strikes like that from 40 yards, I can’t blame my self,” she says with a smile. The truth was, she felt great. She’d got her first senior cap, they had played Sweden to a tied 1-1 game, she had done her job, and they had advanced to the final game. 

 

Later that night, they are cuddled up together in a lounge chair at the pool area. Enjoying the peace and quiet they both so desperately need. No matter how much they love their teammates, they needs their own time, when it’s just the two of them and they can be themselves, talking about anything but soccer. It is at times like this they talk about their dreams, families, future and anything else under the sun. Other times, like now, they are mostly silent, enjoying the moment they have together. 

”I’ve been thinking about something,” Ali says all of a sudden, letting go of the blonde to look her in the eyes and before she has a chance to reply, she continues. ”Do you really need to look for an apartment when we get back to DC?”

”Ehm…I mean yeah, it would be quite nice to have somewhere to live as soon as possible, you know,” Ashlyn says, a bit confused, not knowing what Ali wants to do that is more important than finding her a place to live. 

”No but I mean, is it really necessary, I already have an apartment,” the brunette says shyly as she looks down on her hands. ”I don’t know, I just thought it would be a bit stupid for you to get your own place and pay rent when I already have a perfectly fine place.” This is something Ali has been thinking about a lot since she signed the lease for the apartment she’ll be moving into when they get back to DC. But especially since they had the conversation about apartments a few days ago. She had also taken Ashlyn’s input on the different apartments she was looking at into consideration, already thinking that there might be a chance they could move in together eventually. The timeframe had changed a bit but Ali was not one to complain about Ashlyn moving back home roughly 3 months earlier than planned.  

When Ashlyn realizes what she's being asked, her confused expression turns into a smirk. ”Alexandra, are you asking me to move in with you?” she says teasingly as she's poking Ali gently in the ribs, trying to get her to look up.

”Yeah, maybe…I don't know,” she says even more shyly. She then takes a deep breath and looks up, her confidence seems to return. She’s locking eyes with the blonde as her lips turn into a small smile. ”No wait, I am. I definitely am asking you to move in with me.”

”Well then, what else can I do than say yes. Those eyes and that smile already have me whipped,” Ashlyn says with a huge grin, leaning in to capture Ali’s lips in a kiss. 

”Really?” Ali says, showing of a grin on her own, when they break apart.  

”Yes really, I’d love to move in with you Alex, if that is something you are ready for,” Ashlyn answers, the last part a bit more serious. 

”I really think I’m ready for this. It feels like it is the next step for us, and now when we finally are at the same place at the same time, why waste more time than necessary? And honestly, even if we had our own apartments, how many nights do you think we’d spend apart?” the brunette says, poking her tongue between her teeth as she gives Ashlyn her nose crinkling smile.

The blonde just looks at her, there is nothing she finds as adorable as a smiling Ali, especially not when she does it with her entire face just like now. ”Well, then I’d say it’s a done deal. We are moving in together.” 

 

”Ashlyn, I swear to God…” Ali raises her voice and gives the blonde a stern look before turning around. She walks back into the bedroom where she’s trying to unpack all of their clothes, something that Ashlyn should help with. Instead she’s laying on the couch, watching a UNC basketball game. 

Ali had moved in to the apartment a few days earlier, with a lot of help from her dad and his family. Then Ashlyn arrived two days ago and they had manage to get most of her things organized the day before. Now it’s mostly small things left, like unpacking boxes and suitcases, but Ali is going completely crazy. 

Ashlyn is having what the brunette likes to refer to as a bad week. Meaning, her depression is taking over. Instead of being her normal happy and carefree self, she’s struggling to even get out of bed. Ali knows she can’t be mad at the blonde but the whole situation with them moving in and their first pre season with the Spirit just around the corner, she’s having a hard time staying afloat herself. 

Already regretting the voice she used when speaking to Ashlyn, she walks back into the living room where the blonde is laying. When she takes the time to watch her a bit more closely, she realizes that she’s not even paying attention to the game. She’s just laying there, staring out in nowhere. 

”Baby,” she says gently as she sits down on the couch next to Ashlyn’s head. When she don’t get even the smallest sign that the blonde heard her, she puts a hand on her arm, squeezing lightly. ”Ash, I need you to talk to me,” she says with a bit more concern in her voice. 

At this, Ashlyn finally look up, but she does it with tears in her eyes. ”I don’t know what’s wrong with me,” she whispers weakly. ”This should be fun and exciting, but it’s not, and I'm so sorry for always being a disappointment,” she continues as she push herself up to a sitting position next to Ali. She hides her face in her hands as the tears continues to roll down her cheeks. 

This completely breaks Ali’s heart, seeing her love like this, knowing there is not much she can do to help her. ”Ash, look at me please,” she pleads, trying to get her attention but failing. ”Ash,” she says again. ”You are never, and I repeat, NEVER a disappointment. It is okay to not always be on top. It is okay to be down and feel sad, and when you do, I’m here right next to you no matter what. We are in this together, and I love you even on your worst days.” 

Instead of answering, Ashlyn just leans into Ali’s side letting go of all her emotion, sobbing heavily into the crock of the brunette’s neck. Ali wraps her arms around the broken woman, hugging her tightly and whispering that everything is going to be okay and that she’s right there. 

Ashlyn eventually calm down but they continue to sit there for half an hour, non of them ready to let go just yet. The blonde is the one who finally breaks away from the embrace, wiping her face before looking up at Ali. ”I’m sorry…” she starts but is quickly cut off. 

”No stop, you have nothing to apologize for. I told you, and I will tell you over and over again, I love you just as much today as any other day. You feeling down will never be a disappointment for me. I know how hard you are fighting this Ash, and no one is as proud as I am. But it is okay to feel, it is okay to be vulnerable. I’m sorry for raising my voice earlier, I’m just tired and this whole moving thing is a but tough, but don’t ever think that I’m blaming you.” 

Ashlyn can’t believe how lucky she is, not only for having Ali in her life, but having her in her own corner. She looks at the brunette and sees nothing but love, she sees someone that will always be there for her, someone that loves her on her good days as well as her bad. ”Thank you, thank you for loving me,” she says simply, knowing Ali will understand the deeper meaning behind the words. 

Coming back from Florida, going straight to the first practice with the Spirit, and then on top of that moving in, Ashlyn had had a stressful couple of days. The fact that their roster didn't look too exciting didn’t help either. It hadn’t taken even a full practice for the both national team players to realize that even though they had a handful of solid players, Lori Lindsay and the Canadian national team player Diana Matheson especially, they would be struggling. The remaining part of the roster were mostly young players that had very limited experience on this level. Ashlyn had for the past 2 days been screaming her lungs out during practice, trying to organize the so called backline she had in front of her. Now, she just felt overwhelmed, it had been hard getting out of bed already in the morning, but after practice she completely crashed, and she was not, either physically or mentally able to leave the couch and help Ali even if she registered that she should, not until Ali came and talked to her. 

The blonde takes a deep breath before offering Ali a small smile. ”I guess those clothes won’t unpack themselves, huh?” she says as she stands up. ”Should we?” she continues as she’s holding her hand out for Ali to take, leading her in to the bedroom to help her. 

An hour later they have finished the unpacking, the suitcases are put away and they are both starving. They are in desperate need to fill up the fridge, even though they are provided both breakfast and lunch by the Spirit, they can’t live off of take out during the evenings, none of their coaches would be very supportive of that. So despite the tiredness they are both feeling from practice as well as their emotional afternoon, they jump in the car to go grocery shopping. 

 

The couple is not given much time to settle down in the new apartment before they are of on national duties again, this time the games are played in Germany respective the Netherlands. After a tied game against the Germans, Ashlyn learns that she will get the start again against the Netherlands, and this time, she is actually a bit nervous already from the beginning. She still isn’t at her best, even though it is better than the first couple of days back in DC. Being around her teammates helps, several of them are aware of her struggles, and she suspects that Ali has been talking to some of them, giving them a heads up that she might be a bit sensitive and in more need of a supporting shoulder then usually. 

After they get the starting lineup, Whitney walks up to her. ”You’re going to do great,” she says with a reassuring smile, like she can read the keepers mind. ”Everyone in here believes in you, especially Ali, don't push her away” she continues as she nods her head in the direction where the brunette is standing, in a conversation with HAO, but clearly keeping an eye on Ashlyn at the same time. 

”I’m not,” Ashlyn says confused. ”What has she told you?” The blonde is getting a little but upset that Ali is clearly talking about their relationship with others, even if it is just Whitney. 

”Calm down, she only told me you had a couple of rough days, that you are doing better. But she wanted me to look out for you, and Ash, I’ve known you for a while now. I know how you work and I know that your first instinct is to push people away when you are having a bad time. I just don’t want you to do that to Ali, she’s worried about you, but she loves you endlessly.” 

Ashlyn sighs as she’s looking over to Ali, her and HAO now the only two ones left in the room except for herself and Whitney. ”Sometimes, I really hate that you know me so well,” she says with another sigh. ”But you are right, I do tend to push people away, but believe me when I say that I am trying really hard to let Ali in, to not be afraid to show her every side of me. Even the darkest ones.” 

”I know you are, and I’m so proud of you. Imagine if your freshman-self would see where you are now, I bet she would be quite proud and impressed too, huh?” Whitney says with a chuckle, trying to lighten the mood.

”Yeah, I guess you are right,” the blonde answers with a chuckle herself. ”Thanks for the pep talk Whit, you always know what I need,” she continues as she gives the defender a hug. 

”Hey, that’s what best friends are for.” 

 

The moment Ashlyn steps into the locker room after the warmup, she’s in complete game mode. Some of the players are blasting music, dancing around, fixing each others hair, or just hanging around. The blonde however, puts her own head phones on and disappears into her own world. Getting dressed into the game gear after a certain pattern, right before left, and slowly and methodically taping her hands, like her life depends on the perfectness of the ritual. She finishing up with walking over to Ali, who helps her with the gloves, and then she’s ready, ready to represent her country. For the second time in her life, she will walk out on the field as the starting goal keeper for the best national team in the world. With that thought in her head, she let’s go of all the bad thoughts. For the next couple of hours, everything is about soccer, and she is good enough. She is finally good enough. 

The game, just as Ashlyn’s previous one against Sweden, is fairly uneventful for the keeper. They win 3-1 and except for the goal they let the Netherlands score, Ashlyn only has to do one save.  The most interesting thing during the game was probably when she almost got kicked in the head by the brunette 

After a week and a half in Europe with the national team, the both Spirit players are back in DC, only 3 days before the first ever NWSL season kicks off and the team travels to Boston to play the Breakers. It is draining, traveling all over the country, and sometimes the world, at the same time as they are supposed to get a completely new, and very inexperienced team to connect both on and off the field. The evening before game day, Ashlyn and Ali are sitting outside of the hotel they are staying at with the team. 

”God I’m tired,” Ali says as she’s leaning into the side of the blonde. ”I could never have imagined that it would be this exhausting to get the newbies to do what they need to do.”

”Tell me about it. The season hasn't even started and I’m already tired of calling out the most simple instructions, things that should be obvious for every player that has come this far,” Ashlyn sighs. Her job as a goal keeper makes her the eyes of the whole team, she can see everything in front of her, and being the vocal player she is, she’s more often than not barking out instructions to the young defenders in the back line. Unfortunately, more often than not, they do not do what she tells them to do, forcing her to make one acrobatically save after the other. Something that could be avoided if they only knew which is their left shoulder, and which is their right. 

”I know, believe me I’m really trying to help with the organization as much as I can. But it’s only so much I can do. If they can’t follow your instructions, they won’t follow mine,” Ali says with a shrug. ”And you are doing a great job, I imagine that you will be the key that keeps us in more than one game throughout the season.” 

”I think you are right, unfortunately,” Ashlyn says with a laugh. ”I can’t save you guys asses every time.” 

”Eeey, don’t say that. You love my as,” the brunette retorts with a smirk, and a wink.

This makes Ashlyn laugh even harder. ”I certainly do, but don’t give me any ideas here and now where I can’t do anything about them,” she simply says. 

Ali just pouts before leaning in, giving the keeper a quick kiss before standing up. ”Come on stud, we have curfew in 10 minutes, you better get _your_ pretty ass inside before that.” 

 

The game is a tough one, the Spirit is taking the lead early in the first half, but after several huge saves from the blonde, she has to see herself defeated in the 91st minute, and the game ends with a 1-1 tie. Ashlyn is disappointed to no end. They had done a fairly good job, taking Sydney Leroux out of the game, and when she had been given the chance, Ashlyn had been there to stop her up until what basically was the last kick of the game. She can’t be angry on her teammates, even though they could have done a better job throughout the game, not leaving her hanging time after time. Unfortunately, the one she's taking out her anger on is Ali. When they finally arrive home to the apartment, it’s well past midnight, and Ashlyn is throwing her bag in a corner as soon as she’s through the door, and then walks of towards the bedroom. A behavior Ali’s not having, not tonight. 

”You stop right there and you better come back and pick your shit up before I say it again,” she says in a stern voice. ”I’m just as disappointed as you are, but I don't behave like a three-year old. To the brunette’s surprise, Ashlyn stops dead in her track, and she actually feels a bit proud that she has that kind of power over the blonde. That is, until she sees the look in her eyes. 

”You don’t tell me what to do,” she gets out between her teeth. ”And don’t come here and say you know how I feel, or that you are just as disappointed. You’re not the one standing in goal, being the last person to save our asses when everyone fucks up all the fucking time.” 

Ali looks at her, eyes wide and mouth slightly open, not knowing how to respond. She knew the blonde was angry, but not like this and she definitely didn't expect her to lash out on her like this. ”Excuse me?” is everything she gets out.

”You heard me,” Ashlyn simple says. ”Maybe, if you could get that backline of yours to work a bit better together, I wouldn't have to kill myself to save shot after shot all night long. It’s only so much I can do when you apparently can’t do your job.” 

Ali doesn’t know who the person standing in front of her is, at least it can’t be Ashlyn, she’d never say things like that, no matter how disappointed she is. ”Well, I’m sorry that I’m not living up to your standards, maybe you should have stayed in Germany after all,” at this point,  she’s just as furious as Ashlyn, and she can’t keep her emotions in check. To not say something else she’ll regret, she picks up her back and walks past the blonde, but not without adding one last thing. ”I swear to god, if you don't take care of your shit before going to bed…” and with that she slams the door to their bathroom shut. 

 

Usually, when they go to bed, Ali’s snuggled up close to the blonde within second, non of them able to fall asleep without the other close. Not tonight though, instead Ali lays down on her side, with her back toward Ashlyn. 

”I’m sorry Alex,” the blonde whispers quietly after a few minutes. She’s still just as disappointed, but she can’t take the distance that’s currently between them. She will never be able to fall asleep if Ali is not cuddled up close to her, as well as mad at her. 

At first, she thinks she has already fallen asleep but eventually the brunette lets out a sigh and turns around to face Ashlyn. ”I’m sorry too, but that doesn’t mean I completely forgive you for yelling at me, and saying all those things. I am just as disappointed as you are, just because you're the one in goal doesn't mean it’s only your fault when we get scored on.” 

”I know, and you know I don't mean it. I was angry and I wasn’t thinking about what I was saying,” Ashlyn says quietly, just wanting Ali to forgive her for her stupid mouth so they can cuddle up and fall asleep.

Like she can read her thoughts, Ali sighs again before she scoots closer to the blonde, giving her a light push to lay on her back so she can put her head on her chest. ”I know, let’s just forget this for now, but try to remember next time you feel like that that everything will be better, and definitely easier, if you just talk to me instead of yelling.”

”I promise,” Ashlyn says as she’s wrapping her arms around Ali. ”Good night princess, I love you.” 

”I love you too,” Ali responds, voice already heavy with sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Keep em coming guys, I'm over here writing and need some love :)


	19. You're Too Good

Five games, and a whole month into the seasons, and the Spirit has still to win a game. After three tied games, and two losses, they are now on their way to the West coast to play the Reigns in Seattle. To say the team, and Ashlyn and Ali especially, is frustrated is an understatement. All games up until this point has been tight and tough and when they’ve lost, it has only been with a lone goal. A fact that almost makes it even more frustrating. It would have been one thing if they were completely out played by their opponents, but they’re not.

The more experienced players are doing everything in their power to turn the ship around, they’ve had meeting after meeting in an attempt to get the whole team on the same page but up until now, nothing seems to help. They are just not there. 

”Ladies, this is it. Today we have to make a change. I see you out there everyday, working hard during practice. I believe in you as individuals, and I believe in you as a team. Today is the day to show what a great group of players you are. I have faith in you,” head coach Mike Jorden is standing i front of the team in the locker room, kick off only minutes away against the Reigns, and he is trying to wake the team up in his one way. 

Ashlyn gives Ali a look from across the room, none of them really pleasant with the coach’s way to do things. They had both been hoping for a more professional environment in the club, but Jorden is not living up to their expectations, he is much for talking but nothing productive is really happening. 

”Yes ladies, let’s get out there and show them what a hard working team we are. Nothing will come easy though, so I expect everyone in here to work on top of their abilities. Just because you’ve come this far, making a pro team, doesn't mean you've won anything. We’re in the bottom of the league, we have not won a game yet, none of you in here has proved that you deserve to be on this team up to this point so let’s get out there and kick the Reigns ass so to speak,” Lori Lindsay, the captain of the team, as well as fellow USWNT player, gives them both a smirk after trying to get the team going in her own way. Speaking some words of truth instead of the crap Jorden keeps repeating, they all know he believes in them, but that hasn’t given them any success yet. 

 

When the game is over, Ashlyn looks over to the score board and even though she’s been playing the game, she’s having a hard time believing the numbers up there are real. They’ve won, they have finally taken three point by beating Seattle 2-4. Never have the blonde felt such a relief from winning a game. She’s not sure what would have happened if they hadn't won this one, what she would have done on tomorrows practice. 

”We did it,” Ali says as she’s walking up to Ashlyn on the field. They give each other a brief hug, like one they’d give to any other team mate, before walking together to shake hands with tear opponents, and in many cases, friends. 

”We sure did,” the blonde replies with a grin. ”I had start losing faith to b honest,” she continues with a chuckle as they reach Solo and Pinoe in the imd circle. 

”Great game both of you,” the short haired blonde says. ”It was a tough one.” 

”It really was,” Ali says before they are interrupted by a few other players from both teams, eager to shake hands with the pros, a fact both Ashlyn and Ali has had a hard time to adjust to. They are all players in the same league, just because US Soccer pays for their salary, and they are a part of the national team, doesn't mean they should be worshiped by the younger college drafted players. 

After talking a bit more with the fellow national team players, they get together as a team with Coach Jorden saying a few words about the game. They are all, for obvious reasons, happy. But they also know that nothing really have changed, they just got a little bit more room to breath for the moment, until the next game where they have to prove themselves again. One win is not good enough. 

Unfortunately, the following month and a half does not become what the Spirit was hoping for, nothing changed with the win against the Reign and they were quickly back to losing again. Due to injuries and national team camps, both Ashlyn and Ali, as well as others, are missing out on several games but after losing for the fifth game in a row, and not scoring a single goal since the win in Seattle, Mike Jorden is fired and Mark Parson is taking over. I change that is very much welcomed among the Spirit players. The blonde had even made a not so subtile comment in an interview about her feelings for the coaching situation, saying it might be time for a change. 

 

It’s now mid July and even though no one expected the new coach to work magic, they keep losing. The difference is that they are working better as a team, both on and off the field but the pressure hasn’t changed, especially not for the allocated players and it’s staring to take a toll on both Ali and Ashlyn.

When Ali enters the apartment after a trip to the grocery store one afternoon after practice, the first thing she sees is Ashlyn pacing the living room, talking on the phone, there eyes meets across the room and Ashlyn gives her a dimple smile and holds up a finger, saying it will only be a minute. 

”Yes I know, she actually just got home. I’ll talk to her and call you back tomorrow,” she hears the blonde say to whoever is on the other end of the line. ”Perfect, thank you so much. Bye.” 

”Who was that?” Ali asks as she takes of her shoes and jacket. 

Ashlyn picks up the grocery bags the brunette just put down and starts carrying them to the kitchen. ”My agent.” 

”Oh,” is everything Ali gets out, her mind starts running a thousand miles a minute. 

”Can you come here?” Ashlyn says from the kitchen with a chuckle, and Ali realizes she stopped dead in her tracks. 

”What did he want?” she asks cautiously, not sure she wants to hear the answer. She’s well aware of the fact that Ashlyn could play on a much better team than the Spirit, heck she SHOULD play on a better team. 

The blonde is looking at her when she walks around the corner to their kitchen area, biting here lip nervously. ”Alex,” she says with a sigh. ”Why are you looking like that?” 

Ali stops once again, tears welling up in her eyes. ”I just don't want you to move away from me,” she says quietly and before the last word leave her lips, Ashlyn has her wrapped up in her arms. 

”Babe, I haven’t even told you what he called about,” she says into the shorter woman’s hair as she’s holding her. 

”I know, but you are too good to play here, every team should want you so why wouldn't you get an offer from somewhere else?” Ali gets out between sobs. She’s been holding in the past months stress and frustration but with this, she can’t hold it back anymore. She’s exhausted and the lone thought of not having Ashlyn here to battle this together with has her crumbling. 

”Ali, look at me,” the blonde says as she lets her go, gripping her arms to hold her steady in front of her instead. ”Look at me,” she says again and this time, Ali meets her eyes. ”Can I tell you what he said?” she asks and continues when she gets a nod from the brunette. ”I have an offer, but it’s just a short term loan from the time our season ends until November.” 

Ali closes her eyes, relived that it’s not another team within the NWSL that wants to get Ashlyn through a trade, but it also means that this team most likely plays in Europe, or even worse, Australia. Even on a loan, that would break Ali. ”Germany?” she asks. 

”No Sweden, Tyresö FF, they are currently leading the league and will play in the Champions League during the fall. It’s where Press and Kling plays, and Sara as well,” Ashlyn explains, referring to their teammates from the national team as well as Sara Thunebro, one of their friends from Ali’s time in Frankfurt. 

”You’re moving to Sweden?” the brunette says and tears starts falling again. 

Ashlyn looks at her with pain in her eyes. She thought this conversation was going to be hard, but not like this. ”I haven’t accepted it yet, you know I wouldn’t do that without talking to you. I think this is a really great chance for me, but if you don’t want me to go, I won’t.” 

Ali sighs and wipes her tears away. ”Of course you have to take to offer, I could never live with myself if you say no and stay here because of me,” she says with a shrug. ”But I’m going to miss you.” 

”Alex listen to me. Do I want to go? Yes. Are you more important then any offer out there? Definitely,” the blonde cups her face and gives her a kiss. ”I’m serious when I say that I’ll stay here if you want me to.”

Ali chuckles. ”I know you are, but I’m serious as well. There is no chance you will say no to this, if you think the offer is good enough. It’s going to suck, having you on the other side of the world, but you have never been anything but supportive when it comes to me following my dreams. If you want to do this, I’m your biggest supporter, and I’m sorry for that breakdown, I'm just so tired,” she says with a sad smile. ”This season has been much harder than I ever envisioned it to be.”

”First of all, the offer is definitely good enough so to speak. It’s really good,” Ashlyn starts with a smirk. ”And you don’t have to apologize, I know it has been a lot lately and I know you are exhausted. I am as well and to be honest, I wasn't thrilled when he said he wanted to discuss an offer with me. I actually told him I wasn’t interested before he even said what it was all about,” she chuckles as she pulls the shorter woman in for another hug. ”But when he explained it, I felt like this could be something for me you know. I think it would help me to play for a top club in Europe, and to experience Champions League as well.”

Ali smiles in the crock of Ashlyn’s neck, knowing she’s right in everything she says. This opportunity will definitely help her as a keeper, and now, when she’s calmed down, she mostly just feels proud over the fact that a top club like Tyresö wants Ashlyn. ”Tomorrow morning, you’ll call and tell them you accept the offer, no further discussions needed,” she says, giving Ashlyn a kiss, that quickly gets deeper. 

They stand there, in the middle of the kitchen, groceries long forgotten, and make out for what feels like forever. Eventually, Ashlyn is lifting Ali up, placing her on her hips as she begins to walk them toward the bedroom. Once there, she lays the brunette down on the bed and follow suite, hovering over her for a second before catching her lips with her own again. The make out session continues until Ashlyn breaks away, moving her lips to Ali’s neck, trailing kisses up and down until she settles for her pulse point, biting down lightly before soothing with kisses. Ali moans under her, tugging at the hem of her shirt, wanting to feel the skin underneath. Ashlyn obeys and sits up to pull the shirt over her head, as she’s doing it, Ali gets rid of her own and soon they are back together, skin against skin. 

In a well practiced movement, Ashlyn takes the brunette’s bra of, quickly capturing one of her nipples in her mouth as soon as it’s free. Ali moans again, moving one hand to the back of Ashlyn’s head to let her know she wants her to continue what she’s going. 

”Oh god Ash, yes…” 

Ashlyn takes care of both breasts, switching between tugging on the nipples with her mouth and caressing them softly with her hands. The brunette is squirming underneath her, and she absolutely loves to have this power over her. She loves she fact that she is what makes Ali feel like this, that she is the only person that are allowed to see her most vulnerable side. 

She continues down Ali’s body, tracing the script covering her ribs with her tongue, a pattern she know by heart. She reaches the brunette’s hip bone and bites down lightly, making Ali’s back arch from the bed. 

”Please Ash, I need you,” she mumbles. ”I…I need you.”

”What do you want me to do?” the blonde asks, the challenge evident in her voice. She wants to hear Ali say it. 

”I want yo…oh god, yes,” Ali stumbles over the words as the blonde starts working on her jeans, brushing her hand where Ali wants her the most as she unzips them. She’s trying to focus, but Ashlyn is everywhere, not only physically. The blonde is taking over every part of her, her body belongs to her, so does her mind and her soul. 

As she’s pulling the pants down her legs, Ashlyn places kisses along her muscles, biting down here and there. When they are finally off, she stands up for a second, getting rid of her own pants. With both of them in only underwear, Ashlyn move back up the brunette’s body, attacking her lips as her hands are traveling on their own accord over Ali. ”Tell me what you want me to do babe,” she whispers in her ear as she’s kissing her neck. 

The brunette can’t take it any longer, she desperately need Ashlyn to touch her and she knows she won’t do it until she tells her what to do. She takes a deep breath and gather all strength she has. ”I want you to fuck me,” she gets out and as soon as the last word leaves her lips, the blonde’s hand is moving her thong to the side, and her fingers are slowly sliding through her folds. 

”Like this?” Ashlyn husks out. 

”Mm…more please.”

Ashlyn obeys and slides one finger inside Ali, who buckles her hips immediately. The blonde has to move her other hand to her hip to hold her still as she’s sliding her finger in and out, in a slow but steady rhythm. Before the brunette can ask about it, Ashlyn ads a second finger, making Ali moan louder. After a while, she has her girlfriend squirming underneath her and she knows her orgasm is approaching quickly based on her heavy breathing, panting and lack of words. She slows down, pulling her fingers out, an action that has Ali staring at her in disbelief once she opens her eyes.

”Ashlyn Michelle Harris,” she gets out through heavy breathing. ”I’m so close, and I swear to god, if you don’t put your fingers back down there and continue to fuck me…” she’s almost getting mad, her orgasm so close but yet so far away.

Ashlyn is just smirking at her. ”As you wish princess,” she says, but without making an effort of putting her fingers back where Ali wants them. Instead she starts trailing kisses down her body, starting with her lips before moving down her neck, over her collarbone, down her breast and abs until she reaches her hipbones where she's slowly licking from one side to the other, just above the brunette’s thong.  With her teeth, she slowly drags the tiny piece of clothing down the brunette’s legs before moving back up to positioning herself comfortably. She takes both legs and placing them over her shoulders. As she’s leaning in, she look up at Ali who has her eyes closed and head thrown back.

”Alex,” she says softly without getting a reaction from the brunette. ”Alex look at me,” she tries again, this time a bit louder and Ali slowly opens her eyes. They are dark with desire and lust, slightly unfocused, and Ashlyn just stares into them for a heartbeat before leaning in, finally letting her tongue slide through the soaking wet folds in front of her. The second she does, Ali breaks their eye contact and throws her head back again, a loud moan leaving her throat. 

The blonde takes Ali’s clit in her mouth, sucking on it lightly before starting to flick it with her tongue and within second, Ali is exploding.

”Fuck Ask…fuuuuck,” the brunette moans loudly as the orgasm is taking over her body. 

 

The following day, the blonde calls her agent back, letting him know she’ll accept the offer and after that, the rest is quickly solved with her signing the contract a few days later. The move is then announced by the Swedish club and she makes a few comments about it, stating she is completely focused on finishing the NWSL season strong with the Spirit before heading overseas to help the Swedish club as much as possible, both with the end of the Swedish Damallsvenskan as well as in Champions League. 

Before any of this is happening, it is Ali’s 29th birthday and the blonde has been planning a surprise for months. Two day before her actual birthday, Ashlyn lies to Ali and says she has a goal keeper practice. Something the brunette thinks is a bit odd, but knowing Ashlyn, and their coaches, it could be possible. 

But instead of going out to the soccer fields, the blonde drives to the airport to pick up her surprise. She’s standing and watching all the people coming form the baggage claim when she feels two strong hands cover her eyes. 

”Isn’t it my sister from another mister,” Kyle says as he lets Ashlyn turn around and give him a hug. The two of them has become close over the years, feeling like siblings at this point.

”I’m so glad to see you,” the blonde says into she shoulder of the taller man. She is overwhelmed with emotions as they are standing there, knowing how much this surprise will mean for Ali. 

Kyle understands where she's coming from, feeling a bit emotional himself. ”I’m glad too be here, thank you so much for doing this for her.” 

Ashlyn laughs as she lets go of him. ”I’m not doing much, you're the one flying across the country to celebrate with us.” 

”I wouldn't miss it.” 

 

When they arrive back at the apartment, Ashlyn lets Kyle walk in first, surprising Ali in the kitchen. She stays back to begin with, giving the siblings some time alone but she can hear the moment Ali turns around and sees who’s there. 

”KYYYYYYLE,” the brunette screams and all the blonde can do is smile. She knew this was something her girlfriend needed desperately. Even if she didn’t know it herself. 

When Ashlyn finally walks in to the kitchen, the first thing Ali does is throwing herself around Ashlyn’s neck. ”Thank you, thank you, thank you,” she whispers into the crock of the blonde’s neck. ”I can’t believe you did this,” she continues as she lets go. ”Best birthday gift ever.” 

”Oh good, then I don’t have to give you what I’ve bought for you actual birthday then,” Ashlyn says, knowing how much Ali loves present. 

This is met with the brunette’s signature pout. ”Eey, I didn’t say that.” 

”I’m just kidding princess, you’ll get your birthday presents, I promise.” 

Kyle rolls his eyes behind Ali’s back, well aware of how much of a princess his sister can be. 

 

The following day is game day, but before it’s time for them to head out to the stadium, Kyle take the two of them out for brunch. Ashlyn tried to get out of it at first, wanting to give the siblings some much needed time alone but none of them were having it. She was coming with them or they were all eating at home. As much as they love and miss each other, she’s just as important to the both of them and Kyle misses her just as much as he misses Ali. 

”So, I’ve heard about this Sweden thing,” he looks over at Ashlyn a bit cautious as he speaks, not wanting to stir any feeling for the both women in front of him. 

Ashlyn hasn’t been speaking to him personally about it, but she knows Ali has and she’s fairly sure he got the whole story from her, tears and everything. ”Yeah, the plan is for me to leave the day after or season ends, so in less than a month,” she says, looking over to Ali to make sure everything is fine. They have been talking a lot about this, and the blonde knows she has Ali’s support but she also knows it will be hard on the brunette, for everyday leading up to her flight, it will get harder. 

Ali gives her a smile and puts a hand on her thigh under the table, squeezing lightly. ”I’m so proud of you,” she says. ”Even though it will suck having you so far away,”  she looks back over to Kyle and her eyes light up with a realization. ”Having three months off, being here all along, I will have to make at least a couple of trips to the West coast to see my niece.”

”You sure have to,” he respond, happy to see they’ve worked everything out. 

The rest of the brunch is filled with catching up, laughter, and stories from the siblings childhood. Eventually, it’s time for the soccer players to get going, they have a game to get ready for.   

 

Per usual, they lose and this time it’s against the Breakers. But at this point, Ali couldn’t care less. She’s tired of it and today, when having her brother in town, she just wants to forget about soccer, the team, the loss, and everything else and go out dancing. Which is exactly what they do and when they get back home, well past midnight, Ali is a bit tipsy, but not drunk. She’s been careful all night, because _who wants to wake up on their birthday, the most important day of the year, hungover?!_ Not this princess. 

”Thank you for giving me the best birthday weekend,” she says to Ashlyn once they are in bed. ”I absolutely love having Kyle here and I think that was exactly what I needed. 

”Your welcome, and you know I’d do anything for you. I’m sorry we couldn't win for you as well,” the blonde replies. 

”Honestly, I couldn't care less. We already know we most likely will end up in last place, and I just want the season to be over already, to start focus for next year,” Ali says with a sigh before turning to face her girlfriend. ”I can’t believe it’s my birthday tomorrow,” she says with a grin. ”I love my birthday.”

”Oh princess, believe me I already know that. That’s why I’ve had this weekend planned for a while.” 

”And you still won’t tell me what we’re doing tomorrow?” Ali pouts, not satisfied with not knowing what is going on, especially since everyone else probably know. 

”No I won’t, but it will be a long, fun, and exciting day so we better get some sleep,” the blonde says as she gives Ali a kiss and pulls her closer. 

 

The next morning they are waking up to Kyle bursting through their bedroom door bright and early. ”Good morning love birds, and HAPPY BIRTHDAY ALEX,” he shouts as he throws himself on the bed. 

”Uuugh…” Ashlyn gets out, still half asleep. ”What…uugh…ahh that hurts,” she continues as Kyle sits up on her legs. 

”Sorry not sorry,” Kyle offers her as he tries to wiggle himself in between the two still not fully awake women. After a but of work, he gets under the covers and sighs happily.

”You know we could have been naked, right?” Ali says with a teasing smirk as she leans in to rest her head on her brothers chest, giving him a side hug at the same time.

”Eeew, don't say that. But I know I took a chance, and luckily it all worked out in my favor because look at us, here I am, laying in between my two favorite persons. Like on big, and very gay, happy family.” 

Both women laugh at him, they love him too much to be angry. 

”No matter how much I enjoy this love party, we need to start moving. We should get company quite soon,” he says as he looks at his phone to see what time it is. ”In fact, really soon, so come on ladies, time to leave bed and start the real birthday party.” 

They all leave bed, starting to get ready, and it is not 10 minutes later when the door bell rings. ”Ali, you should get that,” Ashlyn says from the bathroom. 

Ali does as she says and goes to open the door. When she sees who's standing on the other side she lets out a scream and both Ashlyn and Kyle chuckles, happy to make their girl happy. 

”Carm, what are you doing here?” the brunette says as she throws herself at the woman standing in her doorway, hugging her tightly. 

”Well, I heard someone is celebrating her birthday todays, so I thought I might join the party,” the Canadian, and Penn State Alumni, says slyly. ”Happy Birthday Kriegs, 29 look good on you,” she continues as she holds the brunette an arm length away to look her up and down. 

”Aaw, thank you. And thank you for coming here, it means a lot. Even though I still don't know what we are going to do,” she says with a pout, making the Canadian laugh. 

”So they still haven't told you, huh?” she smirks. ”They are good, I'm impressed.” 

 

Half an hour later, they are all set and ready to go. Kyle promise them breakfast on their way so they stop for coffee and cupcakes, not exactly what a professional soccer player should eat, but as Ali put it, _I’m only turning 29 once._

After an hour in the car, they are pulling up outside of River Riders where a group of people are already waiting for them. Ali, who hates surprises, figured out where they were going halfway through the car ride. Her requested outfit along with the direction they were going gave it away and to say she was excited when realizing she’d spend her birthday tubing was an understatement. 

”This is going to be so awesome,” she says as Ashlyn parks the Jeep, still unaware of all the people waiting for them. 

As they get out of the car, Ali continues talking about how amazing this trip is, how much fun they are going to have, and how glad she is that Kyle and Carm is there as well. All of a sudden, she stops dead in her tracks, staring at the group of people standing and watching them.

”Wh…what…what is this?” she stutters, looking at Ashlyn who’s just smiling. ”Why are they here?” 

”For being so smart, you’re really stupid sometimes babe,” the blonde says as she’s laughing. ”They are here to celebrate you, as you said earlier, you're only turning 29 once, so we though we better celebrate it as you should be celebrated.” 

With tears in her eyes, Ali hugs her tightly. 

”Everyone here loves you Alex, they are all here because you mean something to them, you have an impact on their life and they want to be here to celebrate with you,” Ashlyn whispers. 

”Thank you for treating me like a princess, for always making sure I know how loved I am,” Ali mumbles back, giving Ashlyn one last squeeze before running over to all of her friends that are waiting for the birthday girl. 

The group is spending most part of the day river tubing, having a great time and celebrating Ali. When the evening comes, they all go out for dinner before hitting the dance floor. Ali, who took it easy the night before, decides she’s allowed to let loose and enjoy the evening. 

After a couple of drinks, she’s more than tipsy, which leads to her being a bit more handsy than normal. When they decide to call it a night, neither woman can get home fast enough to still their desire for one another and the next several hours are spent between the sheets; giving each other pleasure over and over again. 

 

”I can’t thank you enough for this weekend. It has been amazing,” Ali says as she’s resting her head on the blonde’s chest, slowly tracing the flowers covering her ribs. 

”You don’t have to thank me, I’ve had an amazing weekend as well and you definitely deserve this, and much more.” 

”To me it was perfect, just because of you,” Ali mumbles, voice heavy with sleep. ”I can’t believe you won’t be here in a month,” she continues. 

”Don’t think about that Alex, lets enjoy this time we have to spend together. There is nothing I love more than fall asleep and wake up next to you. You are my perfect, always and forever, good night babe.” 

Ali doesn’t answer, she’s already sound asleep, holding the blonde’s arm in a tight grip. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you are reading this, it probably means you read the whole chapter, something I am very grateful for. Despite being gone for months, I hope someone will still read and enjoy this story.


	20. The Call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I strongly feel like I am just apologizing for being gone for months in between chapters, and I really am sorry. Therefore I have made a decision. I have tried to keep the chapters around 5000 words up to this point, which I feel is not realistic right now, so I will shorten the chapters some, but try to start writing again with hopefully more motivation and end up posting more frequently instead. 
> 
> If you are still with me on this ride, I am so thankful and would love for you to drop a comment and let me know what you think.

One night, they are laying naked in bed, all tangled up in each other, and Ashlyn has been quiet for quite a while. 

”What are you thinking about,” Ali says, giving her girlfriend’s arm a squeeze. 

”Huh?” Ashlyn says, completely zoomed out.

Ali chuckles, the blonde’s ability to let go of the outside world will never stop to amaze her. ”I asked what you are thinking about. You’ve been quiet for a while.” 

”Oh, nothing…” she replies vaguely. Ali gives her a look, letting her know she don’t believe her, not at all. The blonde sigh and takes a deep breath. ”I was just thinking about the future, the move and stuff.” 

”Okay, what about it?” 

Again, Ashlyn takes a deep breath. ”Don’tyouthinktheymightneedarightback,” she rushes out and Ali juts looks at her, no idea what she just said. 

”You need to repeat that baby, I have no clue what those words meant, if they were even English.” 

”I’ve been thinking a bit. And don’t you think Tyresö could need the best right back in the world on the team?” she says somewhat hesitantly, and a whole lot slower. 

Ali looks at her, putting it all together. ”You want to ask them to offer me a contract?” she asks for clarification. 

”Yeah, or nah…I don't know. I was thinking it wouldn't hurt to mention that you won’t be playing anywhere during the off season, if you want to of course. I just though it would be nice to move over there together, and I honestly don't think I could do 3 months without you. No matter how much I want it,” the blonde gets out, blushing a bit at the end when she realizes that this might not be something Ali is the least bit interested in. 

”I…wow, I don’t know. I haven't even been thinking about that as a possible solution,” the brunette says and she can sees that Ashlyn backtracks a bit. ”BUT,” she continues as she takes her hand in her own. ”If it would be possible, I’d love to move over there with you. And either way, don’t even think about being away from me for three month, I’ll be off season and won’t have anything that keeps me from traveling over there to visit you, I’ve always wanted to see Stockholm.” 

”So if I ask my agent to make me a favor tomorrow, you would be fine with that?” Ashlyn asks the brunette to clarify the situation, not wanting to do anything to upset her.

”Yes, I’d be more than fine with that. But I also don’t want you to get your hopes up too much. Whatever happens, we’ll be more than fine.” 

 

Not more than 2 days later, Ali gets a call from her agent who’s asking how she would feel about playing in Sweden for the remaining part of the year. Tony Gustafsson, the head coach for Tyresö, had been thrilled to hear about the available right back, and they were more than eager to see her in the yellow and red jersey. 

When Ashlyn gets home, the brunette is trying to play it cool for as long as possible. Truth is, she's about to explode. When talking about it and Ashlyn suggested to mention it to Tyresö, Ali hadn’t believed it would go through. While telling the blonde not to get her hopes up, she was the one who didn’t want to get too disappointed if it didn't work out, she knew it was a long shot. 

They are sitting down eating dinner when she finally decides she can’t hold it in any longer. 

”I got a call today,” she starts and Ashlyn immediately puts her fork down, instantly knowing who the call came from based on Ali’s voice. Instead of answering she just looks at the brunette who eventually continues. ”I’ve been offered a short-term contract with Tyresö,” she says with a huge grin all over her face. ”They want me to come and play there during the fall as well.” 

Ashlyn stands up and walks over to Ali, who’s now sitting with tears in her eyes. She engulfs the shorter woman in a hug, no words needed for the moment. They stay like that for what feels like an entirety while Ali’s silently crying 

”I’m sorry, I didn’t think it would affect me this much,” she says as she's wiping her cheeks from the fallen tears. ”But when I got the call, I realized that I couldn’t stand the thought of having you an ocean away again, not even for three months,” she continues with a chuckle. ”I tried to convince you to not get your hopes up, but in reality I was more trying to convince myself that life would go on if you left and I had to stay here. That we would be just fine. But the moment he said they offered me a contract as well, I knew that I wouldn't have been fine.” 

Tears are now falling down her cheeks again and all Ashlyn can do is hug her even tighter. ”Both you, and we, would have survived another couple of months apart. But believe me when I say that I’m so happy we did this, and I’m so grateful they want you there as well,” she says. ”But I wasn’t really worried, who wouldn't want the best right back in the world on their team,” she continues with a smirk. ”I’m lucky enough to have her on my team every day.” 

At this, Ali can’t do nothing bit laugh. ”Smooth Harris, smooth…” she says as she gives the blonde a kiss. ”I need to call him back and let him know I’ll accept the offer.” 

”Sounds good, I’ll reheat our food in the meantime.” Ashlyn says as she grabs their plates. Just before Ali’s leaving the room, the blond calls her name. ”Hey Alex.” 

””Yeah?” 

Ashlyn gives her girlfriend her best dimple smile as she tilts her head to the side, just admiring the woman standing in the doorway for a second before speaking. ”We’re moving to Sweden, together.”

Ali giver her one of her own famous nose crinkling grins as she replies. ”Yes baby, we’re moving to Sweden together.” 

 

The big day comes only a week later when the two women board the flight in DC that takes them to Sweden and Stockholm. With only a few day until the first game, they practice already the day after arrival. They only warmup and stretch, meet the girls, talk to the coach,  and does a short interview together. When the day comes to an end, they are both exhausted and the jet lag is most definitely present. Being back at their new home, a castle of sort, they juts try to relax and find a rhythm that goes along with the Swedish time zone. 

It takes a few days but soon enough they are all set, both in their home, the city, and most importantly, within the team. Alongside some of the absolute best players in the world, they take on the last part of the season, including Champions League games. Meanwhile they hang out with the other American’s on the team, as well as others such as Ashlyn’s old friend from her time in the Flash, Caroline Seger. 

One of the absolute best parts of living abroad is the privacy. Both women can relax and enjoy life together without being afraid of someone recognizing them. One afternoon, as they are having a picnic in a park outside of Stockholm, Ashlyn brings it up. 

”Why can’t life always be like this?” she says quietly. 

Ali, not really catching on to what she is talking about, raises an eyebrow in confusion. 

”I mean like this private. You have been so relaxed since we got here and it is just nice to have it that way”

A little offended, Ali bites back, ”and with that I guess you mean I am uptight at home?” 

”Of course not Alex, you know what I mean. We are both more relaxed here but I’m just saying it’s nice to see you like this and not as guarded,” Ashlyn tries to save herself, knowing Ali won’t be happy. 

”You know I’m really trying to be more open and relaxed. I love you and I am definitely not ashamed of you or us, it’s just a little easier here where no one knows us,” Ali sighs and shrugs her shoulders. 

”I know baby, that’s what I’m saying,” Ashlyn says as she moves across the blanket they are both sitting on to be closer to the brunette. ”I’m not forcing you to anything, I’m more than happy with the life we are living but it is nice to have this escape for a little while to just do us.”

”I absolutely agree, it really is nice,” Ali says with a smile as she leans into the blonde. 

The afternoon continues as they are enjoying their time together, both of them posting a couple of pictures from the day and what they are doing as they live abroad for their family and friends to follow. 

 

Trips all over Sweden to play games, one to Paris to play PSG in Champions League, as well as a weekend in Barcelona are all things they experience during their time in Europe. When Ali leaves for a camp with the NT, Ashlyn stays in Stockholm, a little lost and lonely despite the short amount of time apart. 

”Come on Harris, what’s bothering you?” Seger asks after a particularly shitty practice from the keeper. 

”Nothing, just a bad day,” Ashlyn says as she throws her gloves on the ground.

”Does this bad day and crappy mood you’re in have something to do with a certain brunette being gone?” the Swede says with a wink. 

”Maaaaybe a little bit,” the keeper shrugs and smiles. ”She’s my life, so it’s just hard being away from her I guess.” The two blonde’s have known each other since playing together and kept in touch over the years. The Swedish midfielder have become a good friend of Ashlyn’s and she is well aware of the relationship between her two teammates and the struggles they’ve  faced in the past. 

”It’s a week Ash, you should come and hang out with some of us tonight, we’re having a game night,” Seger offers with a smile. ”I would love to kick your ass outside of the field as well.” 

 

Ali is back before Ashlyn knows it. She has been spending more time with her teammates instead of feeling sorry for herself at home, making the time go faster. As the season is over, the only thing left is the annual Swedish Football Gala before they return back stateside again. 

”Wow,” Ali says as the blonde comes down the stairs. She's dressed in a white dress shirt, a narrow black tie with a blue blazer over. She has her hair out and straightened and it is flowing around her shoulders. ”You look stunning babe.” 

Ashlyn is just as mesmerized by the brunette as she stands in the middle of the hallway in a black sleeveless dress ending mid thigh. ”You don’t look bad yourself,” she says with a wink as she recovers from the temporary shock. No matter how many times she sees Ali dressed up, her beauty always takes her breath away. 

”My eyes are up here,” Ali teasingly says pointing to her face as the blonde’s gaze is stuck a bit further down her body. ”Let’s go stud, Whit and Press are going to be here any second.” 

The couple walks outside of their castle as their ride plus up and Ashlyn jogs the last couple of steps to reached the door before the brunette. She opens it and holds it for Ali with a smile. ”After you gorgeous,” she says with a charming smile and Ali places a soft kiss on her lips before entering the car. Ashlyn takes a deep breath before following her, closing her eyes and thanking something greater than herself for giving the brunette to her.


End file.
